


Figuring Out This Thing Called Family

by Palindrome_Mystery



Series: Freewill is a Bitch [1]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Claire still exists, Good Sibling Allison Hargreeves, Good Sibling Diego Hargreeves, Good Sibling Klaus Hargreeves, Good Sibling Luther Hargreeves, Good Sibling Number Five | The Boy, Good Sibling Vanya Hargreeves, Reggie is for sure dead, figuring out how to be a family, if s2 ended with them landing in the correct timeline, ooc because these assholes will actually communicate for once in their lives, siblings working together as a family
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:35:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 64,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28208427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Palindrome_Mystery/pseuds/Palindrome_Mystery
Summary: The siblings travel from Dallas to the correct timeline on April 1st 2019, averting the Apocalypse. They're now trying to figure out how to be there for one another, come to terms with what they have been through, and help Vanya learn how to control her powers. To make this family thing work they already have the love part down, now they are trying to work on actually communicating and a few other things.
Relationships: Allison Hargreeves & Diego Hargreeves, Allison Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Allison Hargreeves & Luther Hargreeves, Allison Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Luther Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Klaus Hargreeves & Luther Hargreeves, Klaus Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Luther Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Allison Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Diego Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Klaus Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Luther Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Vanya Hargreeves
Series: Freewill is a Bitch [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2066349
Comments: 21
Kudos: 162





	1. Going Home for a (Non-Apocalyptic) Concert

Five stepped over a few of the commission assassin bodies to pick up the nearest briefcase. Diego said goodbye to Dot and Herb as he left to go check on their siblings and let them know that they would be on their way home soon.

Five returned to his former co-workers.

“So, this will take me and my siblings back to 2019? No time limits, no hidden surprises like only half of us make it, right?”

“Oh, yes of course!” said Herb, “We’re not the Handler, Five, no need trying to trick you.” He gave a nervous laugh.

“Good.” Said Five, fixing them with a glare. “Because if anything goes wrong, or we land in another apocalypse, I will find you both no matter what timeline you are in and kill you.” 

The cordiality he had shown them in front of Diego was long gone. Diego may have only spent a short time in the Commission, but he seemed to have become friendly with Dot and Herb in that short time. Five knew that threatening them in front of Diego would lead to a pointless argument of Diego defending them from his own brother simply because they helped him for 10 minutes. 

“Well, it will take you back to 2019, but the apocalypse will be entirely up to you and your family.” Said Dot.

“What” snapped Five, “does that mean.”

“You can’t just jump in time to the day after an event hoping to have averted it and everything be fine.” Explained Dot. “There’s no telling what reality you would travel to.”

“Yeah, you could get back to your timeline and everything may seem fine at first, but after a few months you may start to notice the effects of trying to live like an event didn’t happen without actually, well, averting it. For example, strange political tensions, civil unrest, un-natural natural disasters, or even a pandemic!” Exclaimed Herb.

“So what are you saying? That my siblings and I are going to land in an apocalypse again if we travel back?”

“Oh, no, just that if an apocalypse happens when you return will be up to your own actions. We can’t alter that, or skip past it, free will and all.” Hurried Dot. “You and your family will land back in April 1st, 2019, and after that what happens is up to you.”

“Another chance to try to avoid it… again. Alright.” Said Five.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Five stood in a circle with his siblings, both of his hands on the briefcase, while Allison and Diego each had a hand on his shoulders. Klaus had just rejoined them after putting on a ridiculous cowboy hat. Five looked around at his siblings one last time. Was this is it? Would they all be safe after this? He activated the briefcase and blue light washed over them all.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

APRIL 1ST 2019

Five found himself outside. He was no longer holding a briefcase. He quickly looked around and saw that he appeared to be back in 2019… he was walking down this street the day of the apocalypse. He had just returned Delores to the department store, he said his goodbyes as he parted ways with her for the final time. He was walking home on this street when… OH SHIT.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Allison was lying on her childhood bed, her back turned to the door. She was back at the Academy? Her hands quickly went to her throat, checking for the laceration but found… nothing. She sat up and saw Luther staring at her, sitting in the same spot he had been in the last time they were both here. He looked the same as he did in Dallas.

“Did it work?” Asked Luther.

Allison saw her reflection in the mirror. She looked the same as she did when they left 1963, but she was back in the Academy, apparently in the exact same spot she had been in right before-

“Oh my god!” She turned to Luther. She remembered where her other siblings were at this point the first time around. “VANYA!”

Allison darted out of the room, Luther on her heels. Diego and Klaus were both in hallway, looking confused.

“Allison, what’s wrong?” Diego yelled as she bolted past him.

“VANYA! SHE’S STILL IN THE BASEMENT!” She heard Diego swear behind her, and more footsteps following her. They all shoved their way into the elevator; Klaus repeatedly pressed the button to try to make the doors close faster. Through the sliver of the opening they saw a flash of blue light as Five appeared outside of the doors right before they closed. Another flash of blue and he was in the elevator with them. He must have traveled a great distance because he was out of breath.

“Is she –“ he gasped out.

“Locked in the basement.” Answered Allison, worry etched on her face. As if to emphasize the point they felt a shockwave shake the elevator. 

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Vanya couldn’t breathe. She was back in the room – her room. The anechoic chamber dad built to contain her. The silence was deafening. She was overwhelmed and deprived of her senses at the same time. She was hyperventilating, and even the noise of her struggling to breathe was off in this room. She felt a wave of energy emanate from her as her panic increased.

No, no, no, no, no! Not again! She needed to calm down, she needed to get control over – she felt another wave as she continued to panic, this time she saw dust fall from the basement ceiling through the chamber’s door window. 

No! I’m doing it again! Thought Vanya, she had to get control, she couldn’t allow herself to-

Bright blue light lit up the dark basement hallway and Vanya saw Five as he ran to the chamber door, a look of panic on his face. She pounded on the glass, tears streaming down her face. 

“Let me out! Please let me out!” She sobbed even though she knew he couldn’t hear her. She tried to reel in the energy emanating from her. The last time she had knocked down the entire chamber wall. She couldn’t allow herself to do that this time, she couldn’t hurt Five! She tried to concentrate, if she lost control the wall would come crashing down again and it could crush her brother.

In the distance the elevator doors opened and the rest of her siblings rushed out. Five was trying to get the lock to move, but it wouldn’t budge. He looked at her through the glass with a look of worry, he was saying something but she couldn’t hear him. She saw his hands glow blue, and then fade out. He was trying to jump, but didn’t seem to have the energy. The others were at the door now, Diego and Luther turned the old, heavy lock. The door started to open and Allison grabbed a hold of Vanya as soon as she could reach her and yanked her out of the chamber.

Allison had her in a tight hug and Vanya clung to her sister like a lifeline. She felt someone else join the hug, and a hand on her shoulder. She was sobbing into Allison’s shoulder. Her siblings were talking, what were they saying?

“ – you okay? Vanya?”

Vanya tried to nod while being hugged by multiple siblings. She took a few deep breaths, trying to gather herself. She no longer felt the energy rippling under her skin. She was out, she was safe, no one was attacking her.

“Yeah. Yeah I’m okay.” She said with a shaky voice.

“Are you… sure?” asked Luther. Allison glared at him.

“So… anyone know what’s going on? How are we here when we’ve… already been here?” Asked Klaus.

“The Commission,” Answered Five, “they can see, travel through, and stop time. It seems that traveling back with the briefcase, they had our older selves and our consciences’ inhabit the space our younger selves were in at the tipping point of the apocalypse.”

“Tipping point?” questioned Diego.

“This was likely the defining moment of whether the apocalypse happened, or not.”

“Scale of one to ten, how murderous are you feeling, Vanya?” asked Diego.

“Zero. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” Vanya choked out.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay Vanny.” Said Klaus, as he hugged a bit tighter.

“Do you remember… remember why you did it last time?” asked Luther.

Five and Allison glared at him, that was not a good question at this time.

“I – I was panicking. I couldn’t breathe in there. And I … I started to remember when dad locked me in there before. How it felt… to be locked in there….staring at the walls for days… How I was isolated from all of you… by all of you, even after I was let out. Being locked in there was when I became… just ordinary… while the rest of you got to be special. And I was angry. I was so angry.”

Her siblings were quiet, taking in what she said. She may have destroyed the world, but she was locked away in her own personal torture chamber after coming to her family for help, found out her sister had changed how she thought of herself when they were kids with a rumor, was being manipulated by a serial killer, found out she had powers due to said serial killer, and that dad, mom, and Pogo gas-lighted her for nearly her entire life. It was a lot to handle for someone who’s powers are connected to their emotions; and who also never felt such emotions before thanks to being drugged nearly her entire life.

“I’m sorry I hurt you. All of you. I’m so sorry.” Allison’s look of shock when Vanya slashed her throat would haunt her forever, as would the image of her brothers suspended in air as she sucked the life out of them. Oh god, what did she do?

“It’s okay, Vanya.” Diego said while giving her shoulder a squeeze.

“I never should have locked you in there.” Said Luther, “It wasn’t right, you came home looking for help, for your family… and I just acted like dad and hurt you.”

“I didn’t mean to destroy the moon, or the world. I was so mad that you guys ruined my concert, I was just trying to stop you! But I was so angry, I tried to kill you. I’m so sorry! I don’t know how I did that. I just remember a loud noise near my ear at the theatre, and then I was getting hit by Sissy’s car.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. We probably should have listened to Allison and just let you play.” Said Five.

“Allison? I’m the one who kept saying that we should just talk to Vanya!” Interjected Klaus.

“Not the time, Klaus.” Said Luther as Diego rolled his eyes.

“Sorry for almost shooting you.” Said Allison.

“Sorry for almost killing you.” Vanya returned.

“So is it… over?” asked Klaus.

“Looks like it.” Said Five as he looked over at Vanya. She was no longer crying, but was still tightly hugging Allison. “Though, we should work on training for you to have control over your powers.”

“I,” Vanya started and then took a deep breath. She unwrapped her arms from Allison, releasing the hug, “I think I should go back on my medication. I’m too dangerous.”

She meant it. She had nearly killed her siblings, and she destroyed the world. In Dallas she thought she had control, even showed off by blowing up the fruit at dinner. But then she killed an entire floor of FBI agents, and would have caused the apocalypse again if Ben hadn’t saved her… saved the world from her. At the farm, she wouldn’t consider that control. She had acted on instinct when the assassins started shooting at them, and she had sent a massive wave of energy across the field killing possibly hundreds of people.

There was an uproar.

“Dad was an asshole for drugging you! You never had a chance to learn how to control your powers!” Diego yelled.

“That medication made you numb your whole life!” Allison added.

“Vanya,” Klaus said softly, looking her in the eyes, “is that really what you want?” He was not about to tell someone else to not suppress their powers when he had been doing it for decades. But his power was not a pleasant one with ghosts yelling at you all the time. Vanya had always wanted powers, and she didn’t seem to hate them. She just seemed scared.

“No, when I stopped taking it, it was… it was amazing. I didn’t know emotions could feel so… so much. I didn’t know everything felt so dulled down before. But, the medication kept me from hurting people. I don’t want to hurt anyone. I couldn’t live with myself if I did.” Vanya was staring at the ground now.

Klaus looked at his sister with sadness in his eyes. She had been drugged her entire life, prevented from being able to feel emotions fully, and didn’t even know it. They grew up with her and never noticed. Never paid attention to what was happening to little Number 7, just like dad wanted.

“Vanya,” Five waited for her to look at him, “none of us had control over our powers, remember? It took years of training. Of course you don’t have control right away. But you can practice, and learn.”

It was true, Vanya could recall numerous accidents due to her siblings powers. Luther would injure himself trying to lift something too heavy under dad’s instruction, Allison frequently sent her siblings to the infirmary if she didn’t carefully word her rumors, and it was not uncommon for Five to fall after blinking above the ground. But none of their lapses of control ended all life on Earth. 

“I caused the apocalypse twi- no three! Three times counting the one you were stuck in for 45 years! Dad stopped training me when I was 4 because I was too dangerous. Even Pogo told me I was too dangerous.” Vanya finished sadly.

“Dad was an abusive asshole who only cared about how much he could exploit us.” Said Diego, “What he did was not about you being too dangerous, or you not being able to control it, it was about him not being able to control you.”

Vanya wanted to believe him. That it was dads failure, not hers.

“It would be better if you learned how to control, rather than suppress your powers.” Five said gently.

“Yeah, now that we know what those pills were doing to you, you shouldn’t take them anymore!” Allison added.

“And Pogo never questioned dad, always just did whatever he said. He’s not really a moral compass.” Chipped in Klaus.

“If you’re scared, let us help you.” Said Luther.

God she did not want to take that medication again. And her siblings wanted to help her figure out how to control her powers. Isn’t that what she always wanted? For her siblings to be there for her, care about her? But would this just be putting their lives in unnecessary risk? She couldn’t live with herself if she hurt them.

“You won’t go through this alone, Vanya.” Diego said, pulling her out of her thoughts, “You’ve got us. We’ll work through this, like a family.” She looked at him with uncertainty. She would much rather have control over her powers instead of living the rest of her life on the medication. Could she even live with the medication again now that she knows what life feels like without it? Diego lifted his fist.

“Team Zero?” he asked.

Vanya looked at the fist he was offering to her. She wouldn’t be alone. Her family would help her. They wanted to help her! She could trust them to be there for her, or to intervene if she started to lose control again. Her lip started to tremble. She slowly lifted her fist and gently bumped Diego’s.

“Team Zero.” She answered.

He gave her a soft smile, and Klaus and Allison enveloped her in another hug.

Luther rubbed his hands together and said, “Alright, so, training! We should probably start with-“

“As much as I admire your enthusiasm to start, Luther, I think right now in our newly non-apocalyptic world, the best way to keep it non-apocalyptic for the near future is to not have Vanya tank her career.” Interrupted Five.

“What are you talking about, Five?” Asked Luther.

“Oh shit! The concert!” Vanya exclaimed, and then realization hit, “I haven’t practiced in over a month!” 

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

The elevator slowly ascended up with the six siblings crammed inside. After the initial panic which had a few small energy waves emanate from Vanya, the siblings quickly came up with a plan. Vanya and Five would go to her apartment so she can try to cram in as much practice as she could before the concert. Five insisted that they stay in groups, just in case the Commission reneged on their promise. Even if they didn’t try to make the apocalypse happen, Five wouldn’t put it past them to have “forgotten” to recall Hazel and Cha-Cha out of spite. Although Five did hope Hazel was living a happy life with Agnes somewhere, he did save his family after all. They would meet up at the Icarus theatre later. Her siblings wanted to attend the concert to listen this time, and not attack her, which was nice. Vanya told them that there would be tickets for them at the front desk. It felt like she had arranged that a lifetime ago, back then she had reserved the tickets under Leonard’s, no, Harold’s insistence. She realized now that it was because he wanted it to hurt more if she had hoped they would attend. They did end up attending, just not in supporting way. This time though, it wouldn’t just be Allison who showed up with the intent to be supportive. Wait… Allison…

“Allison?” Vanya said, turning to her sister.

“Yeah?”

“You don’t have to come,” that came out wrong, “you must be dying to go see Claire right now, you should go!”

Allison took a deep breath.

“I am. I want to see her so bad. But, I thought about it and if I leave now I’ll just arrive in the middle of the night. And, if I show up out of the blue Patrick would possibly file for a restraining order, or at the very least it would take me even longer to get visitation.” Allison had tears in her eyes now.

Vanya reached over and squeezed her hand. Their brothers were clearly listening but seemed unsure of how to offer support.

“So,” continued Allison, “what I am going to do instead is call and demand to speak to my daughter. And then after that I am going to call my lawyer and demand that they find a way to get me a visit so I can see her, without jeopardizing my chances for future visitation or custody.” She took a deep breath as Vanya wrapped an arm around her. The doors opened and they filed out.

“See you in a few hours.” Allison said while hugging Vanya.

“And this time we will not storm the stage.” Added Klaus. Diego smacked him.

“Thanks Klaus, I appreciate that.” She said while giving him a smile.  


____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Five sat in a chair with his eyes closed, listening to Vanya practice. He was exhausted, the last two weeks were easily the most stressful of his life as he worked to avoid apocalypses and keep his siblings alive. But he wasn’t done yet. In this timeline there was more than one crime scene that could be incriminating to his siblings and Five was thinking of how best to handle them after the concert. At least he had already sent Cha-Cha’s gun to the detective Diego trusted, Beeman, before jumping to 1963, so that was at least one potential murder charge avoided.

As he thought of what to do, he was also aware that this was perhaps the most comfortable he had been in a very long time. His living siblings were still alive, the various apocalypses seemed to have been averted, and he was listening to Vanya’s music just like old times. When they were kids, she always played new pieces she was working on to him first. He was secretly happy whenever she did. In a house of perfectionism and competition, she trusted him and wanted to share something that was important to her with him. It was nice to have someone care about you so much that they share something like that with you.

He didn’t think he fell asleep, but he felt someone shaking his shoulder and he jerked awake. He was about to blink away when he saw it was Vanya standing in front of him, already dressed for the concert, saying it was time to go.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

They had convened in front of the theatre, Vanya saying a quick greeting to her siblings before heading to the staff entrance to the stage, still looking nervous. Allison made sure her brothers dressed appropriately for the event before they left the Academy, and made Diego leave his knife harness at home. Five had taken the time before the start of the concert to ask Allison what she remembered, and who may have seen her, that led her to finding Vanya at the cabin so he could come up with a plausible story for them if they were questioned. And in case there was more evidence he had to destroy.

The Hargreeves siblings sat in the audience as they listened to the concert and watched as Vanya played. Her few hours of emergency practice seemed to have worked, as she sounded extraordinary. A look around showed that other audience members agreed.

The concert ended to loud applause, with no explosions, shootouts, or life draining energy tentacles.

They met up with Vanya as she exited from the stage door. She looked happy, but had an even bigger smile once she saw them. They talked amongst themselves as they headed out of the theatre.

“Did you get to talk to Claire?” Vanya asked hesitantly. She hoped Allison got the chance to speak to her daughter, it had been so long since Allison heard her voice. But if Allison didn’t get to speak to her, bringing it up would be painful.

“Yeah.” Allison replied. “I got to talk to her, she said she misses me and wants to see me.” She had a huge smile on her face and tears in her eyes again.

“That’s great! I’m so happy you got to speak to her!” Exclaimed Vanya.

“That’s not all. I also get to see her tomorrow!”

“What? How? I mean that’s great but wow your lawyer works fast!”

“Oh, no, my lawyer apparently started on this a few days ago. The Judge saw the magazine interview Patrick did. The ‘we’re doing fine’ interview.” She said while rolling her eyes, “He didn’t like that Patrick used Claire against me, or what he said about me in front of her. Add the fact that it was released the day after Dad’s funeral was another issue. The Judge has granted me a visitation because Patrick was an insensitive jerk and used Claire to try to hurt me.”

“That’s great! I mean, not the article, but the rest of it.” said Vanya. 

The Hargreeves made their way back to the Academy. Allison grabbed her luggage and left in a cab soon after they arrived, trying to catch the red-eye flight back to California. 

“Call me sometime tomorrow,” Vanya said while embracing her sister in a farewell hug, “so I know you made it home safe.”

“Of course.” Allison promised, “I love you.”


	2. Cleaning Crime Scenes and Communicating for Once

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five and Diego clean up crime scenes, breakfast is made (twice), and the siblings hear from someone very important

APRIL 2ND 2019

Diego was ready to go to sleep. He tried to remember the last time he got a good nights sleep, not counting when Lila drugged him. His siblings had all made their way to their rooms, exhausted from the events of the past few days. Well, Vanya made her way to the guest room mom had set up for her during the funeral. Her childhood bedroom was no longer in existence since Klaus tore down the wall between their bedrooms sometime after she moved out of the Academy to give himself a bigger room.

Bedroom size was another asshole manipulation tactic of their father. Clearly showing his preferences by giving the children he deemed more worthy of taking up space larger rooms. Luther and Allison’s rooms were the largest with plenty of space and windows, followed by Five’s. Ben’s and Diego’s rooms were smaller than the others, but roughly the same size. Klaus’s room was at first a small square room, that barely fit his bed, before he knocked down the wall and took over the space that was Vanya’s room after she moved out. Vanya’s room had been the smallest, practically the size of a closet, that a bed and desk barely fit in.

Diego laid on his bed, ready to fall asleep, when a flash of light jerked him back to alertness and he reflexively threw a knife, only to curve its trajectory before it hit the target, as he realized it was Five.

“Jesus Five! What are you doing, I could’ve stabbed you!”

“We’ve got work to do. Come on.” 

“What are you talking about?” Diego checked the clock, it was just past midnight, “The apocalypse has been averted, right?”

“Yeah, but in case you forgot there are two crime scenes with some very incriminating evidence, including your car. I can do a lot on my own, but unfortunately not even I can drive two cars at once, so, let’s go.” Replied Five. “Unless you want to leave your car at Harold Jenkins’ cabin.”

Diego stared at him for a few seconds before getting up and grabbing his harness.

“For future reference,” Diego said while putting on his harness, “you could just say what you need without the condescending rudeness.”

__________________________________________________________________________

The two brothers were outside of Harold Jenkins’ home. Five had parked the car a few blocks away on a dark side street. He grabbed Diego’s arm and blinked them inside the house.

“Don’t touch the body.” Said Five. He had explained the plan to Diego on the drive there. Vanya had told him on their way to her apartment that she had found dad’s journal in Jenkins’ home, realized he had been manipulating her, and killed him when he became abusive after her discovery. He had even confessed to killing the former first violin. Five never killed for personal reasons, but the more Five learned about Jenkins the more he wished he could have been the one to kill him. They needed to find the journal, check the house for anything else incriminating, and clean Five’s blood from the attic floor from when he passed out from his shrapnel wound. 

Five, Diego, and Allison had already searched the house before. And Klaus had also been there when they returned looking for Vanya. Not realizing it would later be a crime scene, they didn’t wear gloves. Rather than try to clean any trace they may have left behind, which could lead to a very suspicious crime scene to any forensic team, they would simply say that they had been in the house in search of Vanya, and that Jenkins had let them in to show them that she wasn’t there. But any trace of them in the Umbrella-Academy-Hatred shrine of an attic would be suspicious.

Diego found the journal while Five grabbed a bottle of bleach from the kitchen. Diego looked for anything else that may be incriminating while Five blinked up to the attic. He had just finished removing his blood stain when he heard Diego call up to him from below.

“Five.”

“What?”

“I need the bleach down here.”

That was ominous, and whatever reason Diego needed bleach for was going to be a problem.

Five blinked down to him, the bleach in his hand.

“What is it?”

Diego gestured to the bathroom. Five walked in and stopped in the doorway.

“Shit…” said Five.

The bathtub was stained with blood.

“Yeah.” Said Diego. “No clue whose blood it is, but just in case…”

__________________________________________________________________________

After cleaning the tub and finding nothing else potentially incriminating (Five checked the shattered front door glass shards from when Diego had jumped through it, making sure none of them had a trace of blood), the brothers were back in the car heading towards the cabin.

Allison told Five about how she had convinced an Officer, she thinks his name was Cheddar, to let her tag along on his investigation when she had noticed Vanya’s scarf at a crime scene, and how that eventually led her to the cabin. They needed to remove Allison’s blood from the cabin (Five was pretty sure he remembers her having landed on a rug, it may be easiest to just take it with them), and get Diego’s car.

While Five drove, Diego was reading dads journal in the passenger seat, and seemed to be getting more agitated the more he read. After nearly an hour, Diego got to a part where he slammed the journal close and angrily punched the door.

“What is it?” asked Five.

Diego gave an angry huff.

“I know you’re prone to angry outbursts, but we already knew dad was an asshole. What in that journal has gotten you so upset?”

“He fucking used us!” growled Diego.

“Yeah, no shit, that was the basis of our entire childhood.” Replied Five.

“No, he fucking used us to isolate Vanya!”

“What?”

Diego flipped open the journal, “Methods of suppressing her power” He read out loud, “mood altering medication to keep her sedated, suppress confidence in independent pursuits that cannot be supervised, memory altercation, he wrote number 3 next to that one.” Diego turned a few pages and continued, “Methods of suppression showing promising results. Additional methods to be implemented. If she is to believe that she is ordinary, she must not feel included with her extraordinary siblings. Encourage other children to associate her ordinariness with disapproval. Encourage activities that exclude her, discourage play activities that include her. Show approval when children engage in exclusionist behavior or rhetoric.”

“That manipulative prick.” Said Five.

“We fucking played right into his plan!” growled Diego. How often did he say something mean to Vanya to show dad that he wasn’t like her, to distance association from her in their fathers eyes? That he was special, not like ordinary Number 7. To show himself that he may be Number 2 in the family, but at least he wasn’t dead last. Not only that, but they were heroes and their lives were dangerous. Vanya had to stay away or she could get hurt, their lifestyle wasn’t for her. When they were attacked at the house, he was scared that she could have been killed and he yelled at her for being a liability.

What really made Diego angry was that to dad, he always seemed to be second best at everything, except for how he excluded Vanya. Reginald Hargreeves noted that Diego seemed the most receptive to excluding Vanya in his pursuit to seek Reginald’s approval. The one thing Reginald felt Diego was number one at was excluding Vanya. He excelled at hurting his sister. Fuck.

He hated that. He loved his siblings, he loved Vanya. And he hurt her to appease their asshole father. He didn’t even realize he was being used. Diego recalled when they were teenagers, he and Vanya started to bond over music. Dad started him on music lessons, saying it was important to be able to read sheet music so he could notice hidden ciphers, or could hold a conversation about the classics. He started to learn guitar, and he really liked it. He and Vanya started to practice together, she had asked mom for some rock music sheets since Diego liked that better than classical. She seemed so happy when they practiced together. Then… things happened and dad ended his music lessons. Over night the guitar was removed from the house, along with any sheet music that wasn’t classical. He didn’t talk to Vanya about music again after that. He thought it was because dad decided ordinary things like music was not a good use of his time, Diego had to focus on saving people, on being a hero. Now, he saw it as another way dad implemented Vanya’s isolation.

“Anything useful in there?” asked Five, bringing Diego out of his thoughs.

“How are you defining ‘useful’?” questioned Diego.

“Anything that may help us understand more about her powers. We know her powers are based on sound wave manipulation; she can take in and turn sound waves into energy, sort of like a violin, which is oddly fitting.”

Diego flipped through the pages while saying “The few trainings he wrote about he mentions using a tuning fork and having her break wine glasses… she could do it in a calm environment but if there was chaos she couldn’t focus and… “ Diego broke off.

“And?”

“She accidentally broke his monocle and that’s when he starts writing about power suppression.”

“His monocle?”

“Yeah. That was his deciding factor to… to do what he did to her.” Diego let out a sigh, “He still studied her like the rest of us after, but there’s not much about her powers. For one of the sleep studies he wrote that she ‘exhibited power during REM sleep.’ But there’s no explanation of what that means.”

“Interesting.” Five seemed to be contemplating something before asking “Does it mention anything about the weather? Specifically rain?”

“How did you know that?” Diego asked. “I saw rain mentioned I think twice in some of the entries, seemed weird for dad to be commenting on the weather.”

“That’s how I found her in Dallas. Atmospheric radar, tracked her through sound waves. I knew such strong sound waves could affect the atmosphere, but I wasn’t sure if she could actually change it enough to cause it to rain. Until now. Makes sense though, why it always seemed to rain when Vanya was really upset. Dad may have suppressed her powers, but they weren’t completely off. Pretty cool.”

Five had a small, almost indiscernible smile, and something in his voice struck Diego. He sounded…happy? Which was odd, not only that he was happy, but that it was about how powerful someone else was. He recalled that Five always seemed closest to Vanya when they were kids. Diego thought it was because Five didn’t view Vanya as competition, but maybe that wasn’t it.

“You really care about her, don’t you?” Diego asked.

Five’s face returned to his usual scowl, and he fixed Diego with a glare. Did he just offend him?

“Why is that a question?” snapped Five.

Diego tried to backtrack, he didn’t think what he said would offend Five. But it very obviously had.

“No, it’s just that, you always seem so annoyed with the rest of us all the time, but not-“

“Just because you annoy me doesn’t mean I don’t care about you!”

“You care about us?” Diego knew it was the wrong thing to say the moment it came out.

Five stared intensely at the road, his jaw clench and his knuckles turning white on the wheel. Everything he did, he did for his family. He spent 45 years trying to get back to them, to save them! How could Diego not realize that he cared about him? That he loved all of them, and would do anything, did do everything, to keep them alive. Did he have to spell it out for the idiot? Save him from death a few more times?

“Hey man, s-s-sorry,” Diego was nervous, and wasn’t sure how best to handle the situation. All of dad’s training did not include emotional intelligence. Five did say he was Diego’s ‘loving brother’ when he blinked into the car Diego and Lila had stolen. He just figured Five was being a little shit. But apparently he meant it. “Love you, too.”

Five still stared at the road, but he wasn’t gripping the steering wheel as hard.

They sat in silence the rest of the drive. Diego continued reading through the journal, occasionally being hit with a wave of disgust with some of dads abusive training techniques. He read that dad started locking Klaus in mausoleums when they were 11, and Diego recalled that it was around that time that Klaus’s substance abuse started as he had begun sneaking alcohol from the bar. Shit. Dad really fucked all of them up.

They made it to the cabin and got out of the car. They were about to walk up the stairs when they both noticed something.

“Was he there the last time we were here?” Diego asked, looking at the corpse that was poorly covered and thrown in a wood pile.

“Didn’t notice him before, but we weren’t exactly taking in the scenery last time.” Answered Five. “He’s not one of ours, it doesn’t look like Vanya’s handiwork. And she would have mentioned another corpse if she knew about it.”

“Leave him?”

“Leave him.”

They made their way into the cabin. Rolled up the bloodstained rug and cleaned up the drops of blood that had fallen between the cabin to the car when they had carried Allison.

“May as well put it in my trunk.” Said Diego as they carried the rug out. “It’ll be bad enough if you get pulled over, looking like a kid and all. And I’m already wanted for murder.”

“No, you’re not.” Said Five as they heaved the rug into the trunk.

“Yes, I am. Did you forget about the part where I broke out of jail?”

“Hazel gave me Cha-Cha’s gun. I sent it to that Detective Beeman you trust. It should exonerate you for Patch’s murder.”

Diego looked at him in surprise. With everything going on with the apocalypse, he didn’t think Five would have taken the time, or thought it was worth the time, to make sure Diego didn’t get pinned for a murder he didn’t commit.

“Thanks, that was uh—really nice of you.”

“Don’t mention it.” Five said as he slammed the trunk. “Let’s meet up at the Academy. Try not to get arrested again.”

__________________________________________________________________________

They arrived back at the Academy in the morning with the sun out and shining. Instead of using the front door, they made their way to kitchen entrance. Five desperately needed a cup of coffee. They opened the door and walked into the middle of an argument.

Klaus and Vanya were sitting next to each other at the table. Klaus had an arm slung over her shoulders, holding her close in a half-hug. Mom was standing next to the stove. Luther was standing up, blocking Vanya from Pogo’s view while yelling at him. None of them ever yelled at Pogo, what the hell was going on?

“- you are just repeating the same bullshit as dad!” Luther spat out angrily.

“Miss Vanya is a danger to herself, and to others! Your father made the difficult decision years ago to protect her and everyone around her! She must resume her medication!” Pogo said with emphasis.

“Difficult decision?! She was a child! And she’s not a ‘danger’!” Luther shouted.

“What’s going on?” Diego asked as he walked into the middle of the room, standing next to Luther.

“I have been informed that Miss Vanya was released from the anechoic chamber without having resumed her medication!” exclaimed Pogo.

“She’s not a fucking prisoner, Pogo. She’s our sister. And what dad did to her was wrong.” Diego tried to keep his voice even.

“Her powers are too great! Too destructive! It is imperative that Miss Vanya takes her medication for the protection of herself and others!”

Vanya started to cry and buried her face into Klaus’ shoulder.

“She’s not a weapon, she’s a person!” Luther yelled.

“She is still too dangerous! As evident by the fact that Miss Vanya started this morning by apologizing to me for apparently killing me and destroying the Academy in another timeline! And causing the apocalypse!”

Oh, Vanya told him about that.

“At least she apologized.” Five said as he poured himself a cup of coffee. Pogo appeared to get even more agitated and turned to Five, about to retort, but Klaus interjected,

“Oh, don’t drink that.”

“Why not?” asked Five.

“Because mom’s been trying to drug Vanya all morning. She spiked the coffee. And the eggs.” Klaus answered.

Five and Diego turned to mom.

“Mom,” Diego questioned softly, “why did you do that?”

Mom turned to look at him.

“Vanya has to take her medication, dear.” She said with a smile.

“Why?” he asked.

“Diego, she’s programmed, this isn’t-“ Diego held up a hand to silence Luther.

“Why?” he asked again. She took a moment, apparently accessing the programming command.

“Your father said Number Seven must take her medication. If she is unwilling or unable to modulate her medication herself, I must intervene. So, I am intervening.”

They heard the sound of glass cracking as Vanya sobbed and Klaus hugged her tighter. Hearing mom refer to Vanya as Number 7 was unnerving. Mom never called them by their numbers, not after she gave them real names. Even Five, she would call him ‘Five’, not ‘Number Five.’ But it also showed how old that command was.

“Dad’s not here anymore, remember?” Diego reminded her gently as he held her hand, “And that medication wasn’t helping her, mom. It was hurting her.” 

She was programmed to intervene if someone was in danger, he needed mom to realize that Vanya was not in danger if she didn’t take the medication.

“If she doesn’t want to take it anymore, she shouldn’t have to.” He finished. He hoped that would work. He knew she wasn’t just a machine, she didn’t have to follow her programming if she didn’t want to. Not now that dad was gone.

Mom’s smile faded, and her face changed to a look of concern. She turned to Vanya.

“Is that true, Vanya? Was the medication hurting you?”

Vanya lifted her face to look at mom. The tearstains seemed to give mom her answer.

“I’m so sorry dear. Do you want to stop taking it?” mom asked.

Vanya nodded.

“Okay, dear.” She grabbed the pot of coffee and emptied it into the sink; she then moved to throw away the drugged eggs as well. 

That… worked. He turned back to Pogo, who looked ready to burst a blood vessel.

“This does not change the fact that Miss Vanya is too dangerous! As evidenced by the timeline you all claim to have averted!” Pogo exclaimed.

“She is not going to take that medication anymore. And she will never step foot in that dungeon.” Luther said with an air of authority to let Pogo know this was not up for debate, “Maybe if you hadn’t helped dad drug her and kept her numb her entire life, she wouldn’t have been so overwhelmed when everything came to light.”

Pogo looked around at them with a look of disapproval, and moved slightly so he could see Vanya.

“Miss Vanya, I love you, but this is a mistake!”

Vanya turned to look at him. Her face was red and splotchy from crying.

“You don’t get to say that you love me, not after what you did to me. That’s not love.” She took a deep steadying breath, “I am sorry for what I did to you in the other timeline, Pogo. I will regret that for the rest of my life. But that doesn’t make what you and dad did to me right.”

Pogo looked around at them all one more time, huffed, and stormed out of the kitchen.

“Well, now that that’s over, maybe we can have a non-roofied breakfast.” Said Klaus.

“And coffee.” Added Five, who had already started working on a fresh pot.

“You okay?” Luther asked Vanya as he sat down. Vanya took a shuddering breath and then shook her head. Making it clear she wasn’t ready to talk.

Luther turned his attention to Diego and Five.

“Where the hell have you two been, by the way?” He asked.

“Cleaning crime scenes.” Answered Five. “So hopefully, none of us are accused of murder. Again. We all need to get our stories straight, though.”

Oh. The others had forgotten about those.

“That reminds me,” said Diego, “Vanya, did you know anything about the corpse in the woodpile at the cabin?”

That was a surprising question.

“What? No! There was a body at the cabin?!” Vanya asked.

“Yeah, figured you didn’t know. Guess it was more of Jenkins’ work.” Answered Diego.

“What did you do with it?” questioned Luther.

“Nothing,” answered Five, “none of us killed him. Best not to touch the body. No reason to hide one of Jenkins’ kills. Besides, another corpse will add to the ‘serial killer got himself killed’ narrative.”

“What do you mean?” asked Luther.

Five poured himself a cup of coffee and turned to his siblings. He then told them the story they were all to stick to. 

Allison was greatly concerned after finding ‘Leonard’ in Vanya’s apartment and started looking into him. Too many people had seen Vanya with Jenkins, so they couldn’t claim she didn’t know him. Vanya thought Allison was just being overprotective, and continued to see him. When she couldn’t get ahold of Vanya one day, she went to ‘Leonard’s’ house with Klaus, and looked around, not believing him that Vanya wasn’t there. When they later found out that Vanya was a no-show for practice, Diego and Five went to look for her (and of course ‘Leonard’ let them in willingly). That would explain any of their fingerprints being in the house.

Through a very thorough search at the library (and not stolen police records), Allison discovered that Leonard Peabody was actually Harold Jenkins, a known murderer. She found the address to a cabin that Jenkins owned, and feared the worst. She called the Academy and told Diego of her discovery, and that she was leaving immediately to find Vanya. When she found the cabin empty, she went to the town to search, and met Officer Cheddar at a crime scene, tagged along with him, realized the woman that the sole survivor was describing was Vanya, and went back to the cabin where she found Vanya alone.

Meanwhile, Diego had been arrested before he could tell any of the others. And upon his ‘release’ from jail rushed home and they all left to go to the cabin. When they arrived they found Allison pleading with Vanya to leave. Eventually they convinced her to leave with them, and left before Jenkins returned. They all returned to the Academy and stayed there, having an important family talk. No one left until it was time to get ready for Vanya’s concert the next evening. 

That was the chain of events they were all to follow. They knew nothing of the corpse in the woodpile, or that Jenkins was killed in his home. They had all been together at the Academy when those events would have taken place.

“Any questions?” Five finished.

Klaus raised his hand.

“About anything I just said.” Five qualified.

Klaus lowered his hand.

“What about Helen?” Vanya asked quietly. “Harold told me he killed her. Her family still thinks she’s missing, they should know-“

“No. I’m sorry, Vanya. But you can’t say that he admitted that to you.” She opened her mouth to argue but he cut her off, “I’ll find out what he did with her. Her family will have closure from an anonymous tip. But you can’t implicate yourself in this. Okay?”

Vanya was uneasy with this plan. Helen was dead because of her. But if Vanya implicated herself, she would be implicating her siblings as well. If Five said he would find out what happened to her, he would. Vanya nodded.

Mom approached the table carrying five plates.

“Eat up! Breakfast is the most important meal of the day!” She said, placing a plate in front of each of them as Diego and Five finally sat down. Two eggs with a strip of bacon, giving the appearance of a smiley face.

“Oh, hey, let me fix that for you Five!” Klaus said while reaching over to his plate, and flipped the strip of bacon to form a frowning face.

Five looked ready to murder him despite having spent over 45 years trying to save him. He picked up the strip and threw it onto Klaus’s plate, stating that he didn’t want anyone’s fingers on his food. They were distracted before a fight could break out when the phone started to ring. Luther stood up and answered it.

“Hello?”

“Luther? Hi!” Allison’s voice came through the receiver.

“Allison! Hey, so you made it home alright?”

“Yeah, is Vanya there? I tried calling her apartment but there was no answer.”

“Oh, yeah, she’s here, hang on,” Luther held out the phone, “Vanya, it’s Allison.”

Vanya stood up and took the phone.

“Allison?” she said.

“Vanya, hi! Are you okay, your voice sounds kind of…” she trailed off.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. Just had an interesting conversation with Pogo is all.”

“Oh. That must not have been fun.”

“No, it wasn’t. But you made it home okay? How was your flight?” Vanya asked, quickly changing the subject.

“Yep, home safe and sound, the flight was fine. I’m going to put you on speaker, someone wants to say hi.”

Vanya was wondering who Allison knew that would want to say hi to her when the voice of a young girl came through the receiver.

“Hi Aunty Vanya!”

“Claire?” Vanya was shocked. This was the first time she had ever spoken to her niece, first time she had ever heard her voice.

“Yes! Did I surprise you?” Claire laughed.

“Yeah you did! It’s so good to hear you! Your mom talked about you all the time when she was here.” Vanya now had tears in her eyes for an entirely different reason than a few minutes ago. Her brothers were listening intently as they ate. None of them had ever met Claire, but they all knew that they loved her. She was family.

“She did?”

“Yeah, she really missed you.” It wasn’t a lie, Allison just happened to say those things when she was trying to hurt Vanya’s feelings. But she made it clear how deeply she missed her daughter.

“Mommy said you had a concert last night!”

Vanya chatted with her niece for a while, occasionally Allison would chime in. At one point Claire said that her mom told her Five came home.

“Yeah, Five came home through a portal! It was really cool.” Said Vanya.

“He’s really there?!” exclaimed Claire.

“Yeah, I’m looking right at him.” Five gave her a questioning look. Most of her brothers had finished their breakfast, but stayed at the table slowly drinking their coffees so that they could listen in.

“Can I talk to him?”

“Yeah, hang on, Five,” Vanya called out to him, “Claire wants to talk to you.”

Five stood up and took the phone. He almost looked nervous.

“Hello?” He said into the receiver.

“UNCLE FIVE!” Claire shouted his name so loud all of them could hear. Five seemed completely unbothered by the decibel level; instead he just looked extremely happy that his niece was excited to talk to him.

Vanya resumed her seat and ate her now cold breakfast while listening to one side of the conversation. Claire seemed to have a ton of questions for Five, from his childhood, where he went to, and how he came home. Five answered all of her questions patiently; leaving out any gruesome details and giving honest and kid-friendly answers (though sometimes that required him to be quite vague). At some point Claire was made aware that all of them were there, and she started asking to speak to each of them. Five passed the phone to Klaus, and went to pour himself another cup of coffee. Eventually Klaus passed the phone to Diego, who later passed it to Luther. 

Luther was wrapping up the call and saying goodbye to Allison when Five blinked over and snatched the phone from his hand.

“Allison, call back sometime later when you’re free. We need to discuss a few things.” Five said.

Allison caught onto to what Five meant, and agreed that she would call later that day. Five handed the phone back to Luther, who still looked annoyed that Five had snatched it from him. He said goodbye to Allison and hung up the phone.

Despite how the morning started for them all, it ended very, very well.

__________________________________________________________________________

After he had removed the bloody rug from his trunk and gave it to Luther to incinerate (they both made sure Vanya didn’t see it, she felt bad enough about the accident as it was), Diego dropped Vanya off at her apartment before heading to the gym. They had all agreed after breakfast that they would help Vanya learn how to control her powers and would start coming up with a training plan. And she was to call them immediately if she felt she was about to lose control, or felt overwhelmed. Diego asked Klaus if Ben agreed with the plan, and then Vanya’s cup shattered and Klaus avoided their eyes. It was then revealed that Ben had… moved on. 

Vanya recounted how he had saved her, saved the world, back in the FBI building. She said that at some point during the torture (Five’s face paled and Luther’s eyes went wide at the news that she had been tortured. So much happened that day that the others all failed to inform the two that their sister had been drugged and electrocuted by the U.S. government), she retreated into her mind and started to remember everything she did. She said she had given up (which sounded very ominous to Diego but she refused to elaborate on that, and just shook her head when he asked), and then Ben appeared. He talked to her and convinced her to try to return… but then he started to… dissipate. He couldn’t hold on anymore. The news that they had lost Ben again was hard.


	3. Interrogations and a Long Overdue Hug

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The siblings are asked what the hell happened

APRIL 3RD 2019

Diego entered the boiler room and collapsed on his bed. He fell asleep almost immediately. He woke up at 4am and started cleaning the gym. He needed to finish before it opened, and he had a lot to do today.

He was almost done when Al walked in, and was surprised when he started yelling at him.

“What the hell are you-“ Al stopped mid-sentence when Diego turned to look at him. “Diego?” Al questioned.

“Who the hell else would be cleaning at,” Diego looked at the clock on the wall, “5:15 in the morning!?”

“I didn’t realize it was you, what the hell happened to your hair?” Al yelled back.

Oh. Right. His hair was now nearly shoulder length, a big difference from when Al saw him just a few days ago. No wonder he didn’t recognize him.

“Let’s just say it’s been a long day.” Diego answered.

“Is that one of your power things? Or something else?”

“Something else.”

“You okay?”

“Yeah, Al, I’m okay.”

“Alright.” Al said as he walked to his office.

Al had known Diego since he was a teenager, having let Diego stay at the gym shortly after he had left the Academy. Over the years he learned not to get involved with Diego’s shit, as getting involved usually resulted in some danger and a headache.

After Diego finished he went back to the boiler room, cleaned up, and grabbed a blowtorch before heading out to his first stop of the day: the Academy. He entered through the kitchen and saw a very disheveled looking Five chugging a cup of coffee.

“Busy night?” Diego asked, looking over Five’s grimy uniform. 

Five slammed the cup down on the counter and poured himself another.

“I found the violinist Jenkins killed. Cops found her about 20 minutes ago after an anonymous tip. They should be able to link it to Jenkins, cleanup didn’t seem to be a priority for him.”

“That was quick.” Said Diego. Five gave Diego a questioning look and gestured to the blowtorch in his hand.

“I’m gonna take the door off the chamber,” Diego said, lifting up the blowtorch, “make sure it can’t be used again.”

“Good idea.” 

“Yeah,” Diego started to walk out of the kitchen, “you should shower. And probably take a nap. But definitely shower.”

When the elevator doors opened Diego was surprised to see Luther in front of the chamber. And even more surprised to see a number of broken tools, including two broken crowbars, on the floor.

“What’re you doing there, big guy?” Diego called out. Luther turned towards him.

“Trying to get this door off, but there’s a bunch of titanium bolts.”

“Thought you could have just ripped it off.”

“You try getting a grip on this thing at an angle that will have enough leverage!” Luther spat back. He seemed annoyed that a door was besting him.

“Alright Number One, let’s figure this out.”

They came up with a plan that Diego would heat the top hinges with the blowtorch, making them more malleable, and Luther would start to try to rip it from the top down. After a few minutes a small creaking noise could be heard, which quickly became a much louder thundering noise as the hinges gave way. Diego quickly moved out of the way as Luther used the momentum and leverage to rip the door off entirely. It made a deafening noise as it fell to the floor and the two high-fived. 

Five came out of the elevator, wearing a clean uniform, and looked at the scene.

“I came to watch Diego struggle, but it looks like I missed it.” He said.

Diego was not about to let Five dampen their accomplishment.

“We made that door our bitch! Team Zero!” Diego exclaimed, and he and Luther high-fived again.

Five looked at the broken tools on the ground, and then at Luther.

“Why didn’t you just punch through the window? It would have the same effect of making it useless.” he asked.

“No! You are not ruining this!” Diego said while pointing at Five, “This is a win!”

“Yeah, what he said.” Added Luther, though Five did have a point and he was annoyed that he hadn’t thought of it himself.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Diego sat in his car, a bouquet of flowers in his passenger seat, as he drew up the courage to step out.

Eudora’s funeral had ended half an hour ago. He watched the last few mourners walk to their cars. He had wanted to attend the service, but most of her fellow officers blamed him for her death. Hell, he blamed himself for her death. If he showed up, it would cause a scene, and inevitably a fight. Her family didn’t deserve that. 

He watched the last car disappear from view, and he stepped out. He approached her grave and laid his flowers down with the others. He stood there for a long time, saying goodbye, apologizing for everything, and promising to be the kind of person she would be proud of. Promising that he would honor her memory.  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Vanya had said goodbye to her last student of the day and was now on the phone with Allison. After Allison had called Five yesterday to get the story they were to stick to, she had called Vanya again at her apartment just to talk. They both seemed to be trying to fill all the years of silence with conversation and make up for lost time. Conversation didn’t always come easy, but they both tried. Neither brought up any of the heavier topics; the rumor, the book, the exclusion… they both knew that those were conversations to be had in person. And even then, it’s not like everything that had happened would be erased, it would take time to be okay. But their relationship was worth the effort.

The conversation was interrupted when a knock came at Vanya’s door.

“Hang on, let me see who’s at the door.” Vanya said as she placed the phone down, thinking it may be one of her students who left something behind, or Mrs. Kowalski looking for Mr. Puddles again. No one else really knocked on her door. She opened it to see two police officers.

“Vanya Hargreeves?” the first one asked.

“Yes.” Vanya replied tentatively.

“We’re gonna have to ask you come down to the station to answer some questions.”

“What about?”

“Do you know a man by the name of Leonard Peabody?”

“Yes… I – why?”

“We’re gonna need you to come down to the station. Just some questions.”

“Okay, um, give me a minute, I was just on the phone with my sister, I need say bye and grab my stuff.”

“We’ll be right here ma’am.” Said the second officer, as he subtly placed his foot inside her door to prevent her from closing it.

“Hey, Allison,” Vanya said as she picked up the phone again, “I’ve gotta go, the police are here. They say they have some questions about Leonard.”

“Wait for my lawyer,” Allison said hurriedly, “don’t say anything until my lawyer gets there. I’ll send them to the station right away.”

“Is that really-“

“Yes. The police are not your friends Vanya! You have the right to a lawyer, so use it!”

“Okay.” Vanya agreed. They ended the call, and Vanya grabbed her things before heading out.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Diego made it back to gym. It had been a long day. It was dusk now and the sky was quickly darkening. He got out of his car and headed to the entrance, only to stop when he saw two officers approaching him. He sighed and slowly raised his hands to show he wasn’t holding a knife.

“You’re not under arrest, Hargreeves.” Said the first officer.

“Then why are you here?” asked Diego as he lowered his hands.

“We want to ask you some questions at the station,” said the second officer, “unless of course you have a guilty conscience about something and want to confess?”

“Confess what?” 

“With you, who knows, I’m sure there’s something.” The second officer answered.

“It’s about a man by the name of Leonard Peabody.” said the first officer.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

When Diego entered the station with the officers he was almost immediately greeted by a lawyer who introduced himself as Paul Jameson, who explained he was there at the request of Allison, and that his other siblings had all already given their statements. Diego asked where his siblings were now.

“They’re still here,” he said, “my colleague is with them. At first you were all brought in because of this Peabody guy, but now we’re also sorting through the fact that your brother who disappeared when you were all 13 is now back 17 years later and still looks 13. Though he’s claiming to be much older. But for now lets focus on getting through your questioning.”

“Right.” Said Diego.

Diego stuck to the series of events they had all agreed to. He knew his siblings would have kept their stories consistent, but with slight variations so that everything matched up but nothing would be verbatim as if they had rehearsed it. He could tell the officers questioning him were getting annoyed, they must have really wanted to pin the murder of the guy who had multiple knives stuck in him on the guy who always carried knives.

Eventually they ran out of questions and Diego was allowed to leave. He walked with Mr. Jameson to where the rest of the sibling supposedly were and saw Klaus in the hallway.

“Diego!” Klaus called out, “Glad to see you’re walking free and haven’t been arrested again!”

“Please, stop saying things like that.” Mr. Jameson said while pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Oh, come on, we’re not murderers!” Said Klaus, “Well, we are thanks to Dad, but not this time!”

Mr. Jameson took a deep breath. Diego realized that this must have been a very long day for the lawyers, too.

“Where are the others Klaus? And what’s going on with Five?” asked Diego.

“Over here. And speaking of murder, Five seems to be getting closer and closer to it. My bet is that if someone calls him ‘young man’ one more time he’ll finally snap.” Klaus answered gleefully.

Mr. Jameson quickened his pace.

They turned the corner to see Five standing up and pointing his finger at someone while yelling. Vanya had a hand on his shoulder, seemingly trying to gently hold him back, and Luther had a far off look on his face as if he was completely done with this whole thing. A woman in a suit, who Diego assumed was Mr. Jameson’s colleague, was straightening some papers before placing them in her briefcase.

“There is nothing left for us to discuss, officer.” The second lawyer said. “Mr. Number Five Hargreeves will attend the hearing to contest the presumption of death at the specified date. He and his family have answered your questions succinctly, and you have no reason to hold them. We will be leaving now.”

She stood up and saw Diego and Mr. Jameson. “You must be Diego.” She said, holding out her hand.

“Yeah, nice to meet you –“ he trailed off, not knowing her name.

“Abby Phillips,” she introduced herself and then looked around at them all “I believe we are all ready to go.”

They made their way out of the station and the lawyers departed after handing them their cards in case they were brought in again, and reminding them of court dates.

“What did I miss?” Diego asked his siblings. Five still looked agitated.

“Five was apparently declared dead, so we have to have a judge overturn that.” Vanya answered.

“And declare how old little Number Five is, legally.” Klaus added giddily.

“Enough!” said Luther, wanting to avoid a fight outside of the station. “Is everyone good? Klaus, stop talking!” He looked at Vanya and she gave a nod. He then turned his attention to Five, who was pointedly ignoring them.

“Five, you good?” Luther asked again.

“Fine.” Five answered.

And with that they headed out.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

APRIL 4TH 2019 Thursday

Vanya was asleep in her apartment. Luther had voiced more than once that he thought she should stay at the Academy for a while. But she didn’t want to see Pogo, and the Academy itself was not a good place for her at the moment. Too many bad memories. Too many photos of just her siblings covering the walls, showing how she was erased from the family over the years, or rather, never really part of it. She was already having enough trouble sleeping, as she kept having nightmares of what she did to Allison in the cabin, or to her brothers in the theatre. More than once she had woken up and accidentally cracked her mirror with her powers. Spending the night at the Academy might make the nightmares worse. So she said goodbye to her brothers outside of the police station and hailed a cab to take her home.

She was awoken by the sound of cabinets closing in her kitchen. Someone was in her apartment? Vanya’s heart started to race. Someone had broken in. Okay, control, control she thought. She focused on the sound of her heartbeat, and brought her power forth. She took a deep breath control…

She was glowing slightly when she opened her bedroom door and turned the corner to face the intruder.

“Shit! Vanya!” Five blinked out of the kitchen and into the living room, putting some distance between them so she could see who it was before attacking.

“Five! What are you doing? I could have hurt you!” she exclaimed.

“I didn’t mean to wake you. And you still don’t have locks on your windows, do you? You wouldn’t have thought I was an intruder if you had locks on your windows!” delaying the question of what he was doing. 

“Why are you sneaking around in the middle of the night?” she snapped, she almost hurt him and he wasn’t even telling her why he was there.

“I’m not ‘sneaking,’ I’m just making a cup of coffee.” He deflected.

She was processing what he said. That didn’t make sense, there was coffee at the Academy now, he didn’t need to come to her apartment to make coffee…

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.” He said as he started to head to the door.

“No, wait, Five, I’m sorry!” she called after him, taking a few steps towards him until he stopped and turned towards her.

It didn’t make sense because coffee was just his excuse to be here. As a master assassin that he so claimed to be, he could have made a pot of coffee without a sound. He said he didn’t mean to wake her, but… he did. While Five had no problem talking about facts and theories at length, he did have trouble talking about anything personal. It was one of the reasons he came off as so arrogant. If he cared about something, he had trouble expressing it, and often resorted to relegating his expressions to facts and logic which often made him come off as cold. As kids, Vanya learned to pick up on his cues for when he needed to talk or just be around someone, as he rarely asked for help. And that his longwinded reasoning was just a way for him to say he cared about something. Five was here because he wanted to see her. 

“Please, stay!” she pleaded, “I’m sorry, I was just scared when I thought someone broke in, and then I was scared that I almost hurt you.”

“It’s okay, Vanya. You didn’t ‘almost hurt’ me. I can at least avoid someone who’s half asleep.” He replied.

“No, it’s not okay. You’re here, and that’s not how I wanted to-“ what were the words she was looking for? “That’s not how I wanted to treat you. I’m sorry.” She didn’t want him to leave, she didn’t want to lose him again. 

“You need to stop apologizing, Vanya.” He said exasperatedly.

“No. I’ve missed you so much, Five! Ever since the day you left, I missed you every single day! Wondering where you went, hoping you were okay. And then you came home, and you acted like you were fine in front of everyone but then you came to me for help that same night and I just… I was dismissive. You told me where you were, about the apocalypse… and instead of being there for you I just questioned whether it was real. I walked away and said we’d talk in the morning. Which was just incredibly insensitive after everything you just told me.” Tears were running down her face now, “I wasn’t there for you when you needed me. And I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry I should have believed you! Because it was you, that should have been all the proof I needed. And then at the theatre I almost killed you!”

“Vanya…” he said, and took a step towards her. He looked surprised, he wasn’t used to people expressing that they care about him. He had disappeared from his siblings lives twice now, and so far each time he has reappeared he had been met with either blame or a cold shoulder.

“Then in Dallas, I left you when you asked me to stay.” She said, recalling how she stormed away from him after Luther told her she had caused the apocalypse. “And then later, you came to find me when you found a way home. And I… I blamed you, which was completely wrong, all you had been doing was saving us time and again. Usually saving us from me. And then I – I threatened you.” 

She was horrified at the memory of powering up against Five, having a stand off in the road. She had hated it when her siblings used their powers against her growing up. And she did that to Five, threatened him, her best friend, when he was just trying save them all again.

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t remember, I didn’t remember you, I didn’t remember how much you mean to me, how much I love you! When you showed up saying we had to leave, I blamed you for everything! I said it was your fault we were stuck there! But it wasn’t! It was my fault, I destroyed the world and you saved us! You kept saving us over and over again and you didn’t deserve how I treated you! I haven’t been there for you, and I’m so sorry. But please, please don’t leave! I love you, and I don’t want to lose you again!” She finished.

He stepped forward and gripped her shoulders. He figured he should speak up and stop her from spiraling any more since she had broken the dishes in her sink.

“Vanya, it’s okay.” He looked her in the eyes, “you’re not going to lose me again. I promise.”

She sniffled. She was so fortunate to have him in her life, to have her bestfriend back!

“Can I hug you?” she asked.

Five usually avoided physical contact, which is why she asked.

“Yeah.” He said, and she immediately lurched forward to envelop him in a hug. He wrapped his arms around her to hug her back. It was the first time he had been hugged in over 45 years. He didn’t realize how much he needed it. They stayed like that for a while; neither wanted to make a move to be the first to end it.

“I love you.” She said again.

Five took a moment to gather himself so that his voice would be even before saying, “Same, sis.”

They eventually broke away and Five walked straight to the kitchen before Vanya could see his face. Vanya took the cue and went to the bathroom to blow her nose, giving Five time to blink away the tears so they wouldn’t be seen. He wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but he had been hurt that none of his siblings seemed to have missed him, or seemed glad to see him when he returned. Twice. At least Vanya had said that she didn’t want to lose him again when he showed up bloodied at her apartment… but she didn’t believe him about the apocalypse and he couldn’t let her slow him down. What a mistake that ended up being. In Dallas, Luther, Diego, and Vanya had even blamed him for the situation they found themselves in. Even though he had warned them before they jumped that he couldn’t say for sure what would happen. But at least he had saved their lives. He wasn’t looking for happiness, his goal had always been to save his family and stop the apocalypse (which was directly related to the saving his family part). But it was nice to have at least one of his siblings say that they loved him.

Vanya returned and pulled her coffee from the cabinet, starting a fresh pot. Five then saw her pull out two mugs and was secretly pleased at the indication that she would stay up with him, even for just a bit, before going back to bed.

What do they even try to talk about? Vanya couldn’t recall them having a single conversation in the past few weeks that didn’t involve the apocalypse. She wracked her brain for a topic that wasn’t going to be a sore subject. The coffee finished brewing.

“Do you want blue or purple?” she asked Five. He looked at the mugs, assessing them both.

“Purple.” He decided.

They sat at her kitchen table, sipping their drinks.

“Have these past few days been like, the calmest for you in weeks?” Vanya asked.

“Despite the multiple crime scenes, yes.”

“How has your old man heart been keeping up with all the stress?” she joked.

Five smiled into his mug, he appreciated the acknowledgement that he wasn’t a child.

“I guess I’m younger than I look.” He joked back.

The two sat together for hours, occasionally talking, but often slipping into comfortable silence. Just happy to have the other back after so many years.


	4. Last words & Trainings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shattering Dad's stuff is therapeutic, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: drug mention

Allison was on the phone with Vanya, recounting the day Five found her and Klaus in Dallas. The two sisters had been telling each other how they had found their family, or, how their family found them. Allison had already described how she had discovered Klaus started a cult and found him in a mansions swimming pool, and that she had randomly ran into Luther at a BBQ stand. Vanya recounted how Luther was the first to find her at the farm, and how extremely confused she was when a man walked into the barn and was speaking to her as if he knew her. And that Five found her in a cornfield the morning after the assassins tried to kill her. The sisters had a good laugh about the insane situations their family kept finding themselves in.

“… so Five just blinked right into my kitchen. I think he wanted to make a dramatic entrance. He did scare the daylights out of Klaus and I. Klaus was hiding from his cult, and I already had the police break into my home and beat my husband once that week, so we were both jumpy. But we surprised Five, too! You know that face he makes when he’s confused and is trying to assess what the hell is going on? He definitely did not expect to find Klaus and I together with a blender full of booze at 9am!”

She could hear Vanya laughing through the phone.

“Why did you guys have a blender full of booze at 9am?” she eventually asked when she had finished laughing.

“It had been a rough night. Ray thought I was some kind of spy planted in the movement, and he didn’t come home. And Klaus, he said he fell off the wagon, and it sounded like he got his heart broken.”

“Wait, he fell off the wagon? So Klaus was on the wagon at some point?”

“I guess.”

“For how long?”

“I didn’t ask. It didn’t seem like the right time. Salt to the wound and all.”

Vanya pondered that information. Klaus was sober at some point in Dallas. Why? He had been in and out of rehab for years. Why did he get sober then? And what happened that he fell off the wagon? The call was nearing its end when Allison heard the bell for her front gate.

“I’ve gotta go, I’ll see you next week.” She told Vanya. She was going to fly down for the reading of Dad’s Will, and for Five’s court appearance to be declared legally not-dead. “And we should totally have a sister night! With sweatpants!” she added. The call ended and Allison looked at her gate camera. She saw someone she didn’t know on the screen, but they were holding up a business card showing that they were a lawyer, or maybe pretending to be one. She didn’t see a camera so maybe it wasn’t paparazzi. She pressed the intercom.

“Hello?” she said.

The person on the other side introduced themselves, and claimed to be there to fulfill a Will request.

“Nice try. My fathers Will hasn’t been unsealed yet.” She was about to mute the intercom.

“No, ma’am it’s not your father’s- this might seem strange because I clearly know who you are Ms. Hargreeves, but are you Mrs. Allison Chestnut?” 

Allison felt lightheaded. She never thought she would hear that name again. She pressed the gate button to let him in. She stood on her front porch with her arms crossed as he got out of his car.

“How do you know that name?” she asked. 

He was carrying a box, with a piece of paper on top. He looked down at the paper, and then back at her, almost in disbelief.

“Are you Mrs. Allison Chestnut?” He asked again.

“Yes.” She answered. 

“A Mr. Raymond Chestnut left very specific instructions, that this be delivered to Allison Hargreeves, but only after April 2nd 2019, as the instructions note that only after that date would you answer to Mrs. Allison Chestnut.”

Ray…

“If you would sign here please, ma’am.” He asked, still looking at her in disbelief. She signed and took the box inside as he drove off.

She opened it and saw their wedding photos, newspaper clippings, trinkets from their life together. But at the top was the book, Jules Verne “From the Earth to the Moon.” She opened it, and there was a letter inside.

“Allison-  
I bet you thought you had the last word.”

The letter went on. Ray wrote about how much he loved her, how much he cherished the time they had together. How he continued the movement. He wrote about the lives of their friends, everyone from Odessa’s. How he watched the Umbrella Academy make their debut. How strange it was to see the love of his life live in a different time. He told her to keep up the work for the movement. And he loved her, he loved her, he loved her. Pages and pages of Ray telling her through time that he loved her.

Allison cried as she carefully removed every cherished item from the box. She had found true love. How cruel that they didn’t belong in each other’s time, that they had to fit a lifetime into two years?  
_________________________________________________

April 5th 2019 Friday  
_________________________________________________

“Just, try to focus.” Luther said, as he tapped the glass again. 

Vanya focused on the resonance of the glass Luther just tapped. She was trying to break just that one glass, not the others, just that one. All of the glasses on the left side of the table violently shattered and Luther covered his face with his arm.

Today was the first day of her new training. And so far it was not going well. They had all looked through dad’s journal at some point over the past few days. Five thought it may be good to start where she had left off when she was four, breaking wine glasses in the foyer. They wanted to see if she could gain precision and control, without someone yelling at her this time. Five and Klaus nominated Luther to be the one to make the glasses resonate, as he was the most likely to walk away okay if Vanya’s aim missed.

“Sorry!” Vanya said with a worried look, as Luther grabbed the nearby broom to sweep the glass up (again).

“It’s okay, you’re not going to be perfect after just a few hours.” Five assured her. He was standing in the hallway that led to the library, Klaus slightly behind him.

“Yeah, you did it a few times already!” Klaus added, trying to cheer her up. She had managed to break only one of the glasses a few times, but she wasn’t sure if it was due to actual accuracy or a fluke.

Vanya took a few deep breaths, but she was getting frustrated. None of them had to worry about destroying the world if they didn’t get their powers under control. She felt the beginning of a headache as Luther laid out new glasses.

“Space them further apart this time.” Five ordered. Luther sighed at him but did what Five suggested.

“Alright, remember, focus.” he said while looking at Vanya, and tapped a glass when she nodded.

The sound resonated in the foyer, Vanya closed her eyes and focused in on it, using the sound of the glass to find it. She heard the glass shatter in front of her. Just one glass this time, she did it! She heard the front door open and Diego’s voice shouting that he was late, and asking what he missed. It startled Vanya, who still had her eyes closed, and she shattered the rest of the wine glasses on the table.

She opened her eyes and saw the others glaring at Diego, who was still standing in the entrance assessing the situation.

“Shit, sorry.” He said.

Vanya stared at the broken shards of glass on the table. She messed up, again. She couldn’t mess up like this just because of a distraction! Distractions were everywhere! And she could do a lot worse than just break a few glasses.

“You almost had it that time.” Luther said, as he brushed off the glass. “Your aim’s getting better.” He added, as he reached for new glasses from a box under the table.

“I need a break.” She said, she felt the headache getting worse.

“You’re so close, just a few more –“ Luther started.

“I said I need a break.” She repeated.

“You can’t quit now, we’re so close!” The glass in his hand shattered. He looked at the broken stem he was still holding before turning back to Vanya. She looked scared.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to, it was an accident!” she was scared and was about to cry. She turned and hurriedly walked out of the room, leaving her brothers in the foyer.

Luther watched her disappear, gave a deep sigh and said “Shit.”

“Give her some time, she’ll come around.” Five said, and then blinked out of the room.

“What have I missed?” Diego asked again.

“Vanya steadily going through dad’s impressively large supply of wine glasses.” Answered Klaus.

“Vanya trying to learn control and aim.” Luther corrected as he swept up more broken shards. Klaus rolled his eyes and walked out of the room, leaving Luther and Diego alone. Diego noticed the trashcan filled with broken remnants of the training.

“How long have you guys been at it?” he questioned.

“I’m not sure, a few hours I guess. She can do it! She did it a few times, she just needs to focus.” Luther then started to ramble on about training plans at length.

Something had Diego concerned, but he wasn’t sure how to bring it up. He didn’t think Luther had left the house at all except for the concert and the police questioning the last few days. He was also pretty sure one of the reasons Luther was so invested in Vanya’s training was because… he didn’t know what else to do. He knew Luther considered himself a leader, that it was core part of his sense of self. But he had lived nearly his whole life, except for the year in Dallas, following dad’s orders. And then in Dallas, he had tried to go straight back to dad, only to be rejected. He almost immediately found a surrogate father in Jack Ruby. Like Dad, Ruby used Luther for gain through fighting and protection. Luther had practically recreated his old life, complete with living in a single bedroom at a boarding house for solitary men. Diego didn’t want his brother to slip into that lifestyle again. But he wasn’t sure how to make a man who thought he was a leader, actually take lead of his own life.

“You’ve been focusing pretty hard on this training the last few days, haven’t you?” Diego asked.

“Obviously, it’s important. Dad really messed up, and Vanya’s counting on me – on us.” Luther corrected himself at the end. He had finished sweeping up the glass and started to head towards the library. Diego followed him.

“Yeah, well, Vanya needed to take a break. Maybe you do, too.” Diego was trying to word this carefully. “Get out of the house, clear your head. There’s a barbecue place nearby that’s pretty good, not like what we had in Dallas, but still pretty good. How about you and I grab dinner there tonight?”

Luther seemed confused by Diego’s suggestion, but ultimately agreed.

_________________________________________________

Vanya settled herself in the attic, trying to calm down. The attic was usually the safest place growing up, dad didn’t have as many cameras up here. Vanya sat down and leaned her back against a box. She wondered if any of the boxes contained the belongings she left behind when she moved out. Her siblings’ rooms had all been preserved like time capsules. Hers was destroyed, erasing any sign that a seventh child once lived in this house. No, she couldn’t think about that, she needed to calm down so she didn’t hurt anyone.

Vanya put her head between her knees and focused on her breathing, in and out. She wasn’t sure how long she had been there when she felt someone gently nudge her foot. She looked up and saw Klaus standing in front of her. He motioned to the space next to her, silently asking if he could sit. She nodded and looked down at the floor again. She felt him sit down next to her.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

She wasn’t sure how to answer, so she stayed quiet.

“What’s wrong?” he asked gently.

“I keep breaking more glasses.” She said to the floor.

“Yeah, because you’re learning. You’re not going to be great at control over night, Vanny.” He was trying to coax her out of her funk, using the nickname he knew she secretly liked. It would often get a smile out of her when they were kids. She rested her head against his shoulder, and he felt a small victory.

“I hurt Luther.” She added.

“Big guys fine, he didn’t even get a scratch.” Klaus assured her.

“It could have been worse. It could have been a lot worse.” 

“But it wasn’t. And accidents are going to happen. We know that, we’ve all messed up.”

“My mess-ups can destroy the world!”

“You’re not going to destroy the world again.” He said as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

“You don’t know that.” She said, finally looking at him.

“Yeah, I do. Because you didn’t mean to do it the first time. And we’re not even going to go into Dallas, because that was not your fault. That was poor international relations.” He said while raising a finger, stopping her before she could argue.

“Vanya, you didn’t mean to blow up the moon, you just had a bunch of - whatever energy thing you have - built up, and then you got knocked out and it just went – “ he made an explosion sign with his hand “- it was an accident.”

“That’s worse, Klaus. Destroying the world by accident is worse.”

“No, it’s not. Because you weren’t evil about it, you didn’t have… malicious intent.” He said, finally finding the words he was looking for after a few moments. “My sister, who used to cry when we stepped on ants when we were kids-“

“It was mean, they didn’t deserve to be killed-“ she interrupted before Klaus cut her off.

“- would not destroy the world on purpose. You’re just not that kind of person, Vanny.” 

“But if I did it by accident, I could do it again.” She said. The fact that she could destroy the world scared her, that it was an accident scared her even more. She felt like she didn’t have control.

“Maybe, but I don’t think you would do it by accident again. We all had a pretty shitty time that week. But you were coming down from a 25 year high and didn’t even know it.” She looked at him questioningly, so he continued, “you stopped taking the medication you had been on nearly your entire life cold-turkey. And, from what you described how it felt when you stopped, that stuff had really numbed you. For the first time, you started to feel emotions fully. Good ones, yeah, like happiness, but also bad ones. With all the shit you found out in just a few days, of course it would be overwhelming. And how we reacted to you that day made it worse.” He had both arms wrapped around her in a hug now.

Klaus felt drops of wetness on his shoulder and realized she was crying. 

“Thanks, Klaus.”

“Anytime.” 

They sat like that for a long time. Her head was still on his shoulder, and Klaus kept one arm around her. 

“Klaus, can I ask you something?” Vanya spoke up after awhile.

“Sure.”

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

“Okay.” He said, now unsure of what she would ask.

“Allison mentioned that when you showed up at her house, you said you fell off the wagon. How long were you on the wagon?”

“Oh, only a few miles, it was a really old wooden wagon, not very comfortable, but quite quaint.” He lied while staring straight ahead, talking as if he had told Allison about a literal wagon.

“Okay.” Vanya said. She wasn’t going to question him further on this if he wasn’t comfortable talking about it. She would accept the lie if that’s what he needed.

He was quiet for a while, contemplating if he wanted to tell her. He decided.

“Three years.” He eventually said.

That surprised Vanya, she lifted her head off of his shoulder to look at his face.

“Three years?” she asked incredulously. He had never even come close to being sober for longer than a month when they were teenagers.

“Don’t give me that look.” He said exasperatedly, looking away from her, he didn’t want to see the inevitable disappointment that came into people’s faces at the mention of relapse. “That streak is long broken now.”

“No, it’s just, three years…” she did the math, and a very sad thought crossed her mind. “You don’t have to answer … Klaus, did you think we were dead? Did you stay sober to… try to see us?”

Klaus didn’t answer, he kept staring ahead but Vanya saw tears start to form in his eyes and he gripped her shoulder a bit tighter. That was all the confirmation she needed. She wrapped her arms around him in a hug again, and put her head back on his shoulder. 

_________________________________________________

The next few days of training went better. Luther and Diego had come up with a plan to place the glasses all around the room, and Diego would toss things into them from afar to make them resonate. Vanya preferred this method much more, as the odds of her hurting someone by accident had greatly decreased if they weren’t standing right in front of the target. They had progressed to adding distractions in the form of Klaus dropping books from the balcony at random times.

They were making quite a bit of noise, and at one point Pogo walked in to see what was going on. Five blinked in front of him just in time to stop him from walking right onto broken glass.

“Not a good idea to walk in here without shoes on at the moment, Pogo.” Diego called from the balcony.

“We’ll clean it all up when we’re done.” Vanya added, but she was looking a foot to the right of him rather than directly at him.

“I see.” He said, looking at Vanya. “Is… training going well?”

“Yeah.” Luther said from the hall between the foyer and the library.

“It’s good to see you again, Miss Vanya.” He was still looking at her, but she was avoiding his eye. From her peripheral, he looked sad. She gave him a small nod, and he left.

Her relationship with Pogo at the moment was difficult to say the least. He had helped Dad drug and lie to her. He still believed she should be drugged. But growing up, she really did believe that he loved her. And she loved him. She still loved him. But that made what he did hurt even more. But Dad raised Pogo, too. And she tried to reason his actions, that he had been raised to not go against Dad, to believe that whatever Dad did, even if terrible, was justified by the end results. Dad had raised him, but as a servant rather than as a child. Even making Pogo refer to him as his master. Dad had abused Pogo too, even if Pogo refused to acknowledge it. Vanya wasn’t sure if she could ever forgive him, but she knew she could never hate him.

_________________________________________________

The siblings had been checking in on each other more over the past week than they had in years. Allison made it a habit to call them everyday, even if they only had time for a quick hello. Vanya would stop by the Academy, after practice on days when she didn’t have students, for training. She noticed that while Klaus had resumed drinking, she hadn’t seen him take any harder drugs. She wondered if he was avoiding the harder stuff, and if she could offer help (or if that would set him in reverse). Diego was subtly trying to get Luther out of the house more, and would try to get Five or Klaus to join them if he saw them. If Luther was in a particularly depressed mood, Diego would ask him to go to the gym and spar under the guise to help him practice for an upcoming fight. After awhile the gym became one of the places Luther felt comfortable to not wear long-sleeved shirts at all the time. Vanya noticed that Five would sometimes show up at her apartment without waking her. After decades in an apocalypse, he had forgotten that trash is thrown away in this time. She would find his preferred purple coffee cup left out, and occasionally sandwich ingredients left on the table. She made sure to stock up on coffee and marshmallows, and also chamomile tea in the hope that he may choose that instead of caffeine in the middle of the night.

Allison flew down on Thursday morning. They were all going to Five’s hearing the next day, and Allison wanted Thursday to see her family. She stopped by the police station first, with her lawyers, to give her statement like her siblings had. She then went to the Academy first to see Klaus, Five, and Luther. She wanted to see Five and Klaus, but she also needed to have a conversation with Luther.

After she had received the letter from Ray, she knew she needed to talk to Luther, and that it was going to be hard. But when Diego had mentioned in one of their phone calls that he was trying to prevent Luther from falling into his old habits, she knew she had to have this conversation sooner rather than later. She couldn’t let Luther live in the past.

She wouldn’t deny that they didn’t have… something when they were kids. But, they had been raised in isolation from the world. And she grew up. And with Ray… she knew what really being in love was like. She couldn’t let Luther hope that he would be more than a brother to her. She needed to tell him, so he could move on.

It did end up being a rough conversation. But they both needed to acknowledge that they were not going to happen, and move on.


	5. Sweatpants & Rumors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Allison and Vanya finally have their sister night

The two Hargreeves sisters were wearing sweatpants and were sprawled on top of Vanya’s bed. They were finally having their sister night, complete with chocolate covered raisins. Vanya had at first been hesitant, saying she would understand if Allison didn’t want to spend the full night in her run-down apartment. But Allison insisted that she loved the place. And she did, because it was Vanya’s. Everything in it was her sisters’, which she had accumulated over years of hard work, from the high-backed chair, the shelves filled with sheet music and books, to the cracked bedroom mirror. She wanted to be in the home her sister created.

They had been talking for hours about everything and nothing. How Vanya was going to start therapy again, how Allison was close to getting visitation. Over time, some of the tougher conversations were breached. 

They finally had a conversation about the rumor that didn’t end with Allison’s throat being slashed. Allison said she had forgotten about it when they were kids, and only recalled it when things started to click into place when she saw Vanya with powers at the cabin. She apologized for what she did to her. Vanya apologized as well, for lashing out at Allison for something Dad made her do when they were kids. When the truth first came out, Vanya had blamed Allison, thinking she did it so that only she would be the special daughter and Vanya could be pushed to the side. Now that she had time to process things (and wasn’t coming down from years of mood altering medication), she saw it for what it was. Their father using Allison as a weapon, having her do something she couldn’t understand, and that would hurt her sister for the rest of her life. Vanya also apologized for how she treated Allison the rest of that week, too. Allison had kept making efforts to reconnect with her, and look out for her, and Vanya had repeatedly chosen a near-stranger-who-turned-out-to-be-a-serial-killer over her sister each time. And had sliced her throat, leaving her for dead. Allison may say that she forgives Vanya for that, but Vanya would never forgive herself for what she did. For what kind of person she showed she was in that moment. She didn’t deserve Allison’s forgiveness, but Allison… Allison was always so full of love, was always the bigger person, and almost always chose the path of kindness. Vanya recognized her act as unforgivable, but was resolved to be a better person – a better sister that Allison deserved.

“Vanya,” Allison said after a bit of lighter conversation, preparing to breach the next heavy topic, “why did you write the book?”

Vanya knew this question would come up sooner or later, and she was dreading it. She took a deep breath.

“I…I was never part of the family. I was never acknowledged. The rest of you… you were, all of you, always included in everything. Even outside of the mission meetings that I wasn’t allowed to attend, even just ordinary stuff, I wasn’t included. You always had each other you were always… a family.” 

Allison listened to her sister. She couldn’t deny that they had all excluded Vanya. Allison saw it in the home security footage Pogo showed her. And then they had all read Dad’s journal, and had proof that he had intentionally orchestrated to encourage them to exclude Vanya, to keep her isolated.

“I wasn’t even allowed in the family portraits. I remember when I told dad he forgot me; none of you even moved a muscle to try to include me, you wouldn’t even look at me. When he said he didn’t forget, I realized I wasn’t supposed to be included… I was there but I wasn’t part of the family. The walls in that house are covered with your faces, newspaper articles about you, interviews. It is a monument to the six of you!” Vanya was crying now, and her voice was getting higher as she fought through it. “Even the interviews you all gave… you would all only say that there was six of you. You even gave an interview just talking about what it was like to be the only girl in the family. I was completely erased!”

“Vanya, we had to, Dad wouldn’t let us mention you. He said… he said that if people knew about you it would put you in danger.” Allison said.

“And you believed him? That that was the reason why?” Vanya asked. Allison didn’t answer. While safety may be one reason to not mention their ordinary sister, Allison always figured that Dad’s real reason was because he would be embarrassed if it was known that he had an ordinary child. Now, she knew Dad’s reasons had been more malicious. To isolate her, and if god forbid she ‘disappeared,’ only they would know. Vanya continued. 

“There was nothing that showed that I was your sister. There was nothing to show that I was part of the family! I was left out, ignored, or erased every time. There is still nothing in that house that would show that I ever even lived there with you all! There’s not a single photo of me! Do you have any idea what that feels like? That place is a time capsule for the six of you, and I … it’s like I didn’t even exist. When I wrote the book… I had given up on hoping that any of you would acknowledge me. But I – I wanted something that would show I was part of the family, that I was your sister. And, if you all already didn’t care, then I would make it public, since you were all known publicly as a family then I would be too. And I…” This next part was hard to admit, she took a shuddering breath, “I wanted to hurt you. Since I felt hurt by all of you, I wanted to hurt you all back publicly so that you would actually care this time. Because, hurting you seemed like the only way that would make you pay attention to me for once, and be forced to – to face what you did to me instead of ignore it. I wanted to hurt you.”

Allison was surprised by that acknowledgment, that she had intended to hurt them. Yeah, the book hurt, mission accomplished. But Vanya had claimed before that she was just being truthful when she wrote about the intimacies of their personal lives for all to read.

“I’m sorry about that.” Vanya continued, she had an arm draped over her eyes, she couldn’t look at Allison while she admitted the next part; “It was mean, and you all didn’t deserve that. I was angry, and hurt you all intentionally. I was so focused on what was done to me, how I felt… that I didn’t consider what you all had gone through, too. That you were all… just kids. That a lot of what you did… was because of Dad, his rules, what he said, what he did. You guys were… trying to survive in that house too. And I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t mean much after all the damage I’ve already done.”

Vanya felt the bed shift as Allison crawled over to her. She braced herself for Allison to say that she was awful, that she would never forgive her for the book. Allison gently grabbed her arm to remove it from her eyes, forcing Vanya to look up at her. Allison was crying.

“Thank you for- for telling me why you wrote it.” Allison said, “And I’m sorry, too. For how I treated you when we were kids. For not… being a good sister. I wish – I wish Dad didn’t do what he did, I wish he didn’t exclude you, have us exclude you. I wish we could have been closer. But I want us to be closer now! You’re my sister, and I love you!”

Vanya looked up at her crying sister in disbelief. Allison still wanted her, she didn’t hate her. Allison still loved her. Vanya gave a strangled sob as she lurched forward to hug her sister.

“Thank you!” she mumbled into Allison’s hair, “I love you!”

After some time the tears stopped, and the two lied side-by-side facing each other.

“Have you been able to see Claire again?” Vanya asked after some time had passed.

“No, I’m still trying to get regular visitations, but I’ve talked to her. A lot. Patrick hasn’t been as… combative when I’ve asked to talk to her lately. So that’s good.” Allison answered. Vanya gave her a small smile, trying to show she was happy for her.

“There’s something else I wanted to tell you. Ray… sent me a box. From his Will. He… I knew he passed away years ago. One of the first things I did after seeing Claire when we got back was try to find him. He arranged it so that it would be given to me after we got back. After I would know I was Allison Chestnut.” She had tears in her eyes again, Vanya reached out and squeezed her hand in support. “It was filled with our memories together, and a letter. He really did get the last word.”

“I’m sorry you lost him.” Vanya said, “But I’m also really glad that you had each other. Even if it wasn’t forever, I’m glad that you had someone like him in your life.” Vanya wasn’t sure if that was the right thing to say, but it was honest. She was glad Allison had someone who truly loved her, and who she loved in return, even if just for a short time.

“Me too.” Allison said with a small smile. “He really was the love of my life. Everything before…I realize it wasn’t… it just doesn’t compare. With Luther… I don’t think that would have been a thing if we weren’t so isolated from the world. I realize that I love him, but I’m not in love with him. And with Patrick… I wanted him to love me. Like with everything else in my life before, if I wanted it…” she trailed off.

“If you wanted it…” Vanya repeated, waiting for Allison to finish her sentence but also worried about how she thought it was going to end. When Allison didn’t answer she asked “Allison, what did you do?”

“I rumored him to love me.” Allison confessed, “I used to use my powers to get everything I wanted. And it ruined my life. He hates me now, and I lost custody of my daughter.”

Vanya knew that Allison stopped rumoring people, she had only used her powers a few times since and that was to save lives. And once to make Diego punch himself. She was proud of Allison for that, for knowing that she had so much power, was raised to use it freely and without consequence, but choosing to no longer abuse it. She couldn’t imagine how hard that must be for her sister, but Allison said that it felt good to earn what she had. But something Allison said concerned her, and she had to ask.

“Did you undo it? The rumor? After the divorce?” Vanya asked.

“What do you mean? Patrick hates me, he’s not in love with me anymore.” 

“Allison, you alter reality.”

“What are you getting at, Vanya?”

“You alter reality.” Vanya was trying to word this carefully, she didn’t want to hurt Allison, “Even if he knows that it was a rumor that made him fall in love with you, he can’t… he can’t change that reality back.”

“But he hates me now, there’s no way… Vanya there’s no way he still…” she trailed off, realizing what her sister had said.

“Even if that’s true, the reality the rumor created is still also true. Both realities can exist.” Vanya said gently.

“Oh my god.” Patrick was still in love with her. Because she altered his reality. She had to make this right, she might hate him right now for separating her from Claire but he didn’t deserve to live like – OH SHIT. Another realization struck her. 

“Vanya,” she reached out and cupped Vanya’s face with her hand, Allison’s face looked scared, she had to ask but she was terrified of the answer she knew she would receive, “you don’t still think that you’re ‘just ordinary’, do you?”

Vanya’s lip began to tremble, she was on the verge of crying again. “It’s a reality to me, I can’t change that.” She eventually answered.

“I can undo it!” Allison said hurriedly, she was sitting up now, “I’ll undo it! I’m so sorry Vanya! I didn’t know it was still – that you still-“

“No!” Vanya replied, sitting up as well.

“What? Vanya if you still think that, I need to undo it! I did this to you! I can’t let it keep hurting you!”

“Allison, no! Listen to me! You can’t-“

“Yes I can Vanya!”

“IT’S NOT SAFE!” Vanya shouted. Allison looked taken aback by the outburst. “It’s not safe, Allison. I thought about it. With everything else that’s going on, trying to control my powers, undoing the rumor is not safe!”

“It’s not safe for you to not think you’re ‘just ordinary’?” Allison said with a bite of frustration. Why wouldn’t Vanya let her help her? Let her make this right.

“No. It’s not.” Vanya answered her, her voice more even now, more under control. “Allison, what if you undo it and I go on a power trip?”

“You wouldn’t-“

“I could. You know I could. I need to get this under control. Before we can even consider undoing the rumor. And even then… the wording has to be so careful.”

“Vanya, you –“

“I don’t give you permission to rumor me.” Vanya stated. If nothing else, she knew Allison would honor that.

They stared at each other. Vanya’s face was determined, Allison’s was heartbroken.

“I – I want you to know that I don’t think you’re ordinary, Vanya. I think you are so special, so incredible, and talented!” 

“I know.” Vanya said, holding her sisters hand and giving her a smile. “I know because that’s how you treat me. You treat me like I’m special. Two realities, both are true. I just need to hold onto one of them for now, as a safety net. Okay?” 

Allison nodded and wrapped her sister in a hug.

“The moment you no longer need that safety net, you tell me! Promise me.”

“Promise.” Vanya answered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My take on what "I heard a rumor that you loved me" meant when Allison was driving to the cabin in S1.
> 
> I know in the comics she had rumored Luther to love her but the tv show is different (and also just no, I am not here for incest).
> 
> Short chapter because I felt this deserved its own. 
> 
> These sister love each other but suck at communicating! I just want them to be happy!


	6. People who are legally alive need to sleep

April 12th Friday 

The Hargreeves siblings all sat before the Judge who was reviewing Five’s presumption of death, and would rule to overturn it. One of Allison’s lawyers, Abby Phillips, was with them.

Ms. Phillips at first thought it would be good when she heard that all of the siblings would attend. Showing a strong family support system to a Judge who had to also rule on what age Five should be considered. She shouldn’t have gotten her hopes up. Luther looked ragged, as if he barely slept, Vanya and Allison had both clearly been crying despite their best efforts to hide their puffy eyes, and her main client that day, Number Five Hargreeves, seemed ready to murder someone after Klaus had referred to the hearing as “Five being declared a real boy.” Klaus was now very jumpy as he was the most likely one Five would attack if it came down to it. Somehow the vigilante Diego, who had to leave a ridiculous number of knives in his car before being allowed to enter the building, seemed the most normal.

The Judge quickly overturned the presumption of death, declaring Five legally alive. There was no doubt it was Five, not only by appearance but because no one else but him could do a spatial jump.

Where Five had been for the past 17 years was left vaguely as ‘traveling through time and space.’ He had not been kidnapped, and was home safe and sound now. The age… was a separate issue.

“I told you, my consciousness is 58.” Five said again through gritted teeth. 

“Mr. Hargreeves, be that as it may-“ the Judge began.

“Just because I look like a child I should not be declared one! I’m older than you!” Five had very much lost any sense of calmness and was standing up while yelling at the Judge. His age was a touchy subject for him. Vanya reached out and placed a hand on his arm. He looked down at her, and sat back down.

“Mr. Hargreeves, that is not the issue. My concern is declaring someone a different age then what would be calculated based on his or her date of birth. I will not be setting a precedent for that. Therefore, your age will be based on your date of birth, not your appearance or your consciousness. So you are…” He started punching numbers into a calculator, “…29 years, 6 months, and 11 days old.” He slammed his gavel on his desk. “Now all of you are dismissed!”

**************

The siblings celebrated Five being declared a legal living adult by having dinner together in the kitchen. They all preferred the kitchen over the formal dining table. Growing up, the kitchen would be where they had breakfast, a meal that Dad was not present for so meals were much more relaxed. It struck Five that the last time he had dinner with his family was the day he ran away and got stuck in the apocalypse. Having them all with him, and alive, was something he didn’t want to step away from. So he made an effort to calm his temper and not say anything too rude that may set one of them off, and just shot a Klaus a glare when he joked that Five would have a legal ID but still would never find a shop that would sell him booze. He was surprised when Allison came to defense by jabbing an elbow into Klaus.

“Not the focus of tonight!” Allison said. She knew Five struggled with his appearance, and didn’t want Klaus to dive further into the joke.

“Yeah,” Luther chimed, “it’s been a long time since we’ve all been together like this.” Diego looked ready to correct him and Luther looked at him pointedly and added “without being on the verge of a life-threatening disaster.”

“Fair enough.” Diego conceded. 

“Yeah, sorry about those guys, I’m really working on my anger issues now.” Vanya joked.

Klaus snorted into his drink. It was funny. But he was also surprised to hear Vanya be able to joke about what happened, and not be depressively scared of herself. It was a good sign that she was slowly doing better. The others seemed to pick up on it as well.

“Good,” said Luther, “I think Five could use a break from trying to save our asses all the time.” 

He was trying to give a small acknowledgement of appreciation, knowing that Five had saved them multiple times. Luther had thought that it was just a hero complex Dad had bestowed on all of them, until he met Adult Five in the Pub back in Dallas. Then he learned that it wasn’t a hero complex at all, it was Five trying to find a way to save his family for decades, always trying to get back home to them every single day, being stuck in an apocalypse but worrying about his siblings lives instead of his own. Luther didn’t know Five had cared about them so much, but realized that Five showed that he cared about people in different ways rather than just saying it out right. He was trying to be nicer to his brother, but it was new territory and he wasn’t always sure how.

“Yeah, thanks for coming back for us – how many times has it been now?” Diego asked Five. He was also trying to not be a jerk to him as often after he found out that Five really did love all of them during their night of crime scene clean up.

“You don’t want to know.” Five answered, focusing on his dinner. He couldn’t look at any of them right now, as he was feeling extremely uncomfortable with them acting supportive.

It was a good evening. None of the arguments that broke out were severe enough to cause any of them to storm out. The night wound to an end and they went to their rooms. They were all staying at the academy that night, since Dad’s Will was going to be read in the morning.

********  
April 13th Saturday

The siblings sat at the dining room table, instinctually taking their usual seats without a second thought. The estate attorney sat at the head of the table, which used to be Dad’s seat. Allison’s lawyers had un-officially become the family lawyers, and sat in the two seats next to the estate attorney that were usually empty. None of them were ever allowed to sit right next to Dad, he had always kept space between them. 

The Will was quite short. The Attorney explained that what took so long was the fact that Dad had referred to them as their numbers. From a legal perspective that was an issue, until he had discovered that their numbers had been their legal names, and their human names were their aliases. There was further issues when it was found that Luther, Klaus, and Five were still legally named Number One Hargreeves, Number Four Hargreeves, and Number Five Hargreeves as none of them ever legally changed their names. Five was perfectly fine with that, as Five was his name. Luther and Klaus however would be changing their names as soon as possible. Allison, Diego, and Vanya had all changed their names as soon as they had moved out of the Academy.

The Attorney began stating that Sir Reginald Hargreeves left his estate, businesses, and all other properties to the surviving members of the Umbrella Academy. Said members were to serve on a board of directors with each other, that would oversee all enterprises. The contingencies being that the Umbrella Academy building be maintained, and that Pogo received the resources to maintain his lifestyle.

Vanya was acutely aware of the wording Dad chose. From the look Five gave her, and how angry Allison looked, they had both noticed as well.

“Is that it?” Luther asked. “Seems simple enough.”

“It does go on.” The Attorney said, sending an apologetic look straight down the table towards Vanya. She gave him a shrug to let him know that she had expected this, and he shouldn’t worry.

“Number Seven, being completely ordinary and with nothing special about her, is not a member of the Umbrella Academy. I have already provided her with the education she would need to live a satisfactorily ordinary life. She does not require the same resources as her extraordinary siblings, and therefore shall receive nothing.” The Attorney finished.

“Wait, what?” asked Luther.

“That’s bullshit.” Diego added.

Klaus took a long swig of his drink.

“It’s quite clear. Vanya is not considered a member so…” the Attorney looked nervous.

“Guys, it’s just like everything else with Dad, it’s not surprising.” Vanya said while looking down.

“It’s not surprising, but it’s wrong!” Allison said from down the table.

Ms. Phillips and Mr. Jameson looked at each other, realizing that this would become another Hargreeves family mess if they didn’t think of something.

“If the five of you are to oversee everything as a board of directors,” Ms. Phillips cut in, trying to diffuse the situation before it got out of hand, “You could simply take up the positions and vote Vanya in as a member.”

Mr. Jameson turned to the Attorney, “Is there any clause that would prevent that?” he asked.

“Um, no, it doesn’t say that the board of directors can’t be changed or added to, just that the surviving members of the Umbrella Academy are to join it. There’s nothing that would prevent someone else from being voted in.” the Attorney said.

“Good, then that’s what we’ll do.” Diego said. The others agreed.

They had all agreed to work together to oversee everything that Dad had left. It was tempting to destroy everything he had created over his life, but they decided against it for a few reasons. The first being that Reginald Hargreeves’ businesses employed probably tens of thousands of people, and none of them wanted to ruin someone’s livelihood just to spite their fathers’ memory. The other being that Dad was definitely into a lot of nefarious stuff, and they were going to try to find out as much as they could and shut it down. 

One of the first decisions they made was to put the law firm Ms. Phillips and Mr. Jameson worked for on retainer. Making them the official lawyers for the family (or at least the most trusted), as the siblings simply could not trust any of Dad’s legal representatives. 

************************

Vanya was awoken by the sound of someone in her kitchen. She groggily called out;

“Five, is that you or a burglar?”

“Why would you ask that if you thought there was a chance it was a burglar!?” Five yelled from the kitchen, annoyed by her lack of self-preservation.

Vanya rolled out of bed and walked into her kitchen to see Five making coffee.

“Well, if you didn’t answer I’d guess it was burglar. And if it was I bet they’d be more surprised than me if I sent them flying.” She said while yawning.

“That would only work out if you had enough awareness of the situation to use your powers in time.” He said tightly.

Vanya was grabbing mugs out of her cabinet and was about to respond, when she noticed how tired he looked.

“Five, when was the last time you slept?” she asked.

“Why?” he asked.

“Because you look exhausted.” She sighed.

“Doesn’t matter.” He responded.

“What do you mean? Is something wrong?” She asked.

“What? No. Why would something be wrong?”

“Because you’re clearly not sleeping. So I’m wondering if there’s another apocalypse, if you’re being hunted by assassins, or if there’s some other project you’re up to that’s causing you to not get sleep.” She answered, leaning on the counter and looking at him.

“No, we’re safe.” He didn’t mean to worry her or make her think their family was under attack again.

“Then why aren’t you sleeping? Why are you trying to stay awake?”

“This is normal, Vanya. 45 years in the apocalypse and a few years as a time assassin, and your sleep schedule is messed up.” He tried to assure her. That was true, it was hard to maintain a regular schedule under such variable conditions. But sleep also usually came with nightmares of what he went through, which he preferred to avoid. He poured his coffee into the purple mug she offered him, and followed her into the living room. He was surprised when she took the chair, that was usually his seat, but settled himself on the couch without comment.

“Did you and Allison have a nice sleepover?” he asked. He was glad that his siblings were finally getting along with Vanya, she seemed happier. Or maybe that was just because she was no longer on the medication. Or both.

“Yeah. It was nice. We talked a lot. We still have a lot we both know we need to discuss, but the big stuff was- was addressed.”

“Big stuff?” 

“The rumor, the book, some other things.”

“Are you two good?”

“Yeah,” Vanya’s mouth twitched into a smile, “I mean, there’s a lot to unpack. But, we love each other, so it’s worth it.”

“I’m glad.” Five’s face had a soft expression.

“What about you, how have you been?” she asked.

“What do you mean?”

“Life without an apocalypse, and everything else.”

“I’m fine.”

She wouldn’t call him out on the lie, doing so would just push him away. His sleeping and eating habit were hectic to say the least, and he always seemed to be working on some equation or another but would brush it off when any of them asked what he was working on. She waited for him to finish his coffee before she grabbed the blanket off the arm of her chair and approached him.

“What-“ he started.

“You are going to try to sleep.” She stated.

“I’m not a child, Vanya!” he realized now she had made him sit on the couch as a trap. 

“I know, you’re acting like a grumpy old man.”

“Fine.” He said, reaching for the blanket. He thought she didn’t learn?

“Nope, not falling for that again.” She said, sitting down at the end of the couch and putting a pillow next to her leg. She reached for his shoulder to lie him down. “Last time you pulled that you just walked out.”

“Vanya I do not need to be put down for a nap!” he spat, resisting lying down but losing. They both knew he wouldn’t blink away from her. He knew that she hated when they used their powers against her, so he never did that. If they argued, he wouldn’t blink away from her, or use his power to follow her if she tried to leave. Even the last time he left after tricking her into believing he would stay, he had used the door out of habit.

“It’s not a nap, it’s sleep. A necessary function.” She said as she threw the blanket over him and draped an arm over his chest to prevent him from sneaking away. “Just try to rest, Five. Please.”

He was about to retort, when she started running her hand through his hair. And it felt incredibly comforting. He recalled that when they were kids, she would do this for Ben. If he was really upset, Ben would hide in Vanya’s room because that was the last place anyone would look. Five would sometimes blink in and find him there. She would let him lie on her bed while she ran a hand through his hair, telling him kind things she thought about him, and that he wasn’t a monster. If he was crying, she would play the violin so the others wouldn’t hear him. If Five heard her playing with her door closed, he would blink in and sit with Ben too. The three of them had been a bit closer to each other than the others; they were 5-6-7 after all. The tail-end of the family, the three at the end of the table. 

He felt his eyelids grow heavy. He didn’t have it in him to fight it. He didn’t want to. He was safe, he wasn’t in the apocalypse, his sister was with him, and the feeling of her gently running her hand through his hair felt nice. Five drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy 2021 everyone! 
> 
> 2020 - wtf was that


	7. Shopping, Coffee, & Threats

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Allison loves her family and they love her

Allison called letting her family know that she would fly in for another visit in a few days. She was juggling all the demands of her life in LA; her career, custody, publicity, and therapy amongst other things, while also trying to be present in her siblings lives (and have them in hers). She had spoken to Luther and Klaus, and it was now Five’s turn.

On the phone she informed Five that they, the two of them, would be going to a shop whom she knows the owner of to get him some non-Academy clothes. She said it as a statement, not an offer, not giving him a chance to decline before saying she had to go and ended the conversation.

Five was annoyed, he was an adult, he could dress himself! She didn’t need to treat him like a child! He was pacing in the kitchen ruminating over his thoughts and planning to avoid the shopping activity at all costs when Luther walked back into.

“What’s got you so agitated.” He asked.

“Nothing!” Five spat back at him.

“Sure, totally seems like nothing. Did you hang up on Allison?” He had been hoping to talk to her again.

“No, she said she had to go and hung up. After saying that I needed new clothes and that we were going to go shopping she’s here.” He sneered at the word shopping, which piqued Luther’s interest.

“So? Isn’t that good? You can get some pants and not wear shorts all the time.” 

Five stopped his pacing, glared at his brother, and blinked into his room to resume his pacing in peace. They all still saw him as a child! He was older than all of them! He didn’t need someone to dress him! He had taken care of himself and survived for over 45 years!

“Five, what’s wrong?” Luther was standing in his doorway.

“I don’t need a babysitter, Luther! Just go!”

“Why are you upset that Allison wants to go shopping with you?”

“I am a grown man! I can dress myself! I don’t need any of you to treat me like a child!” Five yelled.

“No one’s denying that, despite your attitude.” Luther replied.

“You don’t act like it! I don’t need any of you to try to parent me! I’m older than all of you!”

“Can you take your head out of your ass for a minute. She wants to spend time with you, Five.”

That stopped his pacing. He turned to face Luther.

“What? She’ll be here at the Academy, we’d be here, spending time.” Five said a bit confusedly.

“She wants to spend time with you, Five. For something that doesn’t involve an apocalypse, or hunting a murderer, or anything else mission-like. Would it kill you to hang out with your sister without a mission?” Luther asked.

“Why would she want that?” Five was genuinely confused. He had to fight tooth and nail to get his siblings to work with him before, they couldn’t seem to be bothered to be near him despite the impending apocalypses. Why would she want to be around him now?

“Because she missed you.” Luther said slowly, unsure if Five really couldn’t see the obvious.

“No, that’s not…” he trailed off.

“Five, we all missed you. You don’t think it was just Vanya who cared when you disappeared?” Luther asked, searching Five’s face for a hint of what his brother was thinking. Five looked confused, trying to piece together what Luther just said as if it were a puzzle.

“Five, we’ve all missed you. When you came back the reunion was definitely awkward all things considered, but… Jesus did you really think only we didn’t miss you while you were gone for 17 years!” 

Five’s surprised face showed him that he did think that. Granted, their family wasn’t the best at showing affection but Luther had always thought that they all knew they loved one another.

“When you left, we would sneak out and search for you every night for months! All of us! Dad put up the portrait in the library and gave us a lecture about your memory! He wanted to put a stop to it so he made it clear to us that you were gone unless you chose to come back, that we… that we couldn’t bring you back. But… none of us stopped trying to find out what happened. Allison would try to rumor you back home, she’d talk to thin air until her voice went hoarse. She ended up in the infirmary so many times for overusing her power because of it.”

“I didn’t know.” Five said in a low voice.

“Yeah, you just thought Vanya was the only one who missed you. We all missed you, we all tried to find you. We tried to guess what you would look like when you got older and keep an eye out for any suspicious reports, any missing persons that might meet your description. Do you have any idea how scared Klaus was when he saw you fall from that portal looking 13? He thought you were a ghost!”

“Sorry, I …”

“So if one of us is trying to spend time with you, we’re not trying to treat you like a child, even though you act like one most of the time! We just missed you!”

“Okay.” Five was still processing a lot of the information, and couldn’t think of a better response.

“Can you spend an afternoon shopping with your sister? Who is just trying to be nice to you?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. Okay.” Luther wasn’t sure how to end this conversation; Five wasn’t yelling or arguing with him so this was an unusual conversation for them, “Good talk.” 

And with that he walked out of the room, leaving Five with his thoughts. They missed him? They didn’t act like they had. But then again, all Hargreeves were shit with their emotions. They searched for him, for years! They missed him…

****

Allison arrived Monday afternoon, and told Five she had scheduled them for a Tuesday late morning appointment. She looked surprised when he didn’t argue, as if she had been expecting some kind of fight. But she quickly recovered, and explained that the shop owner was a friend of hers who allowed private appointments on Tuesday while the shop was usually closed for inventory and restocking. It would just be them and maybe a few employees.

They arrived at the shop the next day at a back alley entrance. Allison knocked on the door and after a short wait it burst open.

“Allison!” A man with wavy brown hair exclaimed; this must be her friend, “So glad to see you on this coast!”

“Hi Peter, thanks for fitting us in on short notice.” His sister replied.

“Not at all, not at all!” he said as he looked at Five, “You must be Number Five Hargreeves! Do you prefer Mr. Hargreeves or Number Five?” he asked as he ushered them into a back hallway of the shop.

Five appreciated the acknowledgement, but also didn’t want Allison’s friend to have to address him formally, especially since it sounded like he was doing her a favor on short notice.

“Just Five is fine.” He replied.

“Excellent! So, not sure if your sister has given you the rundown yet, my name’s Peter by the way, but we allow for some private appointments on most Tuesdays; basically you don’t have to deal with the hubbub of the general public so long as you’re chill with us doing inventory and updating a few things while you’re in the store. Since it can look a bit un-kept while we update, we generally only allow these appointments for some of our preferred customers, or friends.” He explained as they followed him down the hallway and past a curtain to the main store.

Oh, Allison had chosen well. It was filled with formal and sophisticated clothing. Blazers, sweaters, button down shirts, shorts, pants, and suits for all occasions and accessories. None of that graphic-tee bullshit of teenagers. An employee had a series of mannequin torsos in front of her in the corner of the store that she was dressing with what must be some of their newer designs.

“Today we have myself, Matilda over there, and Jacob in the back. Over here we have-“ 

Peter gave them a quick tour of the store and introduced Matilda to them as well. Five quickly realized why Allison had chosen to take him here; it was safe. There were limited people and it was closed to the public, so he wouldn’t be on edge scanning the face of every new comer as a potential threat. The atmosphere was relaxed and friendly, with the employees more focused on their tasks than on him, giving him the freedom to roam and choose without feeling hovered over or… or be treated like a child. Allison and Peter usually talked amongst themselves (Five learned they became friends when Peter was the costume designer for one of her films) while sometimes throwing out suggestions or compliments to various pieces so he didn’t feel like they were too focused on him, making him less self-conscious of perusing the store for clothes for a body he was still not quite used to.

Allison seemed to have coached Peter beforehand to not ask why the brother she shared a birthday with looked like a teenager, or ask where he had been for 17 years. Everyone spoke to Five like an adult, which he appreciated.

Five was now in a back dressing room, Allison waiting outside while Peter had left to help Jacob with inventory but told them to shout (literally) if they needed anything.

“Why are those pants a ‘maybe’? I thought they looked nice!” Allison called through the door.

“They’re a bit long.” Five answered.

“So? Catch the vibe Five, anything in this store can be tailored! And also, what does it matter? You’ll grow out of them in like a month if you don’t get them a bit long.”

Five opened the door, back in his Academy uniform.

“What?” Five asked.

“You may not be a teenager but you’re growing like one.” She explained as she leaned against the wall. “When you first landed you were shorter than Vanya, now you’ve got about a good inch on her.”

“I hadn’t noticed.” He answered honestly. He still wasn’t used to this body, he hadn’t realized it had been growing.

“How tall were you the first time around?” she asked with a questioning look.

“Hard to gauge a comparison. First time around there was toxic ash and poor nutrition that likely impeded my growth.” He explained. 

Her face fell a little and he felt like kicking himself. She was trying to be nice, don’t be a prick! He told himself. Any attempt at recovery was halted when Peter reappeared. 

“How’s it going?” he asked.

“Good! We were just discussing how soon he might grow out of some things.” Allison said, her face and voice back to their cheery expressions.

“We can make adjustments for a bit if you outgrow something. Or, if there’s something you like and just want a bigger size over time you can always come back, or just send us your updated measurements and we can mail it to you.” Peter explained.

“Great,” said Five as he started detailing what he wanted and their necessary adjustments. They made arrangements to have everything delivered to the Academy. The price didn’t really matter; their family was billionaires after all.

They left and Allison said she wanted them to get lunch at a nearby café. Despite Five trying to not be a prick, he visibly hesitated. A café would mean crowds, and eating in front of people. Eating around others was a vulnerability, a weak point, coupled with a public space-

“Come on, its got great coffee and a lot of vegetarian dishes.” She said.

Oh. She noticed that. While Five would eat meat if it was on his plate (he would never take food for granted and did not waste it), he tended to avoid it if possible. After 45 years of surviving on whatever he could; canned goods he could scavenge, vegetables he could grow, or bugs he could catch, meant that his digestive system did not tolerate meat when the Commission took him out of the apocalypse. Now that he had a body that never went through all of that, he could stomach it again but preferred not to. He didn’t think his siblings had noticed, he was still trying to get used to eating around people and they rarely saw him eat anything besides a fluffer-nutter sandwich.

“If you want to, fine.” He said.

“I do. Let’s go.” She said.

They sat in the back of the café. Five had his back to the wall and clear line of sight of the entrances and exits. And Allison had her back to the dining area to reduce the chance of someone recognizing her. The meal was awkward; neither of them really knew what to talk about. Five took a sip of his coffee.

“How’s the French press?” she asked him, trying to find a topic of conversation that wasn’t loaded with trauma.

“It’s good, very strong. And, uh, thank you, this was uh nice.” He said, trying to let his sister know that he appreciated her thoughtfulness.

“I’m glad.” She said with a smile, “To be honest I thought you would argue against hanging out. That’s why when I first told you I stated it as a fact and not an option, didn’t want to give you an opportunity to talk your way out of it.” She confessed.

“Meh, you turned out to be good company.” He replied.

“Wow, such high praise!” she joked as she took another bite of her food.

“And your suggestions were useful-“

“Ever analytic.” She interrupted.

“I hadn’t been paying attention that this body had been growing.” He continued.

This body. Not his body. The distinction wasn’t lost on Allison.

“Hey Five,” she said almost hesitantly, “I get that you don’t like the fact that you’re not showing your proper age, that your body is your younger one. I can’t imagine what that’s like, or how frustrating it is. You sacrificed a lot to get back to us.” she looked down at her Umbrella tattoo on her left arm and absently rubbed her thumb over it as she continued, “Our scars aren’t always pleasant, but they show what we’ve been through.”

She and her siblings all had plenty of scars. Most she tried to hide, but each one was a memory of what she had been through. Proof of the life she had lived. She easily could have had the tattoo removed, but chose not to. She lifted her eyes from her arm to look at her brother.

“And it sounds like you went through hell everyday. Surviving the apocalypse, breathing in toxic ash, probably did a number on your body. I guess what I’m trying to say is, as someone who loves you I’m glad you get another go in a body that doesn’t carry those burdens.”

That was a kind way to put it, thought Five. Admittedly, she was right, his older body was in poor health. He had no expectation that he would live for long with his old lungs or liver. He thought that after averting the apocalypse he might have a decade with his family, maybe attend some of Claire’s science fairs, before he could finally die in peace knowing he had saved them. A miscalculation threw that plan out the window, and he has to live even longer now. He wasn’t sure how long he was lost in his thoughts before he realized Allison was still looking at him, waiting for some kind of reaction to see if she had offended him.

“Um, thanks.” He settled on.

“And you’re stuck with us for longer, you don’t get to check out so soon old man.” She said with a smile as she drank her coffee, clearly relieved that his reaction wasn’t negative.

“So long as that timeframe includes meeting my niece at some point.” He said, returning to his usual nonchalant tone. 

“I’d like that. I know she would too.” Allison said.

******

Later that evening they were back at the Academy. Allison was on the phone in the kitchen, talking to Claire. Most of the other siblings were upstairs either helping or watching Vanya’s training. After about 10 minutes Claire found out that Allison was calling her from the Academy and demanded to speak to whichever Aunt or Uncle was nearest; which was Diego. 

Allison had very quietly but sternly warned him to not take up too much of her phone time with her daughter as she passed him the phone.

“Whatever do you mean?” he asked with a sly grin, and she realized he was not going to give up the phone until Claire was sick of talking to him. She rolled her eyes at him but Five blinked into the kitchen, saying she was needed upstairs, before she could give a sterner warning. Five stayed in the kitchen, busying himself with making a fresh pot of coffee.

Diego spoke to his niece for a few minutes. He asked her about school and her friends, she asked him for stories about missions. He was telling her about one of their safer missions (Allison would not appreciate him telling her daughter anything gory or scary).

“And what did the ghost tell Uncle Klaus?” She asked over the phone.

“Well they told him-“

“Dad, no! It’s just getting good!” He heard her say but her voice was getting further away, as if the phone was being taken away from her. A new voice was heard over the receiver.

“Allison I told you not to tell her those stories anymore! You need to stop making yourself out to be a hero that you’re not!” He heard a mans voice. This must be Patrick.

“Listen up, here’s what you’re going to do;” Diego said in a menacing but quiet voice, “first, you are going to make sure my niece is out of earshot of this conversation.”

Five was listening intently to the side of the conversation he could hear.

“Excuse you? Who do you think-“ Patrick started.

“This is Allison’s brother, Diego, asshole. Now make sure Claire is out of earshot. We’re going to talk about how you just spoke, to who you thought was Allison, in front of her daughter. Claire does not need to hear this and if you try to hang up I will find you.”

There was hesitation. Patrick was probably weighing his options; he wanted to hang up, but had probably heard enough about Diego to know that he would make good on his promise to find him.

“Claire, can you go pick up your toys in the living room please?” He heard Patrick say, and then after a few moments, “Okay, listen, my daughter does not concern you-“

“Shut the fuck up and listen you spineless piece of shit. That is not how you are going to speak to Allison, her mother, in front of Claire. That is not the kind of example you are going to set as a man in front of that little girl, do you understand me?” Silence… “I said do you understand me?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Now you are also never going to speak to my sister like that ever again as well. You have no right to say she isn’t a hero. Even without powers that woman is a goddamn hero. Despite all the shit she has been through, she is a genuinely kind and caring person, and she is always trying to help people and do the right thing! That is a hero! I read that interview you had released at the time of our Father’s funeral. The things you said were vile. To say those things not only for the public, but for your daughter to hear! Do you think that sets a good example for your daughter on how a man should treat her?”

After a moment of silence;

“No.”

“Good, we’re in agreement there! And do you think it’s okay to exploit your daughter to hurt her mother?” Diego continued.

“I did not-“ Patrick tried to say.

“Plastering your daughter’s face on a magazine cover with the words ‘Patrick to Allison: We’re doing fine’ is exploiting your kid and that’s abusive as hell. Believe me, we have plenty of experience with an asshole father exploiting his kids. So I’ll ask again, do you think it’s okay to use your daughter as a tool to hurt her mother?”

“No, but Allison rumored her! That’s-“ 

“Don’t you fucking dare try to compare the two! Allison had no malice behind what she did. And she has acknowledged her mistake and has been doing literally everything she can, and everything that is asked of her, to make it right. What you did was malicious to Allison, exploitative of Claire, and abusive to both of them. And I swear to god if you don’t start treating my sister with more respect I will find you and you can take a guess of what will happen. So are you going to shape up and start acting like a decent person?” More silence, “Do not make me repeat myself, Patrick.”

“Yes, I’ll uh, be more respectful.”

“Good.” Diego said. Five was gesturing for the phone. Diego had finished anyway so he passed it to him.

“Diego hit the key points but my warning is going to be less vague.” Five said into the phone, “Allison has more – lets call it morals – than the rest of us. She is not inclined to use some options that are available to our family. That lack of inclination does not apply to the rest of us. If you publicly say anything negative about her again, I will make sure that our family’s wealth is used to take you to court until you are bled dry and your name thoroughly smeared. If you say anything negative about her in front of her daughter, I will kill you. Any questions?”

“No.”

“Great, now try to be a better person and a better role model for your daughter. Or else.” Five finished and handed the phone back to Diego.

“Now, give the phone back to Claire. I need to finish the story of how her mom saved 8 people when she heard what the ghosts told Klaus.” Diego said.

“Yeah, um, hang, Claire!” 

Diego heard his niece’s voice and he continued with the story. Allison had only been gone about five minutes before she returned. Diego quickly finished and handed the phone to her. He and Five left the kitchen so she could have privacy while she excitedly spoke to her daughter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really wanted Five to have clothes that weren't the UA uniform, the uniform is like a physical way to keep him stuck in the past.
> 
> No joke Allison is such a good character; she's such a kind and hard working person, she deserves all the good things! I really hope in S3 and beyond she gets more recognition for her efforts, she works so hard to do what's right.


	8. Progress and Precautions

Over the weeks the siblings had slowly, and tentatively, become more of a part of each other’s lives than they had before. Putting more effort into being a family. Diego would sometimes pick Vanya up after practice to give her a ride to the Academy for training. Allison and Diego had encouraged Luther to take a more active role in Dad’s businesses that involved space, Hargreeves Enterprises, as Luther was still quite interested in the study of space even after living on the moon for 4 years (a lot of the employees found his insight and experience fascinating, and kept wanting him to talk about the various studies he did on the moon). 

Luther and Five had started to actually use the greenhouse on the roof as a greenhouse. Luther spent years on the moon taking care of his sole companion: a tiny plant he had grown from a seed, and he rather liked having the room for more plants. Five had spent years in the apocalypse growing his own food, and viewed a well-maintained garden a staple to survival. The two of them often found themselves checking on their plants together. Luther’s side filled with beautiful and fragrant flowers, Five’s side filled with herbs and vegetables.

Klaus would try to be around Five if he saw him alone. He knew Five was usually annoyed by him, but his siblings were always annoyed by him. That didn’t stop him from trying to help them when he could (pulling Diego away from gunfire, looking for a drunk Luther at a club, dragging Allison away from some very violent and racist cops). Klaus also recalled that Five was practically addicted to the apocalypse after obsessing about it for decades, and seemed a bit lost without it. And Five also didn’t seem to know how to be around people without there being a purpose (planning to stop imminent death, family meeting, or Vanya’s training). So Klaus would often knit or read in the library if he saw Five in there reading or writing equations. Sometimes Luther would join them, too.

Klaus was also aware that Vanya was trying to get closer to him. She would suggest that Klaus and her go get coffee sometimes, or check out a new shop. She, like Five, also wasn’t use to being around people. Being social did not come easy to her. But Klaus thought it sweet that she was trying. And they would sometimes drag Five with them if they could find him.

Luther was another introverted sibling. The difference being that unlike the others, Luther lived nearly his entire life under Dad’s authority (and then surrogate-daddy-mobster-Ruby for a year). He was still figuring out how to be his own person, and Klaus took it upon himself to try to get Luther out of the house more often (though not back to any clubs after the first experience; Klaus did not want to see bike girl again).

They had attended some of Diego’s fights, even Allison who flew in when she could. After the first fight, Luther had made sure to get Diego a much more comprehensive first-aid kit. And Vanya would usually stop by to see him the morning after a fight on her way to practice, with a pastry from Petrola’s bakery (which they used to go to as kids) because a raw egg didn’t count as breakfast. She kept it up even though he claimed he didn’t eat junk food. Blueberry muffins and cranberry scones had fruit in them, so they didn’t count as junk food according to her. She used pastry delivery as an excuse to make sure he was okay.

Allison still called her siblings almost everyday, often just to say hi and check in. But she spent hours talking to them the day she announced she had finally earned visitation with Claire every other week. She had to give a play-by-play of the judgment to each of them over the phone.

The six of them had also been working on weeding through Dad’s various businesses and relations. Looking for anything nefarious to shut down (there were quite a few) and also what they should continue. The numerous charitable organizations and donations that weren’t fronts would continue (they weren’t delusional, they knew Dad did that for tax breaks and favors and not out of the goodness of his heart). They expanded the charitable work, adding donations to numerous community outreach programs, equal rights organizations, and groups dedicated to helping victims of child abuse to name a few. They did so through shell companies, so that it would be hard to tell where the donations were coming from and they would remain anonymous. They did not want Dad’s legacy to receive credit for this, but they also didn’t want to receive credit for just spending his money. For the nefarious plots, Pogo, being the one who was most familiar with Dad’s work over the years, had helped them sort through a lot of this. While he still spoke quite vaguely in order to protect Dad’s legacy, he would still indicate any files he felt they should ‘look over.’

The siblings were no longer suspects in any of the murders that took place before the concert. Detective Beeman had separately confided in Diego that their current theory is that Jenkins had tried to get close to Vanya to hurt the rest of them. The man clearly had a grudge against the Umbrella Academy, and had killed multiple people already. With how brutal his murder was it was likely a revenge killing from someone who knew one of his victims. Jenkins likely had planned to kill Vanya at the cabin; to make headlines the day of her concert that her superhero siblings couldn’t save their ordinary sister from him. Beeman said it was a good thing that they had all shown up and gotten her when they did. She may not have survived if Jenkins got there first. Diego was glad that they were cleared, but was also struck cold by the thought that Beeman may have just described Jenkins original plan. If Jenkins hadn’t found the journal, hadn’t learned of a different way to use Vanya, would he have tried to kill her?

Vanya’s training on control had progressed, even managing to not set off the ‘kill’ sensors on some test dummies, and they felt she was ready to start practicing on using more of her power. However, doing that in the Academy, in the middle of a city, wasn’t the best idea. They had all given a lot of thought to the issue, and all came to the conclusion that they didn’t want to suggest given Vanya’s previous training attempt with Jenkins. But having her practice in the woods, where it was secluded and no one would be around, was probably the safest option. Luther and Diego found a secluded cabin on a large plot of land that would give them plenty of space and privacy. So the Hargreeves estate purchased what was essentially a small forest a few hours outside of the city. Allison had flown in as they were all going to go there that weekend to start on the next part of Vanya’s training.

Vanya was very worried about using more of her power. Using more than what was needed to break a few glasses, or send a practice dummy across the room. She was worried about what could happen if she lost control. This was exacerbated by the nightmares she kept having of when she nearly killed her family. So with that in mind, when they were all in the Academy the night before they left, she raided the infirmary for the items she would need and gathered her siblings in the library.

“You all need to be prepared to stop me if I get out of control.” She stated bluntly.

Her siblings looked at her questioningly. Luther took the lead and started to speak.

“No, it’s not going to be a repeat of the theatre, Vanya, you’ve gotten much better at control and –“ Luther started.

Vanya lifted up a bag and dumped her infirmary stash onto the table. They all stared as the chloroform, numerous sedatives, and her old medication tumbled out.

“Blowing up the moon was an accident. Killing an entire floor of FBI agents was an accident. I can’t have that kind of accident with any of you! If any of you think that I’m about to lose control, or hurt someone, you need to stop me!” she looked at them all earnestly. 

“Vanya, none of us are going to kill you! We couldn’t!” Allison was angry.

“I’m saying ‘stop me.’ Getting knocked-out seems to stop me from manipulating sound waves. But if I have too much energy stored up, like at the theatre, it can be…bad, so you all need to be careful. In Dallas, a hit to the head knocked me out and that stopped me, or at least, no one around me died as far as I know. And at the FBI, I was draining an agent when I got chloroformed from behind. They were both still alive when I woke up, so I don’t think that I caused an explosion or anything.” She explained. 

To the others, it was depressing to hear Vanya talk about how she should be knocked unconscious, and how she had been attacked before. Yeah, they had attacked her at the theatre, but they didn’t know what else to do. There was a lot happening all at once, and they had always learned to solve their problems with violence. But Vanya wasn’t a ‘problem,’ she was their sister. None of them wanted to do to her what she had just described. Vanya continued talking. There was more? Shit…

“And… if I’m like how I was before,” she picked up a bottle of her old medication, “you have to keep me unconscious so I don’t hurt anyone, and give me four pills a day for at least two days. Don’t let me wake up before then.”

“No! We are not doing that Vanya!” Allison yelled.

“Yeah, starting that stuff again could really mess you up.” Klaus added earnestly. 

“Agreed, we don’t know what that medication could do to you since you’ve been off it for so long. Especially at the dosage you were on.” Five stated.

“Did you all forget that I nearly killed you? I still have nightmares of what I did to all of you! I need to know that you’ll prevent me from even coming close to that again!” Vanya exclaimed.

“Okay,” Diego said, shocking the others, “if you need us to agree to knock you out if you start to lose control, if that’s what you need to feel safe, then okay. But we are not using this shit,” he said, taking the medication from her hand, “or half of those sedatives,” he added while pointing to the pile on the table, “most of those are way too strong and you know that! You need to feel safe that you won’t hurt us? Fine. But we need to feel safe that we won’t hurt you, either.”

They stared each other down. Diego hoped she would take the compromise.

“Okay?” he asked. Vanya looked around at her siblings, none of them were arguing with what Diego said, which indicated their general agreement.

“Okay.” She said after a few moments.

“Christ, Vanya, I swear if you keep stressing me out like this my hair will go grey.” Klaus said, cutting the tension in the room and wrapping her in a hug.

Later that night, when the rest of their siblings had retreated to their bedrooms, Vanya found Luther in Dad’s study, reviewing some data from Hargreeves Enterprises latest research on comets. 

“Vanya? What’s up? Everything okay?” He asked when he saw her standing in the doorway.

“I need to talk to you.” She said, but stayed in the doorway.

“Okay, what about?”

“We both know the others may not do what’s necessary to stop me if – if I need to be stopped.”

“What do you mean?”

“If I start to lose control, it will probably be up to you to – to do whatever’s necessary.”

“What do you mean ‘whatever’s necessary’?”

“Knock me out, or take me out. We both know this Luther.”

“Wait, what? Vanya, that is not what we agreed to!”

“I know, but I don’t think the others could do what may be needed.”

“You mean kill you? You think I can kill you?” he was angry and hurt that she thought that. He didn’t want to be the villain, he thought they had gotten closer over the past few weeks. How could she think that of him?

“I don’t mean it in a bad way, Luther. But I do think that you could do what’s needed to protect the others. To protect our family. And I am sorry to ask this of you. I know it’s not fair.” Her voice sounded sad, she did feel bad asking this.

“Not fair? Why do you think, out of all of us, that I’m the most likely to – to do that?”

“You put me in the chamber. And it was your plan at the theatre.” She answered, her voice was sad but determined. This wasn’t fair to Luther, she hated this, but if anyone would stop her it was him. 

“I told you that I realized that was wrong, I –“

“And at the farm.” She said, cutting him off.

“What are you talking about?” he was confused, what happened at the farm?

“When you first found me. In the barn. I know you had a gun, I heard you cock it behind your back.” She didn’t want to tell him this, but she needed him to understand.

Luther was shocked. He didn’t know she heard that, that she knew that he first came to see her with the intention to…shit, she knew the whole time, for weeks, and never told him. He needed to explain himself.

“I heard you un-cock it after we talked.” She said gently. She was hurting him, and she hated this, “But you came prepared to do what you thought may be necessary. Like with the chamber, and the theatre. I know this is selfish, and not fair to you. I’m sorry. But please, if something happens… just do whatever needs to be done to protect everyone.” 

“Vanya, I apologized for what I did to you. It was wrong, and I know that. I should have protected you when you came home. And in the barn, when I saw you, you didn’t have your memories but it was still you Vanya, my sister! I realized what I was doing wasn’t right, that’s why I un-cocked the gun. I couldn’t - I wouldn’t kill you! I am not going to resort to hurting you like that again, if anything happens I’ll find some way that protects all of us, and that chamber can never be used again I made sure of it. I don’t want to be the bad guy.” He tried to make it clear that ‘all of us’ included her.

“What do you mean it ‘can never be used again’?” Vanya asked.

“I tore the door off of it, well, Diego helped, but the chamber is basically useless now.” Luther answered. Vanya looked like she was about to cry. Did he mess that up too? He took a step towards her, “Vanya?”

“Why did you do that? What if – what if I lose control again? What if you need to…” She was crying now. She didn’t understand why he would do that.

“Because that place was awful, and you’re never going in there again. If you start to lose control, we’ll be there for you. I’ll be there for you, like I should have been before.”

Luther, Number One, the guy who would do anything and everything to keep the team safe… would look out for her. Not just protect the others from her, but protect her. He thought of her as part of the team now.

She looked up at him, and then closed the short distance between them to embrace him in a hug. Luther was surprised, this was the first time she hugged him since he had used a hug to strangle her. He very gently wrapped his arms around her.

“Protecting our family includes you.” He said.

********

The siblings took two cars to the cabin, and it was indeed as Luther and Diego described, in the middle of nowhere. After getting off the main roads they had probably spent at least 20 minutes on what could barely be considered a dirt ‘road’ to the cabin.

The cabin itself consisted of a large room that housed the living area and kitchen, one bathroom, and two bedrooms which each had three beds. Diego and Luther had found the fact that it came furnished as a plus. The others eyed the beds wearily and were glad that they had brought new sheets.

Vanya made sure her siblings had the infirmary bag within reach before they started on the new training. Once they begrudgingly showed her that they did, they began. They went a little into the forest, and she was to try to make the leaves on the trees move without toppling the trees. It was control on a larger scale. Despite causing one tree to fall, and a number of branches to break off, no one had been hurt and it was deemed a success.

As they spent the evening in the cabin the conversation turned to bears, the probability of running across one, and how likely each of them were to survive.

“No way,” Allison was laughing while telling Diego, “you would not beat a bear in a fight!”

“I could win! Bears don’t have knives!” Diego defended.

“No, but they have claws. Large claws Diego!” Vanya chipped in.

“So you all don’t think that I could fight a bear, but he can?” Diego asked, pointing at Five.

“No D, we totally think you could fight a bear, just not that you would win.” Klaus explained while taking a sip of his drink.

“And besides, Five would just blink on its back, strangle it, and blink away.” Luther said.

“Maybe not ‘strangle it’ but something along those lines, yeah.” Agreed Five.

“Alright, rundown” Klaus said as he started point to each of them, “Luther – yes, Five – yes, Vanya – maybe, she might not have the heart to do it and she would definitely be crying the entire time, Me – no, Allison – no” Allison raised her glass in acknowledgement that she would likely not come out victorious in hand to hand combat against a bear, “Diego – “ Diego looked at him, daring him to say no, “ – maybe but you would definitely get your ass kicked in the process.”

The room erupted with the siblings arguing their own predictions.

“Alright, alright,” Luther interceded, “at the rate this debate is going it’s just a matter of time before Diego goes out to find a bear. So to avoid animal cruelty, new topic.” He slapped a deck of Uno cards on the table.

“Oh, Luther, you’re trying to get us to stop arguing and bring out Uno? Poor choice.” Said Klaus.

“Not avoiding arguing, avoiding a potential bear hunt – or hospital trip. And besides, Uno is one of the few games we can all play that we haven’t banned.” Said Luther.

Monopoly, Candyland, Yahtzee, and many more games had been banned at some point during their childhood. The ban was usually either enacted by the siblings due to cheating (Diego kept rolling Yahtzee) or by Pogo due to ‘excessive violence following the end of the game’ (the Monopoly board and pieces had been thoroughly destroyed and used as weapons the last time they played it).

“What about Clue?” Klaus asked.

“Banned after Diego stabbed the board.” Said Allison while smirking at Diego.

“Five was cheating.” He defended.

“Was not.” Said Five.

“And besides, it wasn’t a game we could all play.” Added Luther. Allison, Diego, and Klaus looked at him questioningly.

“Six players only. You all wouldn’t let me play, remember?” Vanya said quietly.

Oh…

“So Vanya and I had played as a team the last time instead, and when we won Diego claimed we cheated. And overreacted.” Said Five.

“I did not ‘overreact.’” Said Diego.

“You stabbed the board and said ‘I’m about to murder Five, in the library, with a knife.’” Allison recalled.

“We were in the library at the time, and you did have a knife. So, you know, didn’t really need a prophet to figure what would happen next.” Added Klaus.

“And Pogo showed up and grounded you for threatening to kill Five. And for stabbing through to the table.” Vanya said, but she was smiling. As if she was about to laugh at the memory. It was a welcome sight after yesterdays depressing ‘stop me’ conversation, so Diego didn’t retort.

“So, Uno is something we can all play, and has not been used as a weapon.” Said Luther.

“I’m game.” Said Klaus as he sat on the floor. 

Allison sat down next to Klaus. Luther was surprised but also a little pleased when Vanya sat down next to him. He was more surprised when Five sat down on his other side and not next to Vanya, but realized why when the relentless prick kept hitting him with draw two cards.

After a few rounds and numerous threats, they called it a night.


	9. Fights & Fatigue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW mention of suicidal ideation   
> TW mention of drugs

The next day of training did not go quite as smoothly. Vanya knocked down a massive tree branch that nearly crushed Klaus. Klaus had covered his ears and didn’t move when he first heard the branch start to fall, but Diego slowed down its trajectory and Luther had caught it in time. They all walked away with just a few scrapes. But it had shaken Vanya up fairly bad, and she spent nearly 10 minutes apologizing while they assured her it was fine and they weren’t mad at her.

They returned home late in the evening, as Vanya and Diego both had work the next day. Allison stayed a few more days, as she wanted to catch up with her siblings and her next court mandated therapy session wasn’t until later in the week.

On Monday she was having brunch with Klaus, they were in a far table at the back of the restaurant to avoid Allison being recognized. She had really wanted to spend time with him, just the two of them, for a while now. Over the past few months of phone calls, and the few times they were able to spend time together in person with all of the family business, he had slowly opened up to her about the man he had told her was the love of his life while he had sat on her kitchen floor in Dallas. He had told her a few more details before Five had shown up that day. Over time he told her about Vietnam, and she had realized that Klaus had also left the true love of his life behind, just like she had with Ray.

She also knew that the past few months, like usual, he had been doing small things to make sure their siblings were okay after everything that happened. He would spend time with Five and Vanya, who usually isolated themselves, would make fun of Diego to bully him into taking care of himself (the raw eggs for breakfast thing was gross, but to also rest and not be a vigilante every night), and would ask Luther how the research with Hargreeves Enterprises was going and try to get him out of the house sometimes. But when she asked how he was doing?

“I’m fine, Allison.” He said with a convincing smile. Except she knew it was a lie. Klaus always pretended to be fine. His antics, which others usually interpreted as him vying for attention, were really just distractions so they wouldn’t see or ask if something was wrong.

“You’re a liar, and liars get their waffles stolen.” She said as she stabbed a chunk of his waffle with her fork. He gave her a fake look of outrage. “Look, losing Ray… the pain of that loss is indescribable. But talking about him, talking about what we had together, it helps. It helps make it hurt a little less.”

“I’ve told you about, Dave.” 

“You have.” She agreed, while reaching out to hold his hand, “But I’m here if you ever want to talk more, about anything. Dave, Vietnam, the cult, how you now seem to be sticking to just alcohol and over the counter stuff.” She said at the end, giving him a meaningful look. He didn’t realize that she had noticed that. He had relapsed, yes, but he hadn’t gone back to any of the harder stuff. He didn’t mention it because he wasn’t sure if he would continue that trend. “You’ve been through a lot, too Klaus. You’re always there for me, let me be there for you.” 

“If I ever want to talk more about any of that,” he said, holding her hand back, “I will let you know. Promise.”

She looked at him, trying to discern if he was lying or not.

“You better.” She said, giving his hand a squeeze. 

“Enough about me,” Klaus said, determined to change the subject, “tell me how your Hollywood life is!”

She rolled her eyes. He was being extra, so he was trying to distract her to not ask him any more questions.

“Better now that I have visitation with Claire. And, Patrick finally let me undo the rumor.” She answered.

Klaus’s eyes went wide at that news. After her sleepover with Vanya, she had told him the shocking discovery that Vanya and Patrick’s rumors were still altering how they thought, even though they knew it was a lie. She had called Patrick to apologize, and to offer to undo it. 

It took a long time for him to trust her enough to agree, but the exact wording was chosen before hand, both of their lawyers were present, it was audio recorded, and another person was put on speaker phone to listen to ensure that they could not be rumored and could verify that everything was as it sounded. 

“That’s a lot of precautions.” Klaus said when she had finished describing Patrick’s requirements.

“Yeah, well, it’s hard for people to trust me.”

“But you’re working on it.” He offered.

“Yeah.” She agreed. Patrick had strangely enough been acting more decent to her in recent months even before she undid the rumor, not friendly but decent; and they had now been getting along better after the rumor was undone. She could never undo the damage of what she did, but it was a small step towards making things right. And they could at least both agree that they wanted what was best for their daughter, so they were both trying to communicate better for Claire.

“What about V?” Klaus asked.

“She still won’t give me permission.”

“Hmmm.”

“How have the three idiots been?” she asked with love.

“Diego’s been getting Luther out of the house, which is good. He seems to be getting… maybe not used to, but more comfortable in his own body the more he gets out. And that space stuff seems to be making him happy.” That was welcoming news. “Diego is still wannabe Batman and focusing on everyone else but himself-“ 

“Hmm, wonder who that reminds me of.” Interrupted Allison.

“Shut it, missy.” Klaus warned, “And our old-man baby brother is still maintaining the meal and sleep schedule of a gremlin. But he hasn’t shown up bloody or with assassins after him, so that’s a plus.”

Klaus left out that he had, on more than one occasion, caught Five looking around as if he was somewhere else. Or, some time else. He would have a look of horror on his face and jolt back to reality if someone called his name, or touched him. He would be defensive, deny that anything was wrong, and blink away if pressed. He was pretty sure that Five was having flashbacks of the apocalypse. Klaus was familiar with PTSD, it was a real bitch.

*****

Diego had won all of his fights that night. Seven fights back-to-back and he won them all. But god, was he in pain. His head was pounding and he was pretty sure a few of his ribs were bruised. His siblings had been in the crowd to cheer him on, and he vaguely recalled them helping him back to his bed in the boiler room at the end of the night. Allison, Klaus, and Luther had left after he was settled; Allison’s flight left early in the morning and she had to leave. He remembered Vanya looking worried, saying something about a concussion. She kept shaking him awake throughout the night, but he was not completely sure if that was just a dream.

He opened his eyes a crack and saw that it was daylight. He looked around and saw Vanya curled up in a tight ball on his chair. So he hadn’t imagined that. But why the hell had she kept waking him up? Oh right, possible concussion. He tried to sit up and grunted in pain. He heard feet shuffling and Vanya was in front of him.

“Diego? How are you feeling?” she asked.

“Fine.” He said, but let out a groan as he clutched his side.

“Real convincing.” She said sarcastically as she reached to help him sit up only to have him shrug her off. She rolled her eyes and went to grab the first aid kit. 

After some effort he managed to get into a sitting position with his feet on the floor, and noticed a pile of his knives next to the couch. Vanya walked back to him with the first aid kit and a stool, which she plopped in front of him and sat down. She noticed him looking at the pile.

“You kept trying to fight us when we woke you up, so Five confiscated your knives.” She explained.

“Sorry.” He said. Five had stayed too? He hoped he hadn’t hurt either of them.

“No big deal,” She said while rummaging through the kit, “but now that you’re somewhat more agreeable, let’s deal with your face.”

“I’m fine.” He said again as she started to clean a cut above his eye, “it’ll heal naturally.”

“Diego, it’s better to clean a cut.” she said as she gently touched the scar that ran from the side of his head to his face. He gave an angry huff, but stopped arguing, so she continued the ministrations. 

“Where’s Five?” he asked.

“He went to get coffee. Or, that’s what he said, he’s been gone awhile so I’m not sure.” She answered, glancing at the clock.

“He’s not involved in some shit again, is he?” Diego asked.

“I don’t think so. I mean, I haven’t seen him show up bloodied or anything like how he used to during the apocalypses. But…” she trailed off.

“The equations?” Diego asked. 

They had all noticed. Five would often write equations but would refuse to answer what they were for, or say that simpletons couldn’t understand them. He would leave his crumpled rejects discarded on the floor or tables. Diego had thought it over many times. If Five thought they were in danger, he would have told them. So this had to be something else other than an apocalypse. Part of him felt that it may just be Five obsessively double checking his math to make sure they were okay.

“Yeah, the equations. He insists everything’s fine, that he’s fine. But everyone in this family lies when they say they’re fine.” Answered Vanya.

“He’s still adjusting. He was alone for a long time before he found his way back. Makes sense for him to fall back on his math, instead of people, to make sure everything’s okay.” Diego tried to assure her.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“Is he still breaking into your apartment in the middle of the night?”

“I wouldn’t call it ‘breaking in,’ but yeah. I don’t always wake up so I’m not sure how often. But he’s started showing up in the evenings, too.”

“That’s good. Maybe the gremlin will start maintaining a normal sleep schedule eventually.”

“Five with a circadian rhythm? Sounds fake.” Vanya jokingly said.

That made Diego laugh, which he instantly regretted as he clutched side. Vanya was apologizing profusely as she went to his fridge to grab ice. She wrapped it in a towel and handed it to him. He muttered a thanks as he put it against his side. There was a flash of blue light and Five appeared. 

“Ah, he still lives.” Five said, gesturing towards Diego while holding coffees and bags of pastries from Petrola’s. 

“Yeah, well, it’ll take more than a fist fight to kill me.” Diego defended as he took one of the coffees.

“One could only hope, the Kraken.” Five sarcastically said, using Diego’s code name, which he hated. Five knew he hated it, which is why he used it. Diego made him worry last night, so he was going to piss the jerk off. 

Beyond curving trajectories, Diego also had the ability to hold his breath indefinitely, which is why Dad made his codename the Kraken. But Diego hated using that ability, they all suspected something bad happened during a private training but weren’t sure. So that ability was unknown to the public, but Dad refused to change his codename. Vanya didn’t even write about it in her book. Diego looked ready to punch Five.

“Don’t be a jerk, you were worried too or else you wouldn’t have stayed all night.” Vanya said, trying to diffuse the situation. 

“Yeah, well, I’ve worked too hard to keep you all alive. I’d hate for one of you to die in such a pathetic way.” Five said with his usual air of arrogance.

“Pathetic? I won seven rounds back to back!” Diego said.

“Full offense Diego, that would have been pathetic compared to every other death I’ve saved you from.” He started to list off; “I’ve travelled back in time to save you all from an apocalypse, infiltrated the Commission to try to get us a lead to stop the apocalypse, traveled all of us back in time because of a new apocalypse-“

“Sorry about those.” Vanya interrupted.

“Not mad,” Five said without missing a beat as he began to pace, “saved you all from nuclear war, killed the Commissions board of directors to try to get us all a way home, rewound time to save you all from your girlfriends mother, finally got a briefcase to bring us home-“

“Wait, what did you just say?” Diego interceded.

Shit. Five didn’t mean to tell them about that.

“Finally got a briefcase to bring us home.” Five said calmly, hoping they would ignore the other thing just before that.

“No. That thing about rewinding time to save us from Lila’s mom.” Diego said while staring at him intensely.

“Nothing, don’t worry about it.” Five tried to brush it off.

“Five, what happened? And what do you mean ‘rewound time?’” Diego asked again.

“Nothing, we’re all fine, it’s not important.” Five continued to pace.

“Five,” Vanya waited for him to stop pacing and look at her before she continued, “did we die? Again?”

“Temporarily. It was just a few seconds, but I rewound time so it doesn’t matter.” He tried to downplay it. Shit, he didn’t want them to know that they had all died in the barn even if it was just for a few seconds. 

“What do you mean ‘rewound time,’ Five? Is it different from your time jumps?” Diego questioned.

“A bit. It’s new, only did it once. Instead of jumping through time, it was more like I walked back through it in reverse. So there was only one version of me when I went back instead of two.” He was hoping they would drop it if he gave them at least that much of an answer.

“When you grabbed the gun from her, you had just rewound time?” Vanya asked, recalling that day.

“Yeah, but it’s fine! We’re all okay.” Five tried to assure them. He didn’t want them to think about dying in that barn. It was bad enough that he had to remember it, seeing them fall to the ground, unmoving. Losing everyone he loved within seconds. He didn’t want to think about it, he wished he could forget.

Vanya and Diego shared a look. They had died again and they didn’t even know it. It was yet another memory that would haunt only Five. How many times had he seen them as corpses, only to alter time to bring them back again and again?

Vanya wrapped Five in a hug. He was stiff as a board and didn’t return it. Returning the hug would mean something happened that would warrant a hug, but Five had made sure that they all survived so everything was fine. It was fine. He was fine.

“You need to go,” he told her instead, “you’re going to be late for practice.”

She pulled away and looked at her brothers, worry etched on her face.

“I’ll make sure Rocky here doesn’t keel over.” Five said sarcastically. After assurances from both brothers that they would be fine, Vanya headed out.

****

Throughout the week they continued trainings with Vanya in the Academy, so she could practice on a smaller scale during the week and then try to control it on a larger scale at the cabin. She was more willing to test her powers with her siblings’ promise that they would intervene if anything happened. She had been able to lift the water in the swimming pool, like she had done at the lake in Dallas, and then done it again the following day without causing a flood by putting the water back gently this time. She had also been able to make a sound wave shield around herself like Lila had back at the farm, and practiced more non-lethal attacks on mannequins outfitted with devices to measure trauma to gauge if a hit was lethal or not.

When they returned to the cabin the training continued more intensely. Vanya was determined to have control over powers so she would not be constantly worried about hurting someone she loved. She had been a powered up glow stick for most of the past week. She was tired, but she needed to keep practicing. While she felt that she had better control, she also felt more dangerous with everything she could do. So with that in mind, she decided that her siblings also needed to practice.

“You want us to practice taking you out?” Klaus asked incredulously. Him, Vanya, Luther, Diego, and Five were standing in the forest, having just wrapped up a training session.

“You’ve all seen what I’m capable of. And at this rate, if I lose control, stopping me may not be something you could just wing.” She explained as she removed something from her backpack, which they saw was chloroform and some gauze.

“No.” Five said immediately.

“I’m getting better at this, so you all need to practice so you don’t freeze up or hesitate. We can’t have a repeat of the theatre.” She stated plainly.

“We are not practicing attacking you, Vanya!” Five yelled.

“You all promised you would stop me if I lost control! You need to be prepared for that!” she yelled back. 

There was a breaking noise high above, and Vanya realized she must have snapped one of the smaller branches. This was important! They had to be able to defend themselves from her. The headache she had been feeling for the past few hours started getting worse.

“Alright, what’s your plan, Vanya?” Luther asked, stepping in between her and Five, hoping to calm them both down.

She started to explain what was essentially hide and go seek with chloroform, she would be non-lethally powered up and they would try to knock her out. Five blinked next to her and ripped the chloroform out of her hand.

“Absolutely not!” he shouted.

“You all promised-“she shouted back.

“IF YOU WERE A THREAT! IF YOU LOST CONTROL! WHICH ISN’T THE CASE RIGHT NOW!” Five was fuming.

Diego walked over and placed a hand on Five’s shoulder, speaking calmly to try to calm him down.

“Five, it’s just to practice in case she needs us-“ Diego started.

“WE ARE NOT GOING TO TRAIN ON HOW TO HURT EACHOTHER! WE ARE NOT DAD!” He looked around at them, his face was determined, daring them to argue. “We’re not doing this.” He said, and with that he grabbed her backpack in case she had anything else in there, blinked to the edge of the clearing and started walking in the direction of the cabin.

The other four watched Five storm away, and they shared a look with each other.

“I’ll go check on him.” Klaus said, and followed after Five.

“You okay?” Luther asked Vanya as he turned towards her. She didn’t answer, she just kept staring into the forest where Five disappeared. “Hey, just uh, give him time to calm down. He probably just wasn’t expecting that and uh…”

“Acted with the emotional intelligence of a Hargreeves?” Diego filled in.

“Yeah,” Luther agreed, “he’s spent so long trying to get back to us, to save us. Doing anything like that to one of us just goes against what he’s worked so long for.”

“But it’s to protect all of you! And to protect me from hurting any of you!” Vanya pleaded.

“I know. But Five, he just sees it as hurting you. As something Dad would do.” Luther tried to placate her.

“We’ve still got a few hours of daylight left.” Diego chimed in.

“Yeah! Yeah, lets uh just continue the usual training instead.” Said Luther.

Vanya, Luther, and Diego continued the training. Vanya practiced aiming and knocking down branches, and also levitating. After about half an hour her headache had gotten much worse. She touched back down on the ground.

“Guys…” she said. Luther and Diego were deep in conversation, discussing ideas of what to practice next. Her head was pounding.

“Guys, I don’t feel so well.” Her eyes rolled to the back of her head and she collapsed on the ground.

Luther and Diego had only been paying partial attention to what she said, and it wasn’t until they heard a ‘thud’ that they looked to see Vanya passed out on the ground.

“Shit!” Luther exclaimed as they rushed towards her. “Vanya, hey, Vanya!” They tried to rouse her but she was completely unresponsive. Diego checked for a pulse.

“She’s alive,” Diego said relieved, “just out like a light.”

“Thank god. What the hell happened?”

“I’m not sure,” Diego carefully lifted his sister’s head to check for injuries and was relieved when he didn’t see any, “maybe exhaustion? She’s been powered up a lot this week.”

“Shit, I didn’t think to consider that. Let’s get her back to the cabin.” Luther said as he carefully picked her up.

****

Klaus was cooking dinner while Five paced back and forth, skulking. Klaus had quickly caught up to him in the forest and they walked back to the cabin together, with Klaus trying to calm him down and to get him to look less murderous. He got that Five was upset, but there were better ways to handle that situation besides blowing up at Vanya, especially when she had been actively trying to not literally blow anything up herself. So when they arrived back at the cabin Klaus immediately did the one thing that seems to make Five a little happy at least; make a fresh pot of coffee. The old man was now pacing the length of the room, occasionally muttering to himself while drinking his coffee.

Klaus would occasionally turn around to try to talk to Five, but then he saw something out the window that made his heart drop. Five looked up, wondering why Klaus stopped mid-sentence and saw his brothers eyes were wide and the color had drained from his face. Klaus started running for the door. Five swiveled his head to where Klaus had been staring.

Through the window he saw Luther and Diego walking towards the cabin, with Vanya limp in Luther’s arms.

Klaus had launched himself out the door and had almost reached them.

“What happened!?” Klaus yelled while running.

Five blinked directly in front of them, stopping Diego and Luther in their tracks.

“What did you do?” Five accusingly asked Luther, his face contorted in anger.

“Nothing! She just collapsed!” Luther defended. 

Five reached for Vanya’s wrist to check for her pulse, and gave an accusatory look to Diego as well, silently asking for his version of events.

“She just said she wasn’t feeling well, and then passed out.” Diego corroborated and started walking towards the cabin again. The others followed.

Once inside Luther gently set her down on her bed. While Klaus untied and removed her boots, Five very obviously checked her neck for signs of strangulation. The others knew what he was thinking.

“She just collapsed Five!” Luther stated angrily. 

“Yeah, well, you’ve strangled her before so I figured I’d check just in case.” Five spat back with a glare. Diego stepped in between them.

“She said she didn’t feel well, and then passed out almost immediately. She’s been powered up a lot this week, I think she may have just been exhausted. I say we let her rest for now, if she doesn’t wake up in a few hours we go to the Academy and have Mom take a look at her.” Diego said.

Klaus and Luther nodded in agreement, and Klaus covered her with a blanket. Five grabbed a chair and sat at Vanya’s bedside, his jaw clenched and a hand on her wrist to monitor her pulse, while the other three returned to the living room.

He sat like that for close to an hour. At some point Klaus had poked his head in, asking if Five wanted dinner, but Five just shook his head. He was running various scenarios and equations in his head. If Vanya wasn’t okay, could he rewind time far back enough to prevent this? She said she wasn’t feeling well, when did that start? He recalled when he found her in Dallas, she said all she remembered was landing in an alley, getting hit by a car, and her head was ringing. He had assumed that the headache and amnesia was due to the car, but now he wondered if it they might have been due to overexerting her powers. And that posed the question; when she wakes up this time, will she still have her memories? After almost an hour she started to stir. 

“Vanya?” Five said quietly. She opened her eyes a crack and looked at him.

“Five?” That was a relief, she recognized him. So at least this wasn’t a Dallas situation. “I’m sorry.” She continued.

“What?” He wasn’t expecting that.

“For yelling at you,” she mumbled, “you didn’t deserve that.”

Five wasn’t sure how to respond, and thankfully didn’t have to figure out how to as Klaus’s voice came from the doorway.

“Hey, you’re awake!”

“Mm-hmm.” She answered while trying to sit up. Her eyes were squeezed shut and it looked like she was in pain. She may be awake but something was still wrong. Klaus helped her into a sitting position, with her back against the wall. Once she was settled, with Klaus sitting next to her on the bed, Luther and Diego had also made it into the room.

“You okay?” Luther asked.

“Mm-hmm.” Vanya answered, her eyes still squeezed shut.

“Yeah, that’s not convincing. What’s wrong?” Diego asked.

“Headache.” She responded.

“Do you remember passing out?” Luther asked.

She nodded.

“You said you didn’t feel well right before. What happened?” he questioned further.

“Headache… and it got worse. I didn’t think I would…” she trailed off, getting words out seemed to be a struggle.

“Okay, well, now we know that’s something you should let us know about before you pass out.” Luther said.

Vanya nodded, her eyes were still squeezed shut. Luther stepped out of the room and returned with a glass of water that he handed to her. She muttered a thanks as she took a few sips.

“Maybe we should head back tonight, instead of in the morning. It’s not like we’re gonna get anymore training done, and Mom can take a look at you if it doesn’t get better.” Diego said.

“That’s a good idea,” Luther agreed, he glanced back at Vanya who was holding her head, “do we have Tylenol, or anything with acetaminophen here?”

“I’m not sure, check the first-aid kit.” Answered Diego. 

But Klaus was a bit more prepared. He reached into his pocket and handed Vanya a pill.

“Here, V, take this.” He said. Vanya took the offered pill and washed it down with a sip of water without any hesitation.

“What did you just give her?” Luther asked Klaus with a look of concern.

“Why would you just take that?” Diego asked Vanya.

“Why wouldn’t I?” Vanya asked in return.

“Because it’s Klaus, and he just pulled it out of his pocket!” Diego answered.

“Exactly. Klaus wouldn’t give me anything harmful.” She said.

“Vanya, you have no clue what it –“ Diego stopped mid-sentence, he didn’t realize he was shouting, as the glass Vanya was holding began to crack. They all stared at it.

“I’m sorry!” she said.

“It’s okay. Let’s just uh, pack up and we can head out.” Said Luther as he gingerly took the glass from Vanya.

Klaus helped Vanya pack as she was still pretty out of it. While he was carrying their bags to the car Luther stopped him.

“Seriously, what did you give her?”

“Tylenol, Luther. Just Tylenol.” Klaus said looking genuinely offended. 

They were packed and in the car within 10 minutes. Vanya was in-between Five and Klaus in the back, with Luther in the passenger seat and Diego driving. They had been on the dirt road for a few minutes when Klaus noticed Vanya was straining to remain upright. 

“C’mere Vanny.” He said as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and allowed her to lean against him. They made it back to a paved road and Vanya listened to her brothers talk amongst themselves, but wasn’t really paying attention to what was being said and started to doze off. She was startled when Klaus raised his voice and nearly jumped out of his seat;

“That isn’t an authentic ossobuco, Luther!”

A crack appeared in the rearview mirror and they all went silent.

“I’m sorry.” Vanya said when she saw what she had done, and squeezed her eyes shut.

“It’s okay.” Luther assured her.

“It was an accident.” She added.

“We know, it’s okay.” Diego said, while looking at her through the cracked mirror.

“Sorry.” Klaus said to her in a whisper this time.

“Come away from the loudmouth, Vanya.” Five said as he reached over to pull her away from Klaus to lean against him instead. She rested her head on Five’s shoulder. 

“Sorry.” She said again, barely loud enough for him to hear.

“It’s okay, no one’s mad, I promise.” He thought for a moment and then told her quietly, “V à V.” He saw her mouth twitch in a small smile.

“V à V.” Vanya murmured back. 

V à V was their inside joke as kids. To the rest of their family, it just seemed like they were misusing ‘vis à vis’. But to them it meant ‘V’ for Five and ‘V’ for Vanya. It was reassurance that the two of them had each others back, a promise that they were being honest with each other. He hadn’t said the phrase in decades, and finally being able to say it to his sister, and have her say it back, gave him a warm feeling.

They were mostly quiet the rest of the way home, and Vanya had drifted off to sleep. They arrived at the Academy and Luther and Klaus got out of the car. Five was about to wake Vanya up when Diego said,

“Let her sleep, I’ll get her.” He crouched into the back from the side Klaus just left and carefully scooped Vanya up. “Could you get the door?” He asked Five.

“Hold on, you might as well bring her stuff up too.” Luther said as he pulled Vanya’s bag out of the trunk and handed it to Five, “Klaus and I will get the rest.”

Five took the bag and opened the door for Diego. They walked up the stairs side-by-side towards the bedrooms. They were nearing the room that was now being used as Vanya’s. It had previously been a spare room used for storage on the same floor as Five and Ben’s bedrooms, which was a floor above the others. Five opened the door for Diego.

“Five, I want to talk to you, so please don’t blink away.” Diego said as he walked into the room. He gently placed Vanya on the bed, trying not to wake her. Five put her bag down on the chair in the corner of the room, and looked at Diego expectantly. Diego removed her shoes and covered her with the blankets, he then gestured to Five to follow him out. Diego closed the door behind them and they walked down the hall together.

“What?” Five asked annoyed.

“Listen, I get that you don’t want to practice for a scenario where we have to knock Vanya out.” Diego started.

“Do you even hear yourself Diego? ‘Knock Vanya out,’ how are you all okay with that? Also, last time we tried that it was a huge apocalyptic mistake! ”

“It’s not something any of us want to do Five! But if anything happens, I’d rather we be able to stop her without hurting her, and have her wake up safe! And I want her to know that it’s possible!”

“You think she’d do something like that again?! It was an accident!” Five was starting to get heated.

They made it back to the stairs and Diego stepped down a few more so he would be eye level with Five. He hoped Five would take the gesture and realize that what Diego had to say was important. He hoped Five would calm down and listen rather than argue. He continued;

“No, I don’t think she would destroy the world or ever intentionally hurt one of us again. Those few days she had been off her meds, overwhelmed, and lashed out. She still feels awful about it all. And she’s been trying to make sure it doesn’t happen again, with training and going back to therapy. But, the fact that it wasn’t intentional makes it worse for her. Except maybe draining the life out of us in the theatre, that may have been intentional. But she didn’t really have control of her emotions at the time and we did try to kill her first.” Diego amended.

“So what? We’re just supposed to treat her like a bomb that could go off any minute? That’s something Dad would do! Hell, that’s what he did! We’re better than that!” Five was starting to get heated again.

“That’s not what I’m saying! She’s asking us for help! You heard her say that she couldn’t live with herself if she hurt anyone, and how she constantly apologizes for any slip-up! She’s scared Five!” Diego’s voice was starting to rise as well.

“Scared of what!? She’s the most powerful out of all of us, there’s nothing she should be afraid of!”

“Herself! She’s scared of herself!” Diego was now jabbing a finger into Five’s chest, “She lost her memory when she woke up in Dallas and I thank god she did! Because I don’t even want to think about what she may have done if she woke up alone and remembered what had happened! You heard what she said about when her memories came back. She had given up! Ben had to convince her to come back!”

Five looked at him questioningly, not understanding what Diego was trying to convey. Diego let out a sigh, realizing he was going to have to say it.

“She remembered what happened, and she didn’t want to live. She wasn’t going to try to come back until Ben talked to her.” Diego’s voice was calmer now, but sad. “She’s asking for help to feel safe to exist. To know that if she loses control, we can stop her before anything like that happens again. None of us want to do it Five, but I’d rather she feel safe coming to us for help than... than any alternative. If this isn’t something you think you can do, fine, I get it, I really do. Just sit it out. But if anything does happen, I want to make sure that all of us are okay in the end.”

Diego’s hand was on Five’s shoulder now, he was looking at his brother for any sign of agreement. Five’s face looked torn, as if he was trying to decide to go with anger or sadness.

“Is that all?” Five asked tightly.

“Yeah, that’s all.” Diego said. Five blinked away. Well, he at least waited for me to finish, Diego thought.


	10. Everyone lies when they say they're fine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW mention of drugs and drug use  
> TW mention of suicidal ideation

Vanya wasn’t sure what time she woke up, but she found herself in bed at the Academy. She still had a headache, but it fortunately was not as bad as earlier, and her bladder felt like it was going to burst. With much effort, she got out of bed and made her way to the bathroom one floor below, leaning heavily on the staircase railing as she went.

The Umbrella Academy was massive, though from the outside it just looked like a single building flanked by various businesses that never seemed to be open. In reality, Sir Reginald Hargreeves had bought every building and had knocked down walls and added hallways to make the Umbrella Academy an entire square block with 42 bedrooms and 19 bathrooms. Though, only the areas of the home that Dad frequented had been ‘finished.’ For example, the entryway to the kitchen, which Dad seldom entered, was a ruggedly cut hole in cement to connect the main building to the kitchen (which from the street looked like a long-abandoned butcher shop), and the children’s bedrooms were once an old solitary single room boarding house (Dad hadn’t even bothered to remove the payphone from the hallway). All of this is to say that while the Academy was massive, and parts of it were opulent, all seven children had shared one bathroom because Dad only needed their living quarters to be functional. Which is why Vanya now had to, very dizzily, trudge her way downstairs to pee.

After using the restroom and washing her face, she headed back to her bedroom. She opened her bedroom door and was disoriented, trying to make sense of what she was seeing, or rather not seeing. Where was her bed? She could feel herself swaying on her feet.

“Vanya?”

She turned towards the voice and saw Klaus, sitting up in bed. It looked like he had been knitting. Things slowly started to click into place for her. Right, this wasn’t her bedroom anymore. 

“Sorry. I… I forgot.” She said dazed, and moved to leave.

Klaus got up and stopped her. He was worried. Vanya had just walked into his room looking very confused and swaying on her feet as if she would fall down at any moment. She had forgotten that her old bedroom was gone. 

“Hey, hey, hey,” he said, while grabbing her upper arm to steady her, “why don’t you sit down?”

He guided her to sit on the bed; he saw that her eyes looked glazed over.

“How did you make it down the stairs?” He asked. She seemed confused by the question, as if she had forgotten that she had to have taken the stairs to get here.

“I’m uh, not sure… sorry, I didn’t mean to barge in.”

“It’s okay. You probably just overdid it this week. It’s been so long since one of us overused our powers, we forgot to look out for it. Remember, Allison used to get awful headaches too whenever Dad made her overdo it in training. Five would struggle to not randomly blink away if he was exhausted. Luther and Diego would just collapse, they never knew when to call it quits.” He tried to assure her, and wrapped an arm around her. She rested her head on his shoulder.

“Yeah, you’re right. I just… I wanna figure this out soon.” She said looking down at her hands.

She looked exhausted, and Klaus didn’t want her to try to walk back up the stairs.

“Lie down, you look like you’re about to pass out again.” Klaus said.

“It’s just a headache, I’m fine.” She said unconvincingly.

“Sure you are, never mind that you’re paler than a ghost.” He said sarcastically.

“Am not.” She moped.

“You can’t argue with me on that one, ghosts are my thing in this family.” He said as he got her to lie down.

“You’re always so worried, Klaus.” She mumbled.

“Excuse you? I am the free spirit in this family compared to you worry-warts.” He said in mock shock. He was lying on his side, with his hand propping up his head.

“You’re always worried about others. About us.” 

“My, my, you’re talking nonsense now,” Klaus tried to deflect, trying to have an air as if he didn’t care too much, “did you hit your head when you fell?”

“Am not. You’re always looking out for us. You were even willing to go to Sissy’s farm with me alone.” She said, recalling how it was just Klaus at first who was willing to go with her. Smiling and saying he couldn’t let her go alone into the dangerous unknown, even though she knew he was scared. Klaus hated danger, he avoided it all costs, unless it was to help one of them.

“Did you ever… look her up?” Klaus asked. He was curious, but he also wanted to change the subject. It was clear that Vanya had been in love with Sissy, had loved the kid too. Vanya nodded.

“She and Harlan moved around a lot, and settled in California. She uh, had the same roommate for over 40 years. They both passed away around the same time. From the records I found, it looked like the roommates younger sister looked after Harlan up until he- he passed a few years ago.” Vanya had tears in her eyes.

“I’m sorry.” Klaus said. Vanya shook her head.

“I loved her, and Harlan. But, it looks like she had a lifetime of happiness with someone. And I – I’m just glad she had that in her life. Even if it wasn’t with me.” Vanya said with a sad smile, and Klaus squeezed her hand in support.

“What about you?” she asked

“Oh, Destiny’s Children didn’t last long after I left, a bus crash or something happened, and then with the Nixon presidency attacking hippies, y’know.” Klaus responded.

“No, not the cult.” Vanya said.

“Then what are you talking about?” asked Klaus.

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” she thought it was obvious what she had been asking, given how Klaus hung onto the dog tags in a way that showed they were important to him, but if he was deflecting on purpose she wouldn’t press. She placed her pointer finger next to the dog tags on the mattress. She was careful not to touch them, as that may be crossing a line if they were precious to him.

“Who were they?” she asked.

Klaus instinctively reached for Dave’s dog tags and clutched them close to his chest.

“Sorry, you don’t have to answer,” she backtracked, “it’s just, whoever they were they – they were important to you. I’m sorry, it’s personal, I shouldn’t have asked.”

Klaus thought about whether or not he wanted to tell her, or how much he wanted to tell her. He had already told Allison nearly everything about Dave, and thought about what she had said about Ray, how talking about him helped. 

“Yeah, he was important.” Klaus said after a while. “His name was Dave and he was… an amazing person.”

Vanya gave him a small smile and squeezed his hand. He told her a little bit more about Dave, how he met him in Vietnam when he time travelled.

“Wait, what?” Vanya wasn’t sure if she heard that right. She knew she was a bit out of it, but did Klaus just say he met Dave in the Vietnam war?

“Oh, yeah, forgot I didn’t tell you guys about that. Well, y’know, there was a lot going on that week, got kidnapped, there was an apocalypse, not sure if you remember but it was just real busy and my time away just never came up.” He tried to brush it off.

“Klaus… holy shit. Are you okay?” Vanya asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” But Klaus used the tone he took to make something seem unimportant so people would become uninterested. 

“Wait… if you met him in the war…and then in Dallas… did you meet him twice?”

Shit, she’s perceptive. Thought Klaus, How the hell could she piece that together when she just forgot how she got down the stairs a few minutes ago?

“Yeah, well, you know how that ended, with three years of sobriety.”

“That’s when?”

“Yeah, but, it’s not like it mattered at that point. You were all alive so I didn’t have to worry about missing a ghostly message from you.” He tried to deflect.

“Didn’t matter?” she repeated. How could he say it didn’t matter? 

“Spare me the lecture Vanya.” Said Klaus.

“No it’s…” she tried to gather her thoughts which took a bit of effort at the moment, “Klaus it’s not about your powers or – or trying to see us if we were dead. What matters is you.”

“What are you talking about?” he asked.

“You. Your health. That’s what matters. I will always love you. Regardless of if you’re sober or not, that won’t change. But I – I don’t want to lose you. That’s what matters.” She tried to make her sincerity clear.

“That’s sweet, Vanny,” and it really was, he was touched, but he was uncomfortable with the honesty and needed to lighten the mood, “but don’t worry, I’ve met god once and she doesn’t care for me, pretty sure she’d just send me back down again if I died.” He said with a laugh.

That was apparently the wrong to thing to say, because Vanya just looked horrified by that news.

“Wow… god’s a dick then.” She said after a few moments, not sure how else to respond to that news.

“Yeah. And besides, I had the Bentacles yelling at me to stay sober for those three years, too.” he added.

Right, Klaus wasn’t alone in Dallas. He technically hadn’t been alone since Ben died. Ben had asked her to look out for Klaus for him. She knew Klaus didn’t need a babysitter or anything so demeaning, but she had been trying to be a better sister. She wrote a whole book about her siblings weren’t there for her, but she hadn’t been there for them either.

“I’d be with you! If you – if you ever wanted to try, go to meetings, or anything you need. I’d go with you, so you wouldn’t be alone. If you wanted, not that you have to, but if you ever wanted.” She finished. She felt like she had rambled and wished she could get her thoughts in order.

“Vanya, you don’t have to. I’m not sure if I’d ever-“

“I know. Just, if you wanted. I’ve been a pretty shitty sister, I haven’t been there for you. I want to be better.” She looked at him earnestly.

Klaus knew she was being honest, in her current state he didn’t believe she could put forth the effort to piece together a lie. And it wasn’t the first time she had tried. Thanks to their shared wall as kids, she often heard him when he couldn’t take the voices anymore and pleaded with the ghosts to stop. She would sometimes knock on his door to check on him, and sit with him if he didn’t tell her to leave (with so many of the dead crowding around him and shouting, it was sometimes hard to tell the living from the dead and he wasn’t always sure it was her). She always seemed worried, unsure how to help, but that didn’t stop her from trying.

His other siblings would check on him too, especially Allison. But their rooms were farther away and couldn’t always hear when things were bad.

He also knew that Vanya was working on improving her relationships with them. On one of their coffee dates she had apologized for only focusing on her own victimization, and blaming them when they were just kids and had been victims of Dad’s abuse as well. She apologized for the book, and for trying to kill them in the theatre. Klaus was ready to brush her offer off with a joke, but the look on her face was so pleading. He realized that she was really trying to be supportive. He took a deep breath.

“If I ever want to take you up on that, I’ll let you know.” Said Klaus. Not committing, but also not shutting her down completely. She seemed to accept the answer.

“I love you.” 

“Love you, too Vanny.” He said as he kissed the top of her head.

“I’m glad you had someone important. Even if it wasn’t forever.”

“Me too.”

They fell into silence. Klaus watched as Vanya’s eyes began to droop, and she fell asleep within a few minutes. He thought about what she had said, about getting clean. Allison had noticed that he was mostly sticking to alcohol and some rather tame pills. He hadn’t started the harder stuff again, withdrawal had been a bitch and his current drugs of choice met his needs. He could still see ghosts, but his powers were dulled. He couldn’t make them corporeal most of the time, and he couldn’t conjure them from the beyond.

But, he also knew it was likely just a matter of time until he needed something stronger to keep his powers at bay. He still didn’t like seeing ghosts, but he had lived with his power uninhibited for three years and had coped with it (though, he did have Ben around to shoo away some of the less friendly dearly departed). But now, the ghosts were slowly becoming more persistent the greater the tolerance Klaus built up to his current drugs of choice, and this time he didn’t have the reason of perhaps seeing his siblings to stay sober. But, a much more pressing reason was that he didn’t want to risk conjuring Dave. He had royally fucked up their meetings, and while Klaus still lived through the events they had shared together, he doubted Dave would have lived the same life that led to them meeting in barracks while under attack in Vietnam. Even if he had, he probably would have stayed away from the man who shared the same name and appearance as the cult leader he had met five years earlier. Klaus wasn’t sure if he could resist conjuring Dave if he could do it, but he was also terrified of meeting a Dave who had never loved him. So he kept his powers at bay.

But Allison and Vanya were both supportive. Maybe, if he wouldn’t be alone… Klaus thought as he drifted off to sleep.

* * * *

When Luther had gotten up that morning, he noticed Klaus’s door was open, and saw Klaus and Vanya asleep. Vanya was curled up next to Klaus’s side, and Klaus was sprawled out, an arm flung over her. He saw Diego walk out of his room, and he silently signaled for his brother to come over and see. The two shared a look, both excited at the opportunity to ruin this touching moment.

“They’re adorable.” Luther said loudly with a shit-eating grin, waking them up.

“Absolutely precious.” Diego added, causing them to both groan.

“Isn’t it a bit early for you two to act like assholes?” Klaus asked groggily.

“We’re just commenting on how cute you two are. How is that being an asshole?” Diego asked innocently.

“Because you two are doing this at the fucking crack of dawn.” Vanya said annoyed. She was tired and still had a headache.

Diego and Luther were positively overjoyed that they had managed to get on their sisters nerves as well. Klaus was an easy target, but Vanya tried not to acknowledge when they annoyed her. It just egged them on further.

“Why the hell are you two shouting?” Five asked as he blinked into the hall.

“We’re just appreciating a touching family moment.” Said Luther, as he directed Fives attention to Klaus, who was now covering his ears, and Vanya, who had shoved a pillow over her head to try to drown them out. Neither of them were morning people. Five caught on.

“How endearing.” Five said loudly while smiling, making them both grumble. He was still not happy with the events of the previous day, but he relished the opportunity to annoy his siblings and he could do with some cheering up.

“Alright, get out, gay siblings only!” Klaus snapped.

“That’s very narrow minded of you Klaus, to just assume our sexual orientation.” Luther said in mock scorn.

“Yeah, you’re just assuming we’re straight? I don’t think that’s something I’ve discussed with you.” Diego chipped in, stepping further into the room.

“And your statement is quite open-ended. Are you including the full LGBTQIA spectrum?” Five asked. 

“Fine, claustrophobic siblings only!” Klaus amended, hoping his brothers would be less inclined to admit to a phobia. He had been claustrophobic ever since Dad started shoving him into mausoleums, and for Vanya it was after the whole chamber in the basement thing.

“You know, four years on the moon in a tiny capsule, I’m not a fan of enclosed spaces myself.” Luther countered as he stepped further into the room.

“Yeah, about that, how did you like never accidentally punch a whole in the side or something?” Diego asked. 

“It was literally a constant concern.” Luther told him.

They were still speaking with booming voices, stepping further into the room and closer to the two who clearly wanted to go back to sleep.

“Oh my god, why?!” asked Vanya, her voice muffled by the pillow.

“What, we’re just having polite conversation.” Diego said innocently. Klaus grabbed his pillow and threw it at Diego, who deftly caught it.

“Now what was that supposed to accomplish, Klaus?” Five asked.

They heard a sound behind them and they looked back to see one of Klaus’s trinkets fall to the floor, they all looked back at Vanya.

“That’s progress, V. You didn’t try to kill us this time.” Diego joked.

“Maybe I just missed.” She grumbled.

“You’re also going from expressing yourself passive-aggressively, to just aggressively, which is also progress.” Luther added.

Vanya bolted up and threw her pillow at Luther. He didn’t bother to deflect it and just looked amused. Vanya was kneeling on the bed and had to use her arms to steady herself, the room was spinning.

“Are you going to pass out again, or destroy the world? Just, want to be prepared for whichever scenario we’re dealing with.” Diego asked, trying to mask his concern.

“Hopefully neither.” Vanya answered while staring at the floor. She would very much like it if the room stopped spinning now.

“Come on, if you’re still not feeling well I’m taking you to Mom.” Diego walked to the bed and offered her his hand.

“I’m fine.” Vanya said.

“Yeah, everyone in this family lies when they say they’re fine.” He said, repeating her own words from when she patched him up after the fights.

He helped her stand and Vanya leaned against him for support as they looked for Mom. When they found her, Mom determined that Vanya needed to rest, but would be fine. She helped Vanya back to her room, telling her she needed to sleep more and drink some water. Diego waited for them to disappear up the stairs before going to the corner he noticed Pogo lurking in earlier.

“Hi Pogo.” He said as he clearly caught the old chimp eavesdropping.

“Master Diego, good morning.” Pogo said.

“What are you doing?” Diego asked.

“Is Miss Vanya alright?” Pogo asked, ignoring the question.

“Yeah, she should be fine. Just exhausted, you remember what it was like when we were still learning how to control our powers.” Diego answered.

“Yes, of course.”

“You could have also just asked her. You know, talk to her like a person.”

That seemed to annoy Pogo, as he gave an angry huff and appeared to be about to leave. But Diego had another question.

“Is it weird for you? To see Mom, when you knew the human Grace?” Diego asked. He had been wondering it for some time. The rest of them never knew Mom was designed to look like a person Dad knew. But Pogo had known her, hell she had raised him.

“At first.” Pogo admitted, “but, you met Dr. Grace Hooper, correct?”

“Yeah.” Diego said.

“Then surely you have noticed that their similarities are in appearance only. They are two separate people, incredible in their own ways, and both are close to my heart.”

Diego wasn’t expecting such honesty. He was expecting Pogo to deflect, or turn it into another way to defend Dad.

“Why’d he do it? Make her look like her?” Diego questioned further.

“Your father loved Dr. Hooper very much. Her loss was a tragedy.”

“Loss?”

“Officially, a car accident. Unofficially… your father had many enemies, and they knew Dr. Hooper was important to him, even after she left him.”

“You think he made Mom look like her out of love?”

“You disagree?”

“Like you said, they’re similar in appearance only. That’s not love, that’s possession.”

Pogo gave him a discerning look before leaving. The more Diego learned of his father, the more he hated the man. It was clear that he never loved anyone, only wished to own them.

Vanya woke up again a few hours later, with just a mild headache. She gathered her things intending to head home now that she was feeling better. Luther walked by and noticed her packing up. He tried to convince her to stay at the Academy another day ‘just in case.’ But she knew the real reason was because he liked having them all there. 

He had spent years alone, even before the moon, and had newfound appreciation for having Klaus and Five at home. He enjoyed being able to have conversations with Klaus, even if they did sometimes err on being ridiculous, and he enjoyed tending to the garden with Five or reviewing astrophysics. He even appreciated the quiet evenings when they would all just pour over Dad’s old files trying to find out what the bastard had been up to.

Vanya insisted that she was fine and had to get ready for work and students the next day. She was on her way to the kitchen, intending to call a cab, but was surprised to see Pogo in the hall. She kept walking, expecting him to either only acknowledge her with a nod or pretend to not notice her like he had been doing for the past few months.

“Are you feeling better, Miss Vanya?” Pogo asked when she walked by him.

Vanya stopped in her tracks. 

“Um, yes.” She answered surprised. 

“That’s good to hear. I’m glad.” He said while giving her a small smile.

“Uh… thank you.” She said before shuffling away. It was almost like how he used to treat her, before she knew she had powers. She wasn’t sure how to feel, on one side her heart ached as she longed to be back on good terms with the person who was more like a father to her than her own dad, but she was also weary to hope as he likely still viewed her as a danger that needed to be drugged or caged.

She turned the corner and saw Diego sitting with Mom in front of her paintings. They both turned towards her.

“Vanya, how are you feeling sweetheart?” Mom asked as she strode towards her.

“I’m feeling better.” Vanya answered as Mom placed a hand on her forehead, “I should head home, I’ve got work and students tomorrow.”

“Hmm, alright, you do seem better than this morning. But you shouldn’t overwork yourself dear.” Mom said while giving her a concerned look.

“Okay, I won’t.” Vanya promised her.

“I’ll give you a ride home.” Diego said.

“You don’t have to, I’m just gonna call a cab.” She didn’t want to be anymore of an inconvenience than she was already.

“I was about to head out anyways. Bye, Mom.” He said as he leaned down to kiss their mother’s cheek.

“Goodbye Diego, drive safe.” Mom told him.

Vanya said goodbye to Mom and gave her a hug. She and Diego sat in silence as he drove for the first few minutes.

“Are you really feeling better, or did you just want to leave?” He asked after awhile. 

“I really do feel better. It’s just a dull headache now.” She answered.

“Good.” They sat in silence for another minute before he followed up, “Any particular reason you didn’t tell us sooner?”

“I didn’t think it would get that bad.” She answered.

“You were still in pain before you passed out. Why didn’t you tell us?” Diego wasn’t going to let this go. This could have ended much worse than just a headache; if she had passed out while she was in the air… it could have been a lot worse.

“Sorry, I – I didn’t want to worry you guys, and I knew you’d stop the training if I said anything. I need to get control of these powers, and I thought I could push through.” She answered.

“Screw worrying us. You need to tell us stuff like that, you walked away with a headache yesterday but it could have ended a lot worse.” He was trying to keep his temper in check and not yell at her.

“Sorry.” She said again, her gaze downcast.

“And stop apologizing! I’m not mad at you, I’m worried! Just, promise you’ll tell us next time, before it gets that bad.” Diego asked.

“Sor-“ she started to say but stopped. Diego glared at her, daring her to finish that word. She kept her eyes glued to the window, not meeting his gaze.

“I promise I’ll tell you next time.” She assured him.

“Good.” He said. “And learning control of your powers is going to take time. It’s not a process you can rush through. It took the rest of us years. Just be patient.”

“Hard to be patient when I’ve already destroyed the world three times. Really trying to make sure there’s not a fourth.” She said.

“Hey,” he waited for her to look at him, “you have your family looking out for you this time. That’s not gonna happen again, I promise.”

“It’s not something you guys could just wing. You need to… you need to prepare for if it does happen!” she pleaded. 

Rain drops started to hit the windshield. Diego looked at them for a moment before turning his attention back to Vanya.

“We will if that’s what you need to feel okay. We will. I told Five that if he’s not up for it, then to just sit it out. So if that’s something you want us to practice, we’ll do it. But, within reason, none of us want to hurt one another.” He waited for some kind of acknowledgement from her.

“Thank you.” She said after a few moments. The rain continued to fall.

He contemplated what he wanted to say next. He was working on letting his siblings know that he cared about them, on being there for them. Rather than just yelling at them whenever they were in danger, trying to mask his fear with anger. He had yelled at her when Hazel and Cha-Cha attacked them. He saw she was bleeding and realized she had been in danger. He yelled at her and called her a liability. He wanted her to leave because being around the rest of them put her in danger and that scared him. And he sent her straight to Jenkins, the creep. How differently would things have turned out if he had just said that he was scared being at the Academy put her in danger, and he wanted her to be somewhere safe? If he had let his family know he was worried about them rather than only telling Eudora how scared he was that they were nearly killed that morning on her front porch. So now he was trying to communicate better with his siblings, was trying to be someone Eudora would be proud of. Also, he had seen how emotionally constipated Five was, and he did not want to end up like that. The old man would just get drunk whenever he had emotions he couldn’t handle.

“Vanya… if you ever start to feel anything like you did in Dallas, w-w-when you said you gave up and didn’t want to come b-b-back until Ben talked to you, tell me. P-promise you’ll tell me.” Just the thought of her feeling that way scared him and his stutter resurfaced. But Allison had told him Vanya was still having nightmares about what happened, and with Vanya’s insistence of how dangerous she felt she was, it was important that he addressed this now.

She quickly glanced at him before looking down.

“Okay, I promise.” She said, still looking at the floor.

“Good.” He said while reaching over and squeezing her hand.

They made it to her apartment, and Vanya insisted that she was perfectly capable of walking up the stairs herself. It was dark even though it was the middle of the day due to the rain, so Diego didn’t drive away until he saw the light in her apartment turn on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter titles are random spur of the moment decisions when i see once again that this site asks for a chapter title as if it's a surprise and not something that is to be expected every single time


	11. You guys didn’t really try at the theatre

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW allusion to suicidal ideation

The next day Five and Vanya sat in her living room, a chessboard between them. He had shown up earlier in the evening, shortly after her last student had left. It was rare for him to come during the day, rather than the middle of the night. But Vanya had also been leaving her day planner out in plain view, so he would know when she had practice, or students, or therapy, as she felt one reason he kept showing up in the dead of night was because that was a time he knew she would be home. This was their third round, and she noticed that he had been dragging each of them out, purposefully avoiding moves that would let him win too early.

“Are you ready for your next training this weekend?” he asked offhandedly, as if he had not been mulling over his thoughts for the past 30 minutes. 

“I should be, the headache stopped last night. Are you?” she countered.

He pretended to be focusing on his next move to avoid answering. After a few moments he moved a knight, choosing to not move his queen that would have allowed him to win in a few more turns.

“If I get like how I was before, you all need to be able to stop me this time. If you try to wing it or hesitate like at the theatre, you will all just get hurt. I can’t have that.” She continued when he remained silent, and moved one of her pieces.

“The theatre was an accident. The perfect storm of family secrets and pent up emotions.” He said without looking at her.

“What happened can’t just be trivialized as an accident. I didn’t mean to destroy the world, but I did try to kill you all. Even if I lashed out because my emotions were out of control, it was still something I was capable of. No matter how guilty or horrified I am by it, it’s still something I did. If you… if it’s not something you think you can do then just sit that practice out.” She replied, echoing Diego’s words at the end.

Diego must have told her about their conversation when he took her home yesterday. That annoyed Five, it felt like he was being handled.

“What even makes you think we could stop you? We tried to kill you at the theatre and you stopped us without breaking a sweat.” He asked rudely. 

He knew that wasn’t something he should point out; especially not after Diego had explained his concerns about Vanya not feeling safe to exist. But he felt that there would be other ways to make her feel safe if that was the issue, ways that didn’t involve them possibly killing one another. He worked too hard to get back to his family for this to happen. There had to be other ways, he’d find them. He’d fix this.

“You guys didn’t really try at the theatre, though.” She answered. That surprised Five and he finally took his eyes off the board to look at her.

“Didn’t try? Vanya four of us tried! We couldn’t get to you!” Five exclaimed.

They were staring at each other, and Vanya seemed to be contemplating something. After a few moments she seemed to have made a decision and grabbed four of his discarded black pieces and her white queen. She arranged the black pieces in a semi-circle around the queen next to the chessboard. She was recreating their fight at the theatre.

“Four highly-trained superheroes decide to attack me head-on, which makes no sense, and none of you used your powers.” She explained.

“Didn’t use our powers? Is your memory still off? Because I distinctly remember a lot of powers being used that night! Even Ben released the Horror!” Five spat out.

“Not against me.” She touched one of the black pieces in the semi-circle, “Klaus was able to make Ben corporeal, and they took out a bunch of … whatever the people with guns were-“

“Time assassins.” Five supplied.

“- time assassins. But Klaus just ran straight at me. He didn’t make Ben corporeal. It would have made more sense to send Ben at me since my powers didn’t effect him, and the Horror could have easily taken me out.” Five tried not to wince at that thought as she pointed to another piece, “Diego had also been fighting the time assassins without restraint. He curved his knives to be kill shots each time. But he didn’t throw a single knife at me.” She pointed to another piece, “Luther may have actually been trying, but with his powers it’s difficult to tell.” 

She pointed to the final piece. Five clenched his jaw, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to hear this analysis.

“And you ran straight at me. Head on. That’s not your style, Five.” She continued.

“Not my style? No offense Vanya, but how would you know? You never went on missions with us!” He had lost his temper, and regretted saying it almost immediately. It was cruel to bring up her exclusion from the rest of them, and he worried he may have crossed a line. He contemplated rewinding time to take it back.

Vanya saw the look in his eyes change from anger to regret. But she wasn’t going to hold what he said against him, she knew this must be hard for him.

“No, but I still saw your trainings. And I watched a lot of the missions from afar next to Dad. Even at the theatre, you blinked behind the time assassins to kill them.” She picked up the black chess piece and placed it behind the white queen. “You could have blinked behind me, and taken me out at any time. But, I think the Commissions best assassin already knew that.” She said while looking him in the eyes. She saw he was trying to maintain his composure, but his usually carefully constructed mask of indifference was broken and he looked upset. 

“Despite you guys saying that you were trying to kill me… none of you actually were.” She continued. Five’s jaw was still clenched, and he took a deep breath through his nose. Vanya reached for his hand, he flinched slightly but didn’t pull away. “Allison even had the perfect shot, and chose not to take it. I’m not saying this to be mean. And I know it’s weird to say but I’m also really touched that you guys didn’t give it your all… it was sweet in a messed up Hargreeves family way. But you guys can’t do that again. I could really kill you! I know it’s mean to ask this of you all. But my powers are dangerous, and if anything happened you guys would be the only ones even capable of stopping me.”

“If you are a threat, if you lose control I promise I will stop you.” Five tried to assure her.

“It’s not something you can just wing. You all hesitated before, and I would have killed you if it weren’t for Allison. But if it’s not something you can do, just sit it out. I understand, I know it’s selfish of me to rely on you all to - to keep me in check.” 

“I’d stop you, I promise. So don’t… don’t worry about it.” He looked distressed.

“You have a big heart, Five. . . It’s your turn.”

Five withdrew his hand from hers, and continued their game, contemplating what she meant about him having a big heart. He knew the issue wasn’t over with. That him telling her not to worry didn’t assuage her fears. He wished it had. He wished she would have believed his promise to keep her safe like she used to when they were kids. But life wasn’t so simple now. She no longer worried about a monster under her bed, or in a dark alley as they snuck out to Griddy’s. No, now she worried that the monster was herself. And Five didn’t know how to fix that. 

What she thought of herself was in such discordance with what he knew she was; a timid but deeply caring person. It was so obvious to him that her fear was misplaced. Why couldn’t she see it?

* * *

Vanya saw Klaus waiting for her near the exit as she left practice. It was late in the evening as practices were getting longer and longer as they prepared for the next concert. She and Klaus had made plans to get tacos together before going to the Academy for the next board meeting, which Allison would call in for. They had chosen to hold the meeting late in their time zone since Allison had to maintain a strict shooting schedule for her next film.

“That sounded pretty good.” He told her when she reached him.

“Thanks.” She said while giving him a small smile. She was reminded of how appreciative she was to have her family in her life again; how nice it felt to have a family with just these small exchanges.

“So, a change of plans – “ he started.

“Don’t tell me no tacos?” Vanya asked sadly.

“No, definitely still tacos. Just, we gotta pick up food for the others too. Diego asked Luther to help him spar, so we’re going to the gym instead.” He explained.

They picked up the food and headed to the gym. It was late at night so it was empty save for the siblings; even Al had gone home by then. When they walked in they saw Diego and Luther in the ring, and Five sitting on a bench pouring over a pile of papers.

“Jesus, don’t tell me that’s the agenda.” Klaus said when he saw the paperwork Five was looking over.

“No, it’s some projections from Hargreeves Enterprises. I asked Five to double check their math because I thought the calculations looked off.” Luther answered.

“And unfortunately he was right. Some idiot forgot to take into account the gravitational pull of Europa.” Five answered as he continued to make marks on the pages.

“Oh no, not Europa.” Klaus said in a voice that almost sounded sincere as Luther glared at him. “Not as high-stakes as your earlier math dilemma today. He helped Claire with her math homework over the phone.” He informed Vanya and Diego.

“That’s so sweet.” Said Vanya.

“Precious.” Diego added.

“Whatever, that was kindergarten math, any of us could have helped with that.” Luther interceded, who was a bit sore that she didn’t ask uncle ‘Spaceboy’ for help.

“Could have. But when Allison called she said Claire was specifically asking for Five because he was good enough to time travel with math. Insisted on it. Wouldn’t even trust Allison’s help. Very high-stakes.” Said Klaus.

Luther opened and closed his mouth, trying to come up with a retort but not finding one.

“Jealous, Number One? That I am quickly becoming the favorite uncle?” Five asked.

“We don’t have proof of that, yet.” Luther replied.

“Allison got to see Claire today?” Vanya asked as she started unpacking the bags and checking whose food was which.

“For a few hours, Patrick brought her by to see her when she had a break from shooting. She mostly helped her with schoolwork.” Five answered.

“That’s sweet.” Diego said and the others looked at him curiously. “Y’know, Mom stuff. It’s nice, that she can do that again.” He explained as he took the container Klaus handed him.

“So what do we have today? Any updates on the shell corporations?” Vanya asked.

Five finished marking the paperwork he had in front of him and set it under the bench. Klaus passed him his food and sat next to him. Vanya joined them after giving Luther his. Luther and Diego set their plates on the edge of ring, choosing to stand while eating. 

“A few updates on that, but still nothing solid. Should we call Allison now?” Luther asked.

“She said she’d call when she was free.” Diego answered.

“Oh, yeah, which one of you told Allison about me passing out?” Vanya asked.

Her brothers sensed that there was more to this question, and were hesitant to answer.

“Why?” Diego bravely asked after a few moments of silence. “It’s not like it was a secret or anything.”

“Because whoever it was made it sound like I was dying according to her, and I got a 20 minute lecture yesterday on taking care of myself.” Vanya explained.

“I don’t think anyone is going to admit to that now.” Luther replied. 

In actuality, it was group culpability. After Mom had sent Vanya back to bed, Luther, Klaus and Diego had all taken turns on the phone to update Allison. They may have been a bit overly descriptive in an attempt to out due the others account of events. They had also informed her of Five’s reaction, and suspected Allison and Claire may have been trying to cheer him up with the insistence of math homework help.

The phone started to ring and Five picked it up. After a brief greeting he attached a device to the receiver and Allison’s voice could be heard by all of them. He placed the receiver down on top of the phone box and sat back on the bench.

“Hey, Allison, can you hear us?” Luther asked.

“Yeah, loud and clear.” Allison replied.

“You ready to get started?” Five asked.

“Yeah.” 

“Are you also joining us in taco solidarity?” Klaus asked.

“Yes,” Allison could be heard laughing through the phone, “but mine are LA street tacos so they are definitely better than yours!”

They eventually settled down and got to business. They were still looking through some of Dad’s shadier businesses, they voted to expand (anonymous) charitable donations to various organizations Allison and Klaus had researched, and discussed other updates of the Umbrella Academy businesses. They wrapped up and said goodnight to Allison. Diego dropped Vanya off at her apartment before starting his night of vigilantism, and the other three went back to the Academy.

* * *

_She was standing in the theatre. Her sister was on the floor behind her, bleeding out from her throat that Vanya had sliced. Now, Vanya stood staring at four of her brothers as she held them aloft and drained the life out of them._

_She was furious at them all and wanted them dead. Then they could never hurt her, never make her feel inferior; never make her hope that they might love her._

_She tried to ignore the voice in the back of her head screaming at her to stop, that she loved them._

_Yes, she loved them, but that made what they did to her hurt so much more. She watched the life drain out of them, and heard Allison gasping for air behind her._

_She needed to stop, she was killing them! Stop! Stop! STOP! SHE’S KILLING THEM! SHE LOVES THEM! SHE’S KILLING THEM!_

Vanya woke up screaming and sat bolt upright. She heard her bedroom mirror crack as she covered her mouth to stifle her sobs and try to regain some composure. It was a nightmare, she wasn’t there, she didn’t kill her siblings!

There was a flash of light next to her that made her jump and give out stifled gasp. She looked over and saw Five, already in a fighting stance, scanning the room for whatever caused her to scream. When he saw nothing he stooped down to be eye-level with her and gripped her shoulders. She was shaking.

“Vanya, Vanya! What’s wrong?” He looked and sounded worried. She let out another sob and he scanned the room again, this time noticing that the mirror had a new huge crack. It started to rain outside. 

“What happened?” he asked more calmly.

“Nightmare.” She answered after taking a deep breath.

“Nightmare?” He glanced back at the broken mirror, “of what?”

“The theatre.” She answered, looking down ashamed.

Five studied his sisters face. She was terrified, and if the mirror was any indication this wasn’t the first time this had happened. He wanted to assure her that everything was fine, but his conversation with Diego came to mind. Assurances would be hollow, and it would just be a way for him to avoid the problem because he was the one who didn’t want to acknowledge that there was a problem. No, this was going to have to be something they talked about.

“Come on, I’ll make you some tea.” He said. 

She followed him into her kitchen, and saw that there was already a half-empty pot of coffee and a notebook filled with equations next to a fluffer-nutter sandwich on the table. Five put a kettle on the stove and grabbed the box of chamomile tea.

“What were you working on?” Vanya asked.

“It doesn’t matter, my equations aren’t right. How long have you been having those nightmares?” he asked.

Five was familiar with nightmares. In the apocalypse, he had them frequently. Of running out of water, freezing in the snow, losing Dolores, countless nightmares of everything that could go wrong. But he also had nightmares of waking up back in the Academy, of being home with his family after so long. Only to have it all crumble in front of him, or go up in flames, or just disappear. And he would be back in the apocalypse, standing over the corpses of his siblings before waking up. Even now that he was really back home, there would be sometimes when he would wake up in his bed terrified that it was just another nightmare and it was just a matter of time before he was back in the apocalypse. That was one of the reasons he liked Vanya’s place, besides just being around his favorite sibling, he didn’t know her apartment before the apocalypse so it was never in one of his nightmares. Here he knew that he wasn’t in the apocalypse. 

“On and off, since coming back from Dallas.” She answered while looking down at the table.

“What happens in the nightmares?” he asked as he plopped a tea bag into a mug. She didn’t answer, just kept staring down at the table. “I just thought that mirror was old before, but it has more cracks in it compared to the last time I saw it. What gets you so freaked out that you wake up screaming and break stuff?”

Vanya wrapped her arms around herself. Five willed himself to remain patient as he waited for her to answer. She was quiet for some time before answering. 

“I’m killing you all in the theatre. Or I’m killing Allison in the cabin. Sometimes Allison’s bleeding out in the theatre while…” she trailed off.

“You didn’t kill us, though. We’re all still here.” Except for Ben. But he was working on equations to fix that. He would fix anything he needed to in order to make this timeline work.

“Not from lack of trying. Thank god for Allison. I have no idea how she survived that, but thank god she did.” Vanya said as she took the cup of tea Five handed her. She warmed her hands around it. “And at the theatre, I would have killed you all if it weren’t for her. And don’t start talking about how it was ‘an accident.’ The moon was an accident, almost killing all of you wasn’t.”

Vanya looked down into her tea thinking about how much she owed Allison for stopping her from finishing something so wretched. When she had looked at her brothers, suspended in the air and slowly dying by her own hand, she couldn’t stop. It was like she was on autopilot. She wouldn’t admit this to her siblings, but she had heard Allison come up behind her. But there was something in her approach… her steps were slow. She wasn’t rushing to attack her like her brothers had. She knew Allison was there but she wasn’t a threat, her sister didn’t want to harm her. Whatever small part of her was still rational willed herself to not react, to not turn towards Allison. She heard Allison turn off the safety on the gun. And then Vanya knew. She knew what was about to happen. And so long as she didn’t move, it would end. Allison would save her from killing their brothers. Waiting for her sister to pull the trigger felt like an eternity as she waited for death, waited for Allison to save her from doing something she wouldn’t be able to live with. She heard the gun and her world went dark. She never expected to wake up.

“Alright, almost killing us wasn’t an accident. Do you still want to kill us?” Five asked, pulling her out of her thoughts.

“What? No! I hate that I did that! If Allison hadn’t stopped me I don’t know how I could have lived with myself!”

Shit. Thought Five. There it was, what Diego had warned him about.

“What matters isn’t what you did in a moment of anger when your whole world came crashing down and your own family tried to- tried to kill you.” Five struggled to get the words out; he hated what they had done. Or, at least what he and Luther had tried to do even if it was half-hearted, the others never agreed to the ‘killing’ plan. “What matters is the fact that it’s something you regret and ever since then you have tried make things right, and you’ve taken steps to make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

“It’s still something I’m capable of. It could still happen again.” She said.

“Theoretically anything could happen! Talking frogs could be in the street by sunrise! It’s highly unlikely, but it’s a probability! Just because anything could happen doesn’t mean it will! And those two days were an anomaly. You were off your medication for the first time since you could remember. And I don’t think that anomaly will happen again, the Commission orchestrated events to make it all happen! I don’t think you’re a danger to us or the world anymore, not after you’ve had time to process what happened and cope without your medication. So stop – just stop blaming yourself for everything that happened!” Five finished, realizing he had been raising his voice as he went on. 

She stared at him with wide eyes for a few moments before giving out a shaky sigh.

“Five I’m… I’m scared. One mistake and I can destroy everything. One slip up and I could kill one of you!”

“We didn’t know what we were dealing with before. And we weren’t there for one another like we are now, like -” he was about to say team but that wasn’t the right word, “like a family. We’re not going to let that happen. And if you have a ‘slip up’ I’ll rewind time and fix it. I promise. You’re not working through this alone.”

He had the determined stubbornness look on his face he would get when his mind was set. He would keep that promise, she knew he would.

“Thanks, Five.” She said after a pause.

“Sorry I raised my voice.” He said as he looked away and sipped his now cold coffee.

“It’s okay, you were coming from a good place. You have a big heart.” She replied.

“That’s the second time you’ve said that to me. I can assure you, and history will attest to this, I don’t. I’ve killed numerous people.” Five said.

She gave him a discerning look. She couldn’t let him, her best friend who saved the world from her multiple times, think that. He gave off the air of indifference and arrogance to hide how much he cared about things, about people. Though he felt he was smarter than everyone else, he didn’t view others lives as unimportant. Quite the opposite; he knew how important each life was. And she knew he didn’t need his math to tell him that. It was even more obvious with his word choice, ‘killed numerous people’. Numerous. Not countless. She knew he would have counted each one. He would remember every person he killed, he would not have allowed himself to forget, to let them be a nameless hazy memory.

“Yes, you do, Five. You’re pragmatic, but… you care about people. You care so much that even when it makes the most sense to just cut your losses, you always choose the path that would save people, which is usually us. Even in the apocalypse, you found someone to care for. It’s just who you are.”

Five didn’t tell his siblings much about Delores, he didn’t want them to know much about their relationship. It was private. They just knew that they had been together in the apocalypse. And they only knew that much because they had seen him with her at the Academy before he returned her to the department store.

“So when I say you have a big heart,” she continued, “it’s because I know you do… V à V.” she said, letting him know that she was being completely honest with him. “And uh, thanks, because we’d –I’d - be really screwed if you didn’t.”

Five didn’t respond, and instead continued eating the fluffer-nutter sandwich he had started before he heard Vanya scream. The minutes ticked by and the sun was starting to come up. Vanya chose to just start her day early rather than try to go back to bed. She had a concert in a few weeks and could do with some extra practice at the theatre when it was empty. She went to change, and Five was gone when she came back.


	12. The Dreaded Practice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW chloroform use
> 
> Not sure if that should be TW but better safe than sorry.
> 
> And yes, I know that's not how chloroform works, but after some very shady googling and learning about other options I decided the ol' hollywood trope would be good enough bc holy shit let's go with a trope rather than some scary stuff
> 
> Thanks for reading!

The rest of the week passed without much incident. Her siblings insisted she needed to rest and so Vanya didn’t have any trainings at the Academy that week. Allison still called them all whenever she could, and Diego was arrested and soon released for trespassing yet again while being a vigilante.

Vanya and her brothers returned to the cabin that weekend. Diego and Allison had tried to talk her out of training that week, saying that she should give it a break and focus on practicing for the concert the following weekend. But Vanya insisted she was fine, and brought her violin to the cabin so she could practice there as well.

In actuality, the fact that she had an upcoming concert made her even more worried and determined to make sure her family could intervene if anything happened. So with that in mind, after about an hour of control exercises, she insisted that they practice trying to stop her.

“Yeah, I’m gonna sit this one out. I think we can all agree that my power is pretty useless in this scenario.” Said Klaus.

“What are you talking about? Vanya’s sound waves don’t affect ghosts, your power is probably the most useful in this case!” Said Luther.

“Hmm, and do you see any ghosts here Luther? In the middle of nowhere?” Klaus asked as he took out a flask. Luther was getting impatient.

“You know I can’t, that’s your thing! If you made them corporeal like before, then the rest of us could see!” Luther said.

“Can’t make corporeal what’s not here.” Klaus said in a sing-song voice that made Luther start to fume. “You understand Vanny, I’m just sexy trash.” Klaus continued as he took a drink.

“You’re not trash Klaus, but I understand.” Vanya assured him. 

“I love that you didn’t argue the sexy part.” Klaus said as he kissed the top of her head.

“Alright, anyone else sitting out?” Diego asked, his gaze lingering on Five. When there were no objections he continued, “Alright, Vanya go wander around the forest or something. And yell if you’re in trouble, or come across a bear, all of you.”

“I thought we all agreed I’d win against a bear?” Vanya said.

“Yeah, pretty sure you were the one who was just a ‘maybe’ Diego.” Added Five.

Diego was not amused and said it was time for them to start. Klaus headed back to the cabin. He had lied earlier, there were several ghosts in the forest. But those ghosts had come with them, and his siblings did not need to know that they were being haunted, much less see who was haunting them. So it was a much better idea to not make anyone corporeal and let his siblings believe that there simply were no ghostly beings around. Klaus took a long swig from his flask as the ghosts yelled at him for his lie. He was going to need a refill once he reached the cabin.

* * * 

Vanya had walked a ways into the forest but stopped. It sounded like Luther wasn’t even trying to be stealthy as he loudly snapped branches in the underbrush.

“Luther, I can hear you a mile away.” She said as she turned towards the noise.

“Yeah, well that’s not exactly fair since you can hear most things a mile away with your super-human hearing. You can hear your own heart beat if you focus, probably others too.” She heard him say as he slowly emerged into view.

“Anyone would be able to hear you! It’s like you’re not even trying to be quiet!” she said as she distractedly dropped the power emanating from her.

“Trying? I’m not one of the stealthy ones in the family Vanya!” He said as he closed the space between them.

“Could you try to take this seriously?” she asked exasperated.

“We both know there’s no way in hell I’m sneaking up on you out in a forest. Everything makes noise! Now if we were in the city, then maybe, but” he placed a hand on her shoulder, “that’s a bit risky with so many people around. And I figured it would be easier to just distract you into dropping your guard and get close that way.”

Her eyes went wide when she realized what he meant. She let out a small burst of energy and he skidded backwards.

“We both know I got you.” He said as he regained his balance.

“No, you didn’t, I’m still-“

“Vanya, you didn’t notice until I pointed it out. If this were real, I could have knocked you out easily. Without a sedative. So, in the interest of not strangling you again, are we good?”

“Fine.” She said after a few moments of contemplation. “But if this were real that may not have worked, you –“

“I know, I know. But if this were real I’d just adapt to the situation and my surroundings again, and all that shit Dad always went on about.”

They agreed that Luther technically got her and parted ways. Diego and Five still needed to try, so she pulled forth her power and continued walking. After about 20 minutes of not seeing or hearing them, she started to wonder if they were actually trying or were just waiting for her to drop her guard like Luther had. She was determined to not let the others get by on a technicality, so she kept some energy waves around herself. 

She heard something on either side of her, she looked and saw two knives coming at her from her left and right. She let out a burst of energy to send them off course and watched them fly backwards, only for their trajectories to change once again and start heading for her. She kept blasting them off course only to have their trajectories change back each time. Where was Diego? And how long could he continue changing the trajectory of the same objects? She blasted both knives off course again, sending them both high in the air away from her and now directly in front of her. Their trajectories changed again and they were heading straight for her. This was starting to get annoying.

She looked up at them, ready to blast them away again when she felt something be pressed firmly in front of her mouth and nose, and an arm wrap around her middle holding her in place. She panicked, and the energy she was about to send towards the knives just emanated from her in a small blast. She heard Diego grunt when it hit him, but he didn’t loosen his grip.

* * *

Diego felt the energy blast hit him and grunted in pain. That shit hurt, but he didn’t let himself lose focus. He curved the knives so they dug themselves into the ground before they could hit Vanya. The ground and trees started to shake, and he realized she was panicking.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.” He said, trying to reassure her that she wasn’t in real danger. He felt her start to claw at his hand that was holding the cloth over her face. It wasn’t a coordinated or well thought out attempt, it was just the desperation that came when you couldn’t breathe. Like when you were under water but still tried to gasp for air; he was very familiar with it. 

“It’s okay, V.” He said again, but she seemed so scared that this was breaking his heart. Her arms fell to her sides and she went limp. Diego quickly shifted to support her weight, and immediately removed the cloth from her face. He didn’t want her to breathe in any more than was necessary. He pocketed the cloth and used his now free hand to support her head.

“It’s okay. I’ve got you, sis. It’s okay.” He mumbled to the top of her head. He took a moment to collect himself and fight back the tears that were threatening to spill over. He scooped her up and started heading back.

He met up with Luther in the clearing they had started in.

“You both okay?” Luther asked, looking Diego over for injuries.

“Yeah, we’re both good. And I didn’t do it on a technicality.” Diego pointed out. Luther rolled his eyes. 

“Have you seen Five? We should call it a day.” Luther asked, Diego shook his head, which prompted Luther to just call out for him “FIVE!”

“Jesus Luther!” Diego exclaimed, not expecting his brother to yell loud enough to cause an echo in the forest. Vanya started to wake up and opened her eyes.

“You good?” Luther asked her. Five blinked into the clearing next to them, looking ready for a fight.

“Why did you yell so loud?” she mumbled.

“I didn’t know how far away Five was.” Luther answered.

“What the hell Luther! I thought one of you was dying!” Five exclaimed.

“Shit, did I hurt anyone?” Vanya asked, suddenly wide awake as she wiggled out of Diego’s arms. Diego helped her get steady with both feet on the ground.

“No, we’re fine.” Diego said.

“It could have also been a bear. Or a mountain lion, which there are several out here!” Five added.

“Wait, really?” Vanya asked.

“I could fight a mountain lion.” Diego said with confidence.

“Not this again. Come on, let’s head back.” Luther said.

“No, I’m good, we can still-“ Vanya started.

“What did we say about not pushing yourself?” Diego asked.

“I’m not! I don’t have a headache or anything!” she exclaimed.

“What’s eighty-seven minus forty-three?” Luther asked her un-expectantly.

“Uh…” Vanya said as she tried to concentrate. 

“Yeah, no, you’re done for the day.” He said in his Number One voice, indicating that this discussion was over.

They made their way back to the cabin, with Diego and Five flanking her as if they expected her to pass out any moment. They found Klaus on his bed, reading a book with headphones on. Vanya asked if it was okay if she practiced in their room (she still didn’t feel comfortable practicing in common spaces, common spaces at the Academy were never for her to take up space and she often practiced in her room if her family was around. She still felt this way, like she shouldn’t take up so much space in the living room). Klaus said it was fine and removed his headphones, opting to have her music drown out the ghosts instead.

* * *

The next day the training resumed. After some exercises they resumed with the ‘in case Vanya loses control’ training. After Vanya left, Luther and Diego purposefully stayed behind in the clearing, making it clear to Five that if he wasn’t going to sit it out then he had to try.

Unbeknownst to his siblings, Five actually had been following them for most of the training the previous day. He was used to wild terrain after living in the apocalypse, and went unnoticed. He had seen how Luther technically got out of really trying, though Luther’s technique would also be the one most likely to cause harm so Five couldn’t blame him. He had followed Diego for some time, and realized the idiot didn’t notice he was being stalked by a mountain lion. Five had blinked next to the animal, grabbed it, and blinked it as far away as he could before blinking back. Diego may be confident in his abilities to fight wild predators, but that was not something Five wanted to find out. He did not need his brother to be disemboweled after everything he had done to make sure Diego has lived this long.

He had watched Diego sneak up behind Vanya, and watched his brother fight back tears in the process. Five had been lost in his thoughts when he heard Luther yell at the top of his lungs. He really had been concerned that one of the predators he had seen earlier had found his siblings, and blinked over ready to fight.

Now he was quietly following Vanya. Her eyes were glowing and she was maintaining a small field of energy around her, but it was only enough to make the trees and leaves barely shake. He knew she could amplify it at a moments notice though. He was waiting for her to walk into a clearing. He had seen how she caused the trees to shake violently when Diego snuck up on her, and he didn’t want to risk having a branch fall on them. 

She finally walked into the middle of one and he took his chance. He blinked directly behind her and pressed the cloth over her face and wrapped his other arm around her middle, just as he had seen Diego do. He felt a wave of energy hit him. It hurt, but it was nowhere near as painful as the theatre. She had called him out for not really trying at the theatre, but she wasn’t giving it her all this time either; he knew she didn’t want to hurt them. She struggled for a bit and tried to pry his hand away before passing out.

Five couldn’t support her weight, and instead stumbled backwards and ended up sitting on the ground. Vanya was in a half-lying half-sitting up position as she was propped up against him. He felt something wet run down his cheek. Realizing he was crying he wiped his eyes.

He sat there, trying to get ahold of himself. Trying not to think of the apocalypse. He grabbed her wrist to check for her pulse, relieved with every dull thrum he felt, a reminder that she was alive. He had found four of his siblings’ bodies within minutes of entering the apocalypse. He had searched for Ben and Vanya, but never found them. He learned later that Ben had died years previously. But he was never able to find Vanya, he never found her, he never – No! She’s alive. She’s here. His siblings were alive except for…except for…

Vanya started to wake up and he was abruptly taken out of his thoughts and brought back to the present. How long had he zoned out?

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Yeah, I’m good.” She said groggily as she sat up on her own. She turned to look at him and her face went from groggy to worried, “Are you okay?” she asked.

Shit. He must have looked scared. Five quickly arranged his face back into his usual indifference.

“Yeah, I’m fine. If you can walk let’s start heading back and find the others.” He said.

He helped her up and they made their way back to the clearing they started in. Back at the cabin Luther and Klaus cooked dinner while Five supervised, Vanya practiced, and Diego called Allison to update her on how they were all doing and to hear how she had been with her hectic schedule.


	13. I heard a rumor that was some bullshit manipulation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW : mentions of child abuse

The week of the concert they held off on further trainings at the Academy as Vanya was swamped with extra practice sessions. She had even missed their family meeting to discuss the updates to the D.S. Umbrella Manufacturing Co. businesses as the orchestra scheduled an extra session.

As a result, Luther was on his way to her apartment to have her sign off on the paperwork that still needed her signature. He made his way up the narrow staircase to her apartment and he realized he had never been in the building before since they usually just dropped her off or picked her up. He heard an animated voice coming from behind one of the doors in the hall. He saw Vanya’s door open and a teenager carrying a violin stepped out. He figured it must be one of her students. She immediately stopped when she saw Luther down the hall and bolted back into the apartment, shutting the door. He was almost at the door, contemplating how to not further scare the girl, when Vanya opened it and poked her head out.

“Oh, hi Luther.” She said giving him a smile, she then turned her head back into her apartment and he heard her say, “it’s okay Amy, it’s just my brother.”

Luther saw the teenager - Amy – standing behind Vanya.

“Sorry if I scared you.” He said, trying to come off as non-threatening as possible.

“Oh, no, it’s just, in this building you usually only see the usual suspects. Vanya, the old lady, Mr. Puddles. It was a surprise to see someone who wasn’t them.” she tried to play it off, “I’ll see you next week, Vanya!”

“Do you want me to walk with you to the subway?” Vanya offered, she didn’t want her to be alone if she was shaken up.

“Nope, I’m good, bye!” Amy said as she walked out the door and past Luther.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare her.” Luther said as Vanya closed the door behind him.

“Don’t worry about it, Five scared another one of my students even more. He blinked right into the living room, scared him so bad he broke a string. And it’s like she said, she just wasn’t expecting to see someone new around. She’s been my student for years and I think the only people she’s seen in that hall who weren’t carrying a violin have been Mrs. Kowalski and Mr. Puddles.” Vanya assured him. She knew he was self-conscious about how he came off to people due to his size.

“Years?” Luther asked.

“Yeah, she started when she was about 10. Now she’s almost 17. I still walk with her to the subway sometimes like when she was a kid. Do you want coffee or tea?” She said.

Luther realized that he had never asked her about her students. He knew they were important to her because although she had added therapy and trainings to her schedule, she made sure that her activities didn’t cut into her students’ time. And she also didn’t need to continue teaching if she didn’t want to, they were billionaires after all.

“Uh, tea please. How many students do you have?” he asked.

“Four now. It was five but the fifth left for college, he wanted to get used to the city before classes started.” She explained.

“Do you think you’ll take on another?” he asked.

“No, I’m taking a break from new students after the last one turned out to be, well, you know, not a great experience.” She explained.

“That’s an understatement.” Luther said. He went to help clean up her kitchen table so she had a place for the paperwork. “These marshmallows are hard as rocks.” he said as he picked up a bag of opened marshmallows.

“Well, Five never closes the bag so as a result he gets to eat stale marshmallows.” She said as she grabbed two mugs.

“Yeah, the apocalypse was a wasteland so I don’t think he had to pick up after himself for nearly five decades.” Luther qualified.

“I know, I don’t get on him about it or anything. But, he also hates wasting food so I’m not going to throw them out either. Even if it feels like they’ll break your teeth. Heating them up helps.” Vanya said as she handed him a cup of tea.

“Thanks,” he said as he took the cup, “So, here’s what you missed;” and he started going over the various updates and findings. 

As they were wrapping up Vanya asked;

“How has Klaus been?”

“What do you mean? Klaus is… Klaus.” Luther replied, confused.

“Yeah, but, he’s been drinking a lot more than usual recently. And, he didn’t want to hang out this week. He said it was because I should just focus on practicing but… has anything happened? Have you noticed anything?” she asked. 

She was worried, it wasn’t good when Klaus started to retreat. She and Diego had both tried to reach out to him, but they had to be careful to not come off too strong or else it may make him clam up and avoid them more.

“I, uh, no, I hadn’t noticed. But I’ll uh, try to see if anything’s up.” Luther said.

“Okay, but, if you do just… do it as Luther, not as Number One.” Vanya said.

“What does that mean?” he asked, not sure if he should be offended.

“Luther is our caring brother. Nice guy, a real pleasure to know. Number One just demands people do what he says and feels like he needs to be in charge. He’s very controlling.” She explained.

“I am not!” He defended. She raised a finger towards him.

“That’s your Number One voice. Don’t do that, or it could just send him in the opposite direction.” She tried to explain.

“I’ll try.” He said while rolling his eyes. He was a bit offended. But as he drove home, he realized the distinction she was trying to make. Number One had accused his siblings of murdering their father the day of the funeral. Luther had carried a drunk Five and his mannequin wife to Diego’s place to sleep it off. Number One had locked Vanya in the basement. Luther apologized to her.

* * *

Allison arrived at the Academy Friday evening. The siblings were going to (try to) have a nice family dinner together the night before the concert as Allison demanded to see them all, having felt sad that she had to miss so much by living so far away. Luther picked her up from the airport. He was finally starting to act like his old self around her again, and not just self-consciously awkward after their talk about them. She was now sitting in the library with Luther, Klaus and Five. Five was hogging the new pictures of Claire she had brought. They heard the front door open and Allison got up to greet Vanya and Diego, who had just come from Vanya’s final practice before the concert. She saw them in the foyer; Vanya had her violin strapped behind her back.

Vanya’s face lit up when she saw Allison, quickly closing the space between them as fast as her short legs allowed, wrapping her in a hug. Allison’s heart swelled as she returned the hug, resting her head on top of her shorter sisters. She was so happy that she and Vanya had gotten closer. They had always loved each other, but their relationship was rocky at best. Now, she didn’t have the words to describe how important she was to her, how much she appreciated having her sister in her life again. It was like her relationship with her sister made her life seem…warmer. And Vanya, once so timid and hesitant (partly because of the medication, and partly because of how they had treated her) now freely expressed her love to Allison, no longer scared of being rebuked. 

Diego just gave her a brief ‘Hi Allison’ as he walked past them, the hug lasting longer than he was willing to wait for a more polite greeting.

“Hi Diego.” Allison said as she released the hug. They started to walk into the library, and Allison noticed that Five had finally passed the photos over to Klaus.

“Busy last few weeks for you,” Allison said to Vanya, “concert, training, and everything. How have you been feeling? Anymore headaches?”

“No, I’ve been fine.” Vanya replied, “and I know what you’re doing.”

“What am I doing?” Allison asked innocently.

“You’re going to try to claim that I’ve been overdoing it as an excuse to get out of practicing for if I get out of control again.” Vanya explained.

“I do think that you’ve been overdoing it, but I’m not trying to ‘get out’ of anything. If anything, I think the trainings have shown that we can intervene if anything happens. Your powers were a surprise the first time, but we’re prepared now.” They had reached the couches in the library but neither of them sat down, “But, if you want me to try sometime this weekend too, I will. But only if you promise that you’ll start being less intense about this stuff, you’re not as dangerous as you think you are.” Allison said.

“Fine, I’ll be ‘less intense,’” Vanya said with air quotes, “but I am dangerous, you can’t hesita-“

“I heard a rumor you fell asleep.” Allison said, cutting her off midsentence. 

The others had only been partially paying attention to their discussion, but their heads shot up when they heard the rumor. They saw the rumor take hold, turning Vanya’s eyes a cloudy white before she fell forward into Allison’s waiting arms.

“What the hell?” asked Luther.

“She’s fine.” Said Allison nonchalantly, still holding Vanya up. 

Diego had a look of surprise on his face as he took the violin from Vanya so Allison could set her down. He placed it on the table as Allison put Vanya in a sitting position at the end of the couch next to Klaus.

“Well, you didn’t hesitate.” Five said impressed.

“How long will it last?” Klaus asked as he snapped his fingers in front of Vanya’s face.

“Not sure. But she wasn’t going to let this ‘practice’ drop, so I figured it was better to do it now so she could just stop ruminating on it.” Allison replied, she did not take her rumors lightly.

“Are those new pictures of Claire?” Diego asked, spotting the photos in Klaus’s hand.

“Yeah, super-precious.” Klaus said as he handed the photos to Diego, who then sat down on the other couch next to Five to flip through them.

“Should we try to wake her up?” Luther asked, still with a look of concern.

“Probably.” Answered Five.

“I have an idea!” Klaus said excitedly as he set down his drink, jumped off the couch and ran to one of the ornate boxes on the shelves.

“Oh, that’s gonna suck.” Luther said as he realized what Klaus had just retrieved.

“Better ideas are not welcome, as I want to see her reaction.” Klaus warned as he returned with the smelling salts.

Growing up in a home where every week involved some kind of fighting scenario, smelling salts were placed throughout the house as getting knocked out or passing out was a common occurrence. However, the sudden shock was not pleasant.

Klaus opened the packet and held it under Vanya’s nose. After a moment she jerked awake and inhaled sharply, her eyes wide as she took in the scene. They all started to laugh at her reaction.

“Morning sunshine!” Klaus said cheerily, “That’s a real bitch of a wake up call, isn’t it?”

“Yeah.” Said Vanya, who was trying to get her heart to stop pounding.

“I’m sorry, you were saying something about me not hesitating?” Allison said sarcastically.

“Point made.” Vanya told her.

“Are we good?” Allison asked.

“Yeah, yeah, we’re good. Holy shit.” Vanya said as she pulled a face of disgust.

“Yeah, that’s not a pleasant way to wake up.” Luther said while chuckling.

Diego looked over to Allison as he passed the photos to Luther.

“Your kid is adorable.” He told her.

“She really is.” Allison said with a smile.

“It seems like you’re able to see her more often, if Patrick’s been bringing her to the set sometimes.” Luther said.

“Yeah, it’s nice. He said she’s been asking for me so he’ll bring her by even when I don’t have visitation.” Allison said.

“Have you two been getting along better?” Luther asked hesitantly.

“Not like that,” Allison said while rolling her eyes, “we just both want what’s best for her. And undoing the rumor seemed to make him hate me a little less. That and he said it was like I was different after the funeral, that I had really changed.”

“Well it had been two years for you so you really did change a lot.” Said Diego.

“Oh, he found that out.” Allison said.

“What?” Five asked sharply.

“It was months ago, when he picked Claire up from my visitation. He saw mine and Ray’s wedding photo and was freaked out, he realized something was up. We had a long conversation on the phone that night, that was still when he wouldn’t trust me face to face, and I told him about Dallas – not everything –“ she interceded when she saw Five’s face as he was likely about to yell about timelines – “just about accidentally being stuck there for two years and what happened. Nothing apocalyptic. He was definitely shocked, but he’s used to weird stuff with me by now. He just said he should have known that there was no way I could have changed that much in a week.”

“He didn’t try to ax your visitation after that?” Diego asked incredulously, “I was sent to the asylum for less.”

“No, because I was completely honest. And it’s easy to find records of ‘Allison Chestnut,’ though my disappearance also seemed to give rise to a few conspiracy theories at the time too. But Claire wants me in her life, and he agrees that it’s better for us to try to work out what’s best for her. So, I’m working on being honest and he’s been working on not being a dick.” She explained, and shared a smile with Vanya when she heard her laugh at the ending.

“How’s the outlook on custody?” Luther asked.

“I’ve been doing everything the court has required, so hopefully I can get custody soon.” Allison answered.

“Why not just fight the custody case again now? Even if you’re not okay with rumoring people, this family has enough money and influence to win any case.” Five asked casually.

“I wouldn’t do that.” Allison said, her face was serious.

“Why not? You’ve obviously been meeting the courts requirements so far. And you want custody, why not fight for it again now that you are an actual billionaire?” Five continued, not catching on.

“Because that’s abusive! I’m not going to be like Dad.” Allison replied.

“What are you talking about? ‘Be like Dad?’” Asked Five. 

“That’s how Dad– “ she took a deep steadying breath, “That’s how Dad was able to … do what he did to us; money and influence. We were babies, and he adopted us by just offering any price. Our names on our birth certificates are our numbers and no one batted an eye! We were secluded, homeschooled our whole lives, treated like property. . . and no one ever intervened or checked in on us. We never received a visit from CPS or DCFS, no one ever audited his homeschooling. He advertised us as superheroes, sent us all around the world and put us in dangerous situations as kids, and no one cared. He bought us, used money and influence to make sure no one stopped him from doing what he wanted with us, and advertised us as heroes so no one saw us as people. No one tried to see if we were safe, or okay, or… or anything.”

Klaus hugged her as she fought back tears.

“If I get custody it’s going to be because I am what’s right for her. Not because I forced my way with money instead of rumors.” Allison finished.

“Hey,” Diego said, grabbing her attention, “you sound like a really good mom right now. Really caring about Claire as a person. You’re not like Dad.”

“Yeah, just full of love.” Klaus added, hugging her tighter.

“Thanks.” Allison said, patting Klaus’s arm.

“Fine, take the high road. But just know that if you don’t want to get your hands dirty, others are willing to take the low road for you.” Five said, causing Allison to snort laugh while politely acknowledging, but declining his offer while wiping her eyes.

“My favorite picture so far,” Luther started holding the photos up, trying to lighten the mood, “has got to be the one at the aquarium.”

“The one where she looks like she’s trying to waddle like a penguin?” Five asked.

“Yes!” Luther exclaimed.

“Let me see!” Vanya begged as she reached for the photos.

The conversation turned happier, as they debated over which picture was the cutest. And then later as they sat down for dinner, whether Diego could win against a mountain lion, and if Pluto should regain its planetary status. At some point it was pointed out how they all, even as adults automatically went to their assigned seating arrangements.

“I didn’t even question it.” Vanya said at the end of the table.

“We’re like Pavlov’s dogs.” Said Klaus “We thought we beat the conditioning but then spontaneous recovery occurs when we don’t expect it.” He ended his profound statement with a sip of his drink.

“I can’t believe we sat like this every day.” Allison said.

“Especially since the seating arrangement was just more bullshit manipulation by Dad.” Klaus added.

“What do you mean?” Diego asked. Five turned to him.

“Are you serious?” Five asked him.

“Seriously, what are you talking about?” Luther asked.

Allison, Klaus, Five, and Vanya looked at each other, each realizing that their brothers never caught on in all those years. Allison turned back to Luther and Diego, about to explain the obvious, when Klaus put a hand on her shoulder.

“Please,” Klaus said with a look of earnest, “let me be the one to ruin this for them.” 

Allison waved her hand as an offer for him to proceed. Klaus got a look of excitement on his face. He stood up and motioned for Allison to do the same. He took her arm and guided her to the other side of the table where he prompted Diego to stand up, and then had Allison sit in his chair. He then guided Diego back to the other side of the table and had him sit in Allison’s chair. Once Klaus retook his own seat he proceeded.

“If it was based on numbers, like it is at the end of the table,” he gestured towards Five and Vanya, as well as Ben’s empty chair, “then the seating arrangements should have been like this. Even numbers on one side” he swept his arm to indicate himself and Diego, “and odd numbers on the other side, with Number Seven at the end.” He then swept his other arm to flourish the side with Luther, Allison, and Five.

“Okay, I guess that makes sense. But that’s not how it was.” Luther said slowly.

“Yeah, why was it bullshit manipulation?” Diego asked.

“Because, my dear Diego, having the seating based on number would mean that you would be sitting next to Dad, on his left hand side. But instead, rather than just having Luther as a metaphorical barrier between you and Dad, he also made Luther a physical barrier.” Klaus explained.

Luther and Diego stared at each other. Neither of them had ever noticed that.

“You all knew?” Diego burst out.

“It was a bit obvious.” Said Five.

“Dad made you compete against Luther on everything, even proximity to him.” Allison explained.

“You all knew!?” Diego repeated.

“Well yeah, but it’s not just you and Luther that the seating manipulated. I mean, Dad also arranged it so that no one sat directly next to him,” Vanya pointed out, gesturing to the two seats next to the other end of the table that always remained empty, “and he had me at the end to separate me from the rest of you.”

“Wait, if he wanted me to be in-between him and Diego, why didn’t he just stick with the numbers and do 1 – 2 – 3 on one side, and then 4 - 5- 6 on the other side? Or have the numbers wrap around, have Klaus at the end and then 5-6-7?” Luther asked as he pointed to the seats.

“Because that would put me at the far end of the table. And if I tried to rumor him it was easier to stop me if I was close rather than at the far end.” Allison explained. 

“And that would have put me next to Dad, which may have caused the old bastard to kill himself sooner.” Added Klaus.

“And he also couldn’t have ordinary Vanya in a place of honor close to him. He needed to keep her the furthest away.” Five added.

“Holy shit.” Said Diego.

“So, now you both know. Bullshit manipulation.” Five said.

Diego turned to Allison.

“I don’t like it over here, let’s switch back.” He said.

“Fine,” Allison said laughing as she got up, “I’ll let you return to being the odd-man out amongst the odd-number side.”

“Oooh, good one.” Said Klaus.

“Yeah, yeah, thanks sis.” Diego said as he took his seat back.

They continued their dinner, and as the evening wound to an end, Diego and Vanya prepared to head out.

“Get a goodnights sleep, big day tomorrow!” Allison said as she hugged Vanya goodbye.

“Will do.” Vanya mumbled into her sisters shoulder.

“You should get some sleep too, Allison. You look exhausted.” Diego said.

“Wow, thanks.” Allison said sarcastically.

Diego closed his eyes and took a deep breath in through his nose, and let it out through his mouth, trying to remain calm.

“You know I didn’t mean it as an insult. You just flew in today after working yourself into the ground all month. Get some rest.” He said trying to keep his voice even but failing.

“Sorry, I’m not used to ‘concerned Diego.’” Allison replied.

“Well you know, after my time in the asylum, I’ve been trying to communicate with words instead of knives.” He joked.

“Love you, too.” Allison said as she wrapped him in a hug.

The drive back to Vanya’s apartment was quiet. Diego parked near the entrance. Vanya thanked him for the ride and turned around to the back seat to grab her violin, noticing Diego’s knife harness was also back there.

“You’re not going out tonight, are you?” she asked.

“Gotta keep the city safe.” He replied.

“Diego-“

“I’m a hero, Vanya. This is what hero’s do.”

“Okay, but you also need to sleep. You got onto Allison and I about getting rest and not overdoing it, but you’re not doing the same.”

“I’m fine, I just have a different sleep schedule from the rest of you.”

“Just… be safe.”

“Of course.” He lied. His patrols were never safe, but if he didn’t try to assure her she wouldn’t let it go. “See you tomorrow.”

She gave him a worried look before saying goodbye and exiting the car. Diego waited until he saw the light turn on in her apartment before driving off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: chapter titles may or may not make sense as they are bullshitted the day of


	14. Explosions (literal and figurative)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW child abuse

The five siblings sat in one of the balcony boxes. They opted for a box since, despite trying to be on their best behavior, would still fidget and make snide remarks to one another, which is frowned upon in the general audience. And they were billionaires so they could afford it. 

The first tussle was over the seating arrangements, as both Diego and Luther wanted to sit nearest to the door as it was the ‘weak point’ most likely where an attack would come from, and both insisted on being the first line of defense. Allison and Klaus ignored them, but Five made a presidential assassination joke to Diego, which he did not appreciate and led to the next whispered argument. Eventually Diego sat in the back nearest the door with Luther next to him, and the other three sat in the front row of seats. The next whispered argument came during the concert when Klaus pulled out a flask. Luther tried to confiscate it, insisting that this was not an appropriate time. Five telling them to shut up only furthered the now three-way-argument which continued until Allison threatened to rumor them if they didn’t shut up and confiscated the flask herself.

The concert came to an end and they made their way downstairs to meet up with Vanya. Back at the Academy they had pizza and drinks in the library, deciding on an act of defiance against their strict upbringing by not eating in one of the designated meal areas. They sat around the coffee table, some of them opting for the floor while others sat on the couches. They laughed when Vanya dramatically and defiantly removed her drink from the coaster and placed it directly on the table. Luther noticed her almost instant look of worry.

“That’s really bugging you now, isn’t it?” He asked her while laughing.

“Yes,” she replied as she moved her drink back to the coaster and wiped the spot with her sleeve, “it could leave a mark.”

That caused them to all laugh again, and Diego to pull out a knife and throw it onto the table, letting it dig deep into the wood.

“Doesn’t matter.” He said.

“Such a rebel.” Allison said. She was sitting on the floor next to Klaus, painting his nails.

“Really proven yourself as the family badass.” Added Klaus.

“Damn right.” Diego agreed.

The siblings sat in the library for hours, no one wanted to leave and they were all enjoying the time together more than they would ever admit. They were all staying at the Academy that night, so it’s not like any of them had to leave either. 

This was the happiest Luther had been in a long time, having his family here with him and safe. The past few months they had all been trying to figure out how to be a family. They had the love part down, but none of them were good with communicating and had to learn how to be part of each other’s lives. But losing each other, time and again, made them try harder to figure it out. None of them wanted to be as distant as they were before. Looking around at them in the library, happy and laughing together, he felt that maybe this time they were safe. Five was assimilating to the present, Vanya was getting used to her powers, Allison had worked hard on being the person she wanted to be without rumors, and Diego was managing his anger better. He was still concerned about Klaus. After his conversation with Vanya he did notice that Klaus did seem to be drinking more and had taken to walking around the Academy with his headphones on. On more than one occasion Luther had seen him yelling at thin air to shut up, but when Luther asked if the ghosts were bothering him Klaus had just said it was the usual and he was fine. Luther wasn’t sure how to help and just hoped that whatever ghost was harassing him would just move on (Luther did try to say that throughout the Academy, he felt ridiculous but he had no clue where the ghost was so he would sometimes ask the air to just move on and leave his brother alone).

****

A few days after the concert all of the siblings were back at the cabin for some larger scale training for Vanya. Though Vanya kept her promise to Allison and was less intense about it. While a cabin in the middle of the woods was far from luxurious, they enjoyed their time there though most of them wouldn’t admit. Luther liked the familiarity of their childhood trainings, Diego took the opportunity to hone his own powers, Allison liked being able to spend time with her family away from paparazzi, Klaus enjoyed antagonizing his siblings as they trained while he sat out on account of there ‘not being ghosts around’ (which no one could disprove), Five enjoyed having his family (for the most part) altogether, and Vanya enjoyed the fact that her family was there for her.

Near the end of the days training, Five wanted to see if Vanya could recreate what she was able to do in Dallas against the Swedes. It was only after Five had assured everyone that he could blink Diego away in time did they agree. For the most part, Vanya had been holding back her powers during training out of fear. Her siblings insisted that she needed to practice using them in a greater capacity so she could learn how to control greater use of her powers. Which, in turn, would reduce the risk of her using too much force by accident if she learned to have a feel for it.

To create the scenario of the cornfield, Diego would throw a knife at Vanya. If she didn’t deflect it in time he would curve it away from her. If she did manage to make it explode, Five would blink himself and Diego to where the others were waiting a good 1000 feet away.

“Are you sure they’re far enough?” Vanya called, still a bit uneasy.

“Yes! You only managed a roughly 400-foot circle last time! And that was a wimpy cornfield! Not an old growth forest!” Five insisted.

“Are you sure you’re far enough?” She asked.

“I can get us out of the vicinity in time!” Five yelled back, as he gripped Diego’s arm.

“Let’s just back up a little more, just in case.” Diego said as he took a few more steps back. “You ready?” He called to Vanya.

“No.” Vanya yelled back.

“Good enough!” Diego shouted as he threw the knife towards her. He watched as it got closer and closer… any moment now she would blast it and Five would blink them away… any moment… shit! Diego curved the knife before it could hit her.

“The hell are you freezing up for?” He yelled.

“I said I wasn’t ready!” 

“You deflected a bullet last time without warning!” Five yelled back.

“That was very different circumstances!”

“Oh my god,” Diego muttered, and then yelled “are you ready now?” 

This was nerve wracking for him too. In a situation where the best case scenario was getting nauseous from a blink, and the two worst case scenarios were either accidentally stabbing his sister or getting blown up, he wanted to get this over with.

Vanya took a few deep breaths before answering.

“Yes!” She called back. 

Five tightened his grip on Diego’s arm, and Diego threw another knife. It was getting closer… closer… Vanya reached an arm out with her hand facing the knife that was coming towards her. Diego was about to curve it again, thinking it was about to go right through her palm, when white energy appeared in front of her hand and the knife shattered.

Diego was immediately transported to another area of the forest and felt very nauseous. Jumping through space was a bitch, how the hell did Five seem fine every time he did it? He suddenly felt a strong breeze and then almost immediately he was being pulled down to the ground. He wasn’t sure what was going on but he felt his siblings around him on the ground and he tried to cover whoever was near him as best he could. There was the thundering noise of dozens of trees falling, which slowly became just the creaking of a few branches losing their fight with gravity. They all slowly began to lift their heads and take inventory to see if anyone was hurt.

“Guys, is everyone okay?” they could hear Vanya shout in the distance. They took a few moments to respond as they all tried to stand up, but that was too long.

“GUYS!?” She yelled again, panicked this time.

“WE’RE FINE!” Luther shouted back knowing she was thinking the worse. They all started walking towards her, but after about 300 feet they saw the first fallen tree. 

“Holy shit.” Said Luther, as the circle of destruction came into view. About 500 feet around the epicenter the trees were completely leveled, and around the edges a few more trees had fallen in a domino effect. They saw Vanya scrambling over the fallen trees, trying to get to them.

“Vanya!” Allison called.

“Are you okay!?” Vanya called back.

“Yeah, all of us are okay, but Vanya, you can fly! Why are you trying to climb over?” Allison asked. Vanya stopped.

“I forgot.” She answered, causing Klaus to laugh. A moment later she was flying slightly above fallen trees and landed right in front of them.

“Is everyone-“ she started.

“We’re all fine!” Diego snapped. How many times was she going to ask?

“Overkill much, Vanya?” Klaus asked.

“At least we have plenty of firewood.” Luther said.

“It is pretty cool.” Allison said with a smirk as she looked over the near perfect circle.

“How wide did you intend it to be?” Five asked.

“I tried to make it the same as last time.” Vanya answered.

“Looks a bit bigger, and with trees instead of corn…” Five said.

“Overkill.” Vanya said, repeating Klaus’s sentiments.

“More like you still need to get a feel for the bigger stuff.” Five answered, knowing she was going to fret over this.

“And considering what we know you can do, this is still really great control!” Allison tried to assure her.

“Yay, Vanya can make crop circles out of trees! Can we call it a day now?” Klaus asked sarcastically. 

“Yeah, let’s head back.” Luther said as he broke off a chunk of the nearest tree.

***

Back at the cabin they had a large fire thanks to the freshly felled firewood. Unfortunately, despite the otherwise cozy atmosphere that should have taken place around a warm fire after a long day outside, tensions were running high. Five had brought their Father’s journal and was flipping through it for ‘ideas,’ which did not go over well with the majority.

“Why did you even bring that thing?” Diego asked, clearly annoyed. 

“It’s useful.” Five answered plainly.

“Useful? It’s just filled with Dad’s awful experiments on us.” Diego said.

“Are you saying it wasn’t useful in helping us learn more about Vanya’s powers?” Five asked.

“Five.” Allison warned. She saw that this was heading for a fight, and dragging Vanya’s name into it was not the way to go.

“It was helpful in finding out the basics of what she could do! But in case you forgot, he stopped with just the basics! The rest is just filled with what he did to her, to all of us!” Diego exclaimed as he stalked closer to Five.

“Be resentful if you will, and sure he was an ass, but he still made us what we are. We can learn from this.” Five emphasized.

“That’s enough Five.” Luther said.

“Making us what we are isn’t exactly a good thing.” Allison said.

“Learn from it? What, are you planning to add evil scientist on top of assassin?” Diego spat back.

“Maybe we should just put it away.” Vanya said in a small voice.

“Five, give it here.” Luther ordered.

“No, I’m still reading it.” Five said in a tight voice. They were ganging up on him and he hated being told what to do. He was the oldest goddammit! Why did it bother them so much for him to have it out? They didn’t have to read it.

“I’m in charge and –“ Luther started.

“No, you’re not Number One. Dad put you in charge when we were kids so that we’d resent you instead of him.” Five cut him off.

“I am the leader of this family!” Luther said louder, which caused most of his siblings to scoff. Klaus and Vanya were still quiet.

“When are you going to realize that you weren’t a leader, Luther? You were just following Dad’s orders the entire time. You were just his puppet. And you’re still trying to figure out what to do without Dad to order you around. That’s not a leader Luther.” Five said as he tapped the journal.

Luther took three quick steps so he was towering over Five.

“Why do you have to be such a prick all the time?” Diego yelled at him. He knew Five was right, but that was a low hit.

“Everyone just knock it off and take a breather!” Vanya said, but was ignored.

“Why are you all so sensitive over a journal? What Dad did happened, ignoring his journal isn’t going to change that!” Five yelled back.

“Doesn’t mean we need a reminder of what he did to us!” Diego shouted.

“You think our childhoods were bad? Grow up, those were the freaking golden years for me!” Five shouted back.

“You can’t compare everything to the apocalypse!” Luther shouted at him.

“The apocalypse was 45 years of my life! What Dad did doesn’t even compare!” Five shouted back.

“What was the worst thing Dad did to you?” Klaus asked in a calm voice, causing everyone to turn their attention to him.

“What was the worst thing he did to you?” Klaus asked Five again after a few moments of silence. “That journal, his ‘study notes’ on his experiments, on us, is chock full of the horrible stuff he did. Some of it is detailed, like mine, other stuff is vague. You say those were your golden years, fine, but they were still bad, and most of us don’t like the reminder. What was the worst thing he did to you?”

Still no answer. Everyone was still staring at him, uncomfortable as the question he had asked Five had made them all recall their own experiments.

“No? Fine, I’ll go first. Worst thing he did to me is very detailed in that journal.” Klaus said as he pointed to the opened book. “I hated my power, still do, and Dad knew I was scared of the ghosts I would see. So what did he do? Get me some help to talk out the horrible things I saw or the stuff they would scream to me at all hours of the day? Nope! He started locking me in mausoleums, some good ol’ exposure therapy! In that journal he details how he can hear me screaming from the comfort of his car. That he’d just keep adding more hours to my time in there when he saw that I was still scared whenever he opened the door, and would lock me back in there. He knew it wasn’t working, but he kept doing it. Even started to write down when he noticed that I was getting drunk before our little private training sessions.”

Klaus finished and looked at Five expectantly. Luther and Diego had backed away from him slightly as they listened to Klaus. His brother remained quiet for once, so he looked around the room?

“Anyone else want to share?” Klaus asked, there were a few moments of silence.

“The isolation.” Vanya answered in a small voice, hugging her knees to her chest.

“Your own personal torture chamber.” Diego responded.

“No, not the – not the anechoic chamber.” She replied, causing everyone to look at her curiously. What the hell was worse than that? She had gone on a rampage because she was locked in there. “The chamber was awful, and I snapped when I was put in there again. But… being isolated from the rest of you was worse. And he orchestrated it ever since we were kids; excluding me from your meetings, your trainings, the family pictures, constantly telling me I was less than the rest of you… and he wrote about how he had enforced all of you to isolate me too. Being in a family but not part of it… that was worse.”

The siblings took in what she said. As kids they didn’t care about the effect their words and actions had. They knew that distancing themselves from her gained some favor from their father. And they could make themselves feel better in that hellish home by the reminding themselves, and her, that they were special. They didn’t intend to make her feel like she wasn’t their family, their sister. 

Allison wrapped an arm around her in a hug.

“He would make me rumor people. Politicians, heads of state, business competition, or anyone else he wanted something from. One time, it was a photographer who took an unflattering photo of him. He would usually take me with him to meet with people before or after a mission. Everyone wanted to meet one of the superheroes! He would tell me who to rumor and what to say beforehand. But never why. I was just supposed to do it, and not question him just like everything else in our lives. Sometimes he would have it played off as a party trick. The rumor would seem innocent enough in those cases, but it wasn’t. I’ll never know the full effect of what I’ve done, or how many lives I ruined. It started becoming obvious what was happening, that Dad somehow always got his way when I was around. So ‘the rumor’ about me spread, and people never trust me face-to-face now.”

Vanya tightened their hug slightly as a sign of support. 

“That explains Dad’s vague notes of how you became ‘less useful for meetings and discussions.’ Care to share now?” Klaus asked Five. “Our childhoods were shit, Five. Even if your life just got progressively shittier. Or would you like to tell us about the ‘spatial jumps in stressful situations’ experiments he noted about you? Or the ‘exhaustion tests’? If it wasn’t so bad, why not share? If you don’t mind being reminded of it?”

“Klaus…” Vanya warned. She knew Five’s private trainings could get bad. Maybe not as bad as the apocalypse, but still bad. There had been many times when he was on edge after such training and she and Ben had tried to calm him down. Even as a child, Five usually wore a facial expression of indifference or annoyance. So if he looked scared after a training… it was bad.

“If it wasn’t so bad, you wouldn’t have trouble saying what it was.” Klaus said.

“Spatial jumps until I passed out, to test my limits. Hurt like hell but I survived. And it was useful! I improved my abilities because of it.” Five answered, responding to the taunt.

“Yeah? Still sounds awful. And what was the stressful situations training?” Klaus asked, but then he noticed Five clench his fists. Shit, maybe it was bad and the little gremlin needed the denial to cope. Five didn’t usually display signs of stress that openly. “You don’t have to answer, knowing Dad it was probably something scary and painful. The journal is just a reminder to all of us that the man we call ‘Dad’, who was supposed to protect us, just treated us like lab rats. When we were kids we could pretend that he might have loved us, but with what’s written in there… we know he never did.”

“He pushed me off the roof.” Five answered.

“What?” Luther asked surprised.

“No warning just pushed me off. He wanted me to be able to do a spatial jump un-expectantly in stressful situations.”

“He could have killed you!” Luther exclaimed.

“How old were you?” Allison asked, concerned.

“Eleven the first time.” Five answered.

“The first time?” Diego asked.

“After the roof he knew I’d be expecting it if we went up there again. So he got creative; open windows, closed windows, off the staircase landing. It was-“ 

He was about to lie and say it wasn’t a big deal, but then he made the mistake of making eye contact with Vanya. On one of the occasions he found himself plummeting to the ground after Dad threw him through a window, he had heard her playing the violin; something familiar and safe. And instead of blinking onto his own bed for a soft landing, he blinked above hers and belly flopped onto Ben who had been in her room crying. Thoroughly freaking both of them out and causing The Horror to appear which had knocked Vanya to the ground and wrapped one tentacle around Five. Vanya had scrambled to her feet and rushed to Ben, climbing over the tentacles as she went, to calm him down. Ben was crying even harder at that point, and Five was still in shock at nearly dying twice. Once Ben had calmed down and The Horror returned, Vanya had asked Five if he was okay. He just asked if she could continue playing as he shook. He never did tell them what Dad did. 

“It was bad but… it prepared me to survive. I don’t know how many building collapses I was in during the apocalypse… but I survived.” Five said. 

“It was still an awful thing to do to you, especially for someone who made us call him ‘Dad’.” Diego said.

Five clenched his jaw and avoided eye contact with everyone. When they saw his body language they realized how bad it really was for him, even if he wouldn’t admit it. Maybe he just didn’t want to admit it to himself. 

“Endurance testing.” Luther said, trying to take the attention away from Five so his brother could try to gather himself, “Constantly increasing the weight of how much I could lift or carry… or how long I could endure holding something up. It wouldn’t stop until I got injured… sprains, pulled muscles, or just passing out. Whatever weight I failed at would be the next trainings goal.”

Something their Father wrote in the journal now took on a much darker meaning; ‘Eager to please and obey, seeks approval regardless of self-interest.’ Most of them took it as Luther being a kiss-up to Dad and doing whatever Dad wanted him to do even if it wasn’t what he wanted. Now they understood that ‘regardless of self-interest’ was referring to bodily harm… of his own self-preservation.

“I always thought it was strange that you were in the infirmary so often.” Vanya said quietly. Their brother was nearly indestructible; he could take a hit 20x what would kill an ordinary person and walk away fine.

“Yeah, all of you brought that up at some time when we were kids. But I… I didn’t want to admit that I failed my training, so I would have some excuse or other.” Luther said.

“That’s wasn’t failing, Luther. Dad tested you until you broke. Literally. That was his goal. There was no way to win.” Diego told him.

“Thanks.” Luther said, clapping a hand on Diego’s shoulder.

“I think we all know the worst thing he did to Ben.” Allison said.

“Made him kill.” Five answered.

“Yeah, Ben hated it. He always tried to avoid it when he could, even when Dad gave him an order.” Klaus added.

“But then if any of us got hurt, or the mission went on for too long, Dad would blame him. Say it was his fault for not working with the team, for not unleashing the Horror.” Diego said.

“He hated that codename. The Horror. It was cruel of Dad to do that… Ben already thought he was a monster, and then Dad called him that for all of your toy lines and comic books.” Vanya said.

“He always tried to separate himself from it. Would call his powers The Horror, never himself. The name didn’t even fit him at all, he was always the most… well not kind, he could be a real asshole most of the time-“ Luther said.

“Here, here!” Klaus interceded as he raised his flask.

“-but he was the most caring among us.” Luther finished.

There was a general murmur of agreement amongst the siblings. The room grew quiet again and there was only one sibling left; but no one was going to press Diego about the worst thing Dad did to him. The journal wasn’t clear on what would be the worst thing to him, whatever had scarred Diego was barely a footnote to their Father. But they all knew that he hated using one of his abilities, and it wasn’t hard to guess that it would be due to his private trainings.

“He would test how long I could hold my breath. That was the worst thing.” Diego said after awhile. 

“I thought you could hold your breath indefinitely?” Luther asked.

“Probably could if air was the only thing a human body needed.” Diego said, “At first it was just how long I could stay under water in the pool, I could swim back up on my own when I had enough. But later it became a tank, like at magic shows. He’d lock the top so I couldn’t get out, couldn’t tap out. He said it was the only way to truly gauge my powers abilities, not just my mental ability to stay under. He’d have me hooked up to machines with the wires running through a small hole at the top. I’d be in there for days until I finally just passed out either due to exhaustion or hunger. And then I’d wake up in the infirmary. I really thought I was going to die most of the time. An experiment that took days wasn’t worth Sir Reginald’s time to sit and monitor, he didn’t think it was worth Mom’s or Pogo’s time either. So I’d be alone for days under water, terrified of falling asleep. He must have had some alarm for whenever I passed out though, because I always woke up. Eventually I just stopped playing his game. I couldn’t stop him from locking me in, but I wouldn’t hold my breath. He’d watch me drown, I’d wake up, he’d yell at me, rinse and repeat. I knew there was a chance that he’d let it happen… let me die for disobeying him. But I figured a quick death would be better than waiting days for it. After the 43rd time of that, breath tests were removed from my training.” 

His siblings looked horrified. It was quiet for awhile.

“Diego…” Vanya said quietly, but at a loss for words.

“Holy shit.” Klaus murmured.

“Yeah, what Klaus said.” Agreed Five.

Allison stood up as her face turned from horrified to sympathetic. She walked up to Diego and wrapped him in a hug. 

“I’m sorry.” She told him. She was sorry that happened to him, sorry that none of them knew why he would disappear for days, sorry for the abuse he went through.

Diego usually ignored emotional stuff, or rather, chose to react in anger if anything got emotional. But in that moment, he really appreciated the comfort Allison offered. So instead, he returned the hug and buried his face in her hair as she rested her chin on his shoulder.

“Thanks.” He muttered. 

He felt more arms wrap around them as his siblings joined in.

“You’re not getting out of this, Five.” He heard Klaus say and felt someone being tugged into the group. He could just imagine Five’s face, looking surly, but secretly happy to be included.

“God, that man was awful. I don’t think he did a single good thing in his life.” Klaus said.

“He brought us together.” Vanya said quietly, “He did it for selfish reasons, but… he made us a family.”

“I’m glad about that at least.” Luther said.

“Agreed.” Diego muttered from the center of the hug.

“Yeah.” Said Five.

“Love you guys.” Allison said.

“Same.” Said Klaus.

***

The next day Vanya agreed to taking it easy; she had created a sizable circle of destruction the day before and her siblings were apprehensive of her doing anything large-scale the following day lest she pass out again. So after an hour or so of smaller scale practice, they called it a day for her powers. Diego and Five were trying to teach her how to throw knives, using the trees as targets. Klaus watched them, but had his Walkman on as the ghosts that haunted them were getting loud.

Luther had grabbed a few more of the fallen trees from yesterday and was now aggressively cutting more firewood than they would probably need for a year. Allison was reading over her latest script when she saw him walk by to grab his third replacement ax. With a sigh, she put the script down and followed him back to his ever-growing pile of firewood.

“What’s got you so bothered?” She asked him.

“What do you mean?” Luther asked back. She gestured to the three trees worth of wood that he was still adding to.

“What? It’s good to have a supply out here, and the trees were already felled by Vanya, not me, so it’s not like I’m killing the forest.” He replied.

She then gestured to the small hoard of broken axes near his feet and raised an eyebrow.

“That,” he said pointing to the broken tools, “is what happens when you have super-strength.” He justified.

“Hmm, except you are fully aware of your strength and you don’t break stuff by accident unless you’re upset. So, what’s bothering you?”

“Allison, it’s nothing.” He said.

“Don’t cut me out.” She said.

“I’m not, it just doesn’t concern you.” He replied.

“So what? You’re just not going to talk to me about anything important now?”

“What do you mean ‘now’?”

“After our talk about how we are siblings, and we are just going to be siblings.”

“That’s not– this doesn’t concern you.” 

“We used to tell each other everything.”

“Yeah, and then we grew up.” He replied, using the words she said to him around the time of their Father’s funeral against her.

“Wow. Okay, so what? Did you only talk to me because you were hoping we would end up together? Because I still care about you Luther, I still love you. Just not in that way.” She said.

Shit, had he really been avoiding telling her anything important, anything personal, after their talk? Even if they would never be a thing, he still loved her. She was still his best friend, she was still his sister. He had tried to be mature about it, thought he had been. She had been married twice, one of those marriages resulted in a daughter whom she loved more than life itself, and the other marriage was to who was commonly accepted as her true love. If she said that she figured out she didn’t love him that way, but still loved him, he was determined to respect her decision. She had been through a lot to figure it out. He had tried to be an adult about it, but he hadn’t realized how he had been cutting her out.

“No, of course not! I – of course I still love you! And care about you! It’s just,” he sighed and dug the blade of the ax into the nearest chunk of wood so it was propped up, “a bit of an identity crisis I guess.”

“Oh wow, not like I have any experience with that.” She said sarcastically, but in a kind and joking way. Allison had to find her identity plenty of times; when she moved out of the Academy, when she decided to stop using her power, when she was transported to the 1960’s. Find out who she was separate from the Academy, from her powers, and with considerably less rights.

“What is it?” She asked.

“What Five said yesterday. That I’m not a leader and I was just Dad’s puppet… is that true?”

Allison took a deep breath and let it out slowly. This was not going to be an easy conversation.

“Dad put you in charge when we were kids because he needed someone to lead when he wasn’t around, and there was no way he was going to put himself in the situations he threw us in. And yeah, he probably also did it so we would hold a grudge against you instead of him if anything happened. He would have you lecture Ben on using The Horror, Klaus on not fighting, or Diego for running off on his own. He used you as a buffer, and that… that wasn’t fair to you. He told you that our lives were your responsibility, and you didn’t deserve that burden, no kid does. But, you always did everything you could to keep us safe, to have us work together.” Allison said.

“So Dad’s puppet it is.” Luther said, shoving his hands into his pockets.

“No, not entirely. He used you, but you cared about us, about our wellbeing. And that part wasn’t Dad.” She said as she gently gripped his upper arm. “But Luther, we’re all adults now. And we know you love us, and care about us, but it is demeaning as an adult to have someone claim to be the leader of the family when – well we’re not all the same age now, but when we were all born on the same day. We’re not going to follow orders Luther, we’re going to discuss things as a family.”

“So I’m not needed is what you’re saying.”

“Oh my god, how did you interpret that from what I said? No! We need you as our brother, as an equal. Not as Dad’s appointed buffer-child or as Number One.”

“I am Number One though!”

“So what does that mean?” She asked him. He looked confused by the question, so she continued, “Does that make you better than the rest of us? Do you think Dad’s ranking system holds any merit? Diego’s second, I’m third, Vanya’s dead last.”

“No! I don’t think you guys are less than me! It’s just I’m One… I’m in charge.” He answered.

“That’s thinking of us as a team, not as a family. What’s so bad about not being a leader? About just being one of us?” She asked. 

“Nothing! I don’t think any of you are lesser than me! I’m just… used to…” he trailed off.

“Being in charge?” she finished.

“Yeah.”

“We’re adults, we don’t need anyone in charge of us. And besides, the times when we really needed you were as our brother, not as Dad’s designated leader. That’s the guy we need.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Believe it or not we need Luther more than we need Dad’s Number One. We need the guy who would sneak out with us to Griddy’s, sit and listen to us if we were having a bad day, move a couch to hide a chocolate stain on Dad’s ivory rug.”

“He still noticed and yelled at all of us the next morning.” 

“Yeah, but you didn’t snitch on Diego and Klaus. Showed real sibling solidarity. That’s the guy we need. Always have.”

“Thanks, that’s um… that’s really nice.” They needed him as himself, as Luther. Not as a team leader, or any other similar job. Just… himself. He was enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is fic is like all family bonding. i swear part 2 will have more of a plot


	15. Relapse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is long, I was going to break it into two parts but then that ended up not happening.
> 
> Pay attention to the trigger warnings on this one people. If any of them make you think "Hmm, no thanks" just skip to the end chapter notes for a summary of what happens without the details

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: drug use, relapse, overdose, PTSD, temporary character death

It had been a week since they returned home from the cabin, and Allison returned to LA. Klaus had his music on loud and was preparing his lunch in the kitchen. The last few weeks had been a nightmare. The ghosts had started to notice that his powers were getting stronger as he had built up more of a tolerance to the booze and pills he had been taking. As a result, they rarely left him alone and there was almost always one screaming at him.

Ghosts in the Academy were not a strange occurrence; there were several that had been there since he was a child. There was the woman that haunted what used to be a butcher shop and was now their kitchen, the man who haunted what used to be a Laundromat, and several haunted their bedrooms and training rooms. Most of those ghosts had given up on talking to Klaus over the years, realizing that he would do nothing for them as he continued to try to ignore them.

No, the ghosts that were a problem were the ones that haunted him and his siblings. During their time as superheroes, the Umbrella Academy murdered many people. For the most part his siblings simply did not care too much if their missions ended up killing someone. Dad had raised them to use deadly force, they were told those people were the bad guys, and they would be lauded as heroes by the public and media afterwards. So they saw nothing wrong with it, they were told time and again that it was okay; they were the good guys and their actions were justified. 

The only one it really seemed to bother was Ben, who was frequently thrown into situations intentionally for him to kill. His power was not very nuanced; he would be sent in to tear people apart and would emerge drenched in blood. He hated it. It was not uncommon to find Ben crying after a mission. If Ben really didn’t want to be found, he would hide in Vanya’s room, as there was rarely any reason for anyone to check on Vanya. Klaus and Vanya’s room shared a wall, and Klaus would sometimes hear Ben quietly lamenting to her about how awful he felt, trying not to be overheard lest Luther give him another lecture about duty, or Dad find him. If Ben started to cry, Vanya would play the violin to drown it out so the others couldn’t hear.

Klaus found some comfort that at least one of his siblings didn’t want to kill. It was similar to how he felt whenever Vanya cried when they stepped on bugs. That they at least appreciated another’s life, and didn’t see taking one as something that should be done on a whim. Because while Dad had turned them all into murderers, it was only Klaus who had to deal with the aftereffects. Had to see the people they killed follow them, haunt them. Had them yell at him for what they had done, hear them graphically describe what they wish they could do to his family for revenge. While some of their victims would move on after a few days or weeks, others would last months and sometimes years.

He never told his siblings this. He didn’t want them to know, didn’t want them to carry the burden. They were just kids, doing what they were told by a man who should have protected them, encouraged by the public who, like Allison had pointed out, watched children be exploited and abused and did nothing. 

Him not telling them about what the ghosts did, who they were, contributed to them not taking him seriously over the years. They would start to dismiss his jumpiness as him being high since he wouldn’t tell them that a ghost with half a head had just come around the corner, him not hearing them as him being drunk since he wouldn’t tell them that there were half a dozen ghosts in the room screaming. And they would dismiss him talking animatedly as him just wanting attention, not realizing that he just wanted someone with a pulse to just acknowledge that he was still in the land of the living but he had to shout over a dozen people they couldn’t hear.

He had hoped that the ghosts haunting his siblings would move on if he ignored them for long enough. Some of them had over time. The man Vanya had cuckolded – Carl? – stopped haunting her after a few months and he eventually moved on. Granted, Vanya wasn’t the one who killed him, so the grudge wasn’t as strong. Though Vanya still had a few of the assassins royally pissed at her. Diego had some criminals he had thwarted haunting him, and Luther had some of the same ghosts that were around since they were teenagers. Those ghosts knew Klaus wasn’t going to communicate jack shit to Luther and learned that yelling at him did nothing. It was the same with Allison, just a few that really held a grudge that she killed them when she was a teenager. And Five… well Klaus didn’t doubt him when he said he was the best time assassin; the old man had a small army lingering around him. Though, since Five had returned home, more and more of them had slowly moved on.

He knew his siblings had noticed his increased drinking and use of the Walkman. They had all tried to not-so-subtly address it in their own ways. But Klaus didn’t want them involved in this. So he politely but firmly disregarded their attempts.

Klaus had finished his lunch and headed out of the kitchen, only to run into Five who was walking in. Five gave him a slight nod in acknowledgement, knowing Klaus couldn’t hear him with his headphones on. Klaus returned the nod and kept walking. When he turned the corner he came face to face with one of Five’s victims, stopping him in his tracks. This ghost was a prick according to Klaus, he usually had some nasty things to say and seemed quite aggressive. Klaus got over the initial surprise and kept walking. The ghost reached out to him but Klaus didn’t flinch, just expecting to feel the sudden chill pass through his shoulder. Except it didn’t. Instead Klaus felt pressure on his shoulder, his eyes went wide as he was shoved backwards and stumbled a few steps. He and the ghost stared at each other for a moment before the prick realized what he had just done, smiled, and swiped at Klaus again. Klaus flinched this time and raised his arms to cover his head, only to feel a cold chill run through him. The ghost couldn’t touch him now… but he did once... so it could happen again.

Klaus was interrupted from his thoughts when he felt his headphone be lifted from his ear. He thought the asshole had managed to touch him again and he jumped.

“… what’s wrong?”

Klaus looked over and saw that it was Five who had lifted his headphone. Five looked concerned and was giving Klaus a discerning look. He must have seen Klaus stumble and cover his head.

“Klaus, what’s wrong?” He asked again.

“Jesus, nothing, don’t sneak up on people like that!” Klaus lied.

“Sneak up? I was trying to get your attention but you couldn’t hear me and you wouldn’t look at me! You practically jumped out of your skin a few seconds ago, what happened?” Five exclaimed.

“A short little gremlin grabbed my headphones.” Klaus explained, hoping the insult will make Five stop with the questions.

“What happened before?” Five continued undeterred, narrowing his eyes.

“Nothing, Jesus, just drop it!” Klaus said sounding exasperated as he brushed his brother off and walked out of the kitchen and up the stairs.

Klaus slammed his bedroom door behind him. This was bad. This was real bad. Some of the ghosts were reaching out to him, trying to touch him. He closed his eyes and tried to focus on the music.

He was panicking. If they could touch him once, they could do it again. And if his powers were strong enough that ghosts could touch him, soon Klaus may be able to conjure… No, he had to dull his powers. He needed to… he needed to… Klaus started searching his room for any of his old stashes.

****

About an hour after Five had his not-so-unusual meeting with Klaus in the kitchen, he reckoned he should check up on his brother. It wasn’t unusual for Klaus to be jumpy, between seeing the dead and his drug use, Klaus was jumpy most of the time when they were kids. But he had looked scared and that was concerning. 

Five blinked in front of Klaus’s bedroom door and knocked. When there was no answer he figured Klaus still had his headphones on couldn’t hear him. He opened the door and saw Klaus lying on his bed, he still had the headphones on.

Five gently shook his brothers arm, hoping not to freak him out like last time. Klaus didn’t budge. He then removed his headphones and called his name.

“Klaus.” Five said. No answer. “Klaus!” There was still no reaction. It was then that Five started to panic.

“KLAUS!” he shouted and reached for his brothers neck to check his pulse. He couldn’t find one. He couldn’t…Klaus didn’t have a pulse.

Fives own heart started to race and he then noticed the paraphernalia next to Klaus on the bed. An overdose. Klaus had overdosed. What should he do? How long has Klaus been like this? Five couldn’t lose him, he couldn’t lose Klaus. He had to fix this. Klaus was still warm to the touch. He could rewind time, but would it be enough? He had only been able to do a few seconds, he needed longer! But a few seconds was better than nothing, anything was better than nothing, he had to stop wasting time.

It felt like an eternity had been bottled into the 2 seconds in between Five realizing Klaus didn’t have a pulse to starting to rewind time. Five brought his power forth and ripped apart time to make it go back, he strained with the effort to go as far back as he could desperately hoping to be able to see Klaus breathe. He felt himself start to scream with the exertion to keep going until it felt like he was going to pass out and couldn’t go back any further. He stopped and estimated he had rewound maybe 35 seconds, it wasn’t enough, but it was something, something to give Klaus a fighting chance. Five was panting but he couldn’t stop. 

He grabbed Klaus and dragged him off of the bed and onto the hard floor to begin CPR. He placed his hands on Klaus’s chest and began, trying to keep the correct rhythm.

“LUTHER! MOM! HELP!” Five shouted. “HELP!”

****  
Klaus was in a forest, walking a pathway he had been on before. Though he hadn’t expected to find himself here again, he found that he also didn’t mind it. He knew there were some people he would rather avoid though, and he most definitely would not be walking into the barbershop again. That and –

“Why are you here again?”

Too late, she’s here. Klaus turned around to see bike girl behind him. She looked quite annoyed to see him again.

“Oh, well hello again!” he said with false cheer. She rolled her eyes at him.

“Why are you here again?” she repeated herself.

“Well I believe it’s this pesky thing called death. If that’s one of your creations, you have no one to blame but yourself.” He replied.

“You need to stop coming here.” She said annoyed.

“I don’t think I have much say in that matter.” 

“You don’t belong here. And if you keep coming here one day you won’t be able to go back to your body. You need to stop.”

“What if I wanted to stay?” Klaus asked as he hunched down to her height in a demeaning way.

“Don’t.” she deadpanned.

“Maybe I just really love what you’ve done with the place. With all the trees and nature.” He continued as he looked around.

“Why are you lingering here? Are you looking for him?” she asked.

“Him?” Klaus wasn’t sure what ‘him’ she was referring to. His Father? No. Dave? Klaus was actually more worried about seeing a Dave that never fell in love with him, so no.

“The one who entered the Ether. You can’t conjure him back so did you come to find him?” She answered.

“ ‘Entered the Ether?’ What do you mean?” Klaus asked.

Bike girl huffed at him. She then turned her head to look to her left, and Klaus followed her gaze. It was like they had been rapidly transported to the edge of the universe without moving. There were still trees and forests surround them, but now at the edge of the path was an endless expanse of darkness with small bright glowing lights all around.

“What… is this?” Klaus asked.

“Do you not pay attention? The Ether! Where all souls eventually end up to begin the process again.” She answered as if explaining something very basic to someone very stupid.

“Again? Are you talking about reincarnation?” Klaus asked as he reached his hand out into the expanse.

“Reincarnation is for a plane of existence that has time. Time isn’t a thing here, everything just is. Though, you might not realize that.” She said rudely.

Klaus’s hand passed over the edge of the path to the Ether. What he felt was overwhelming. It was billions of souls, he could feel them scattered throughout. But it felt like they were far along in losing their earthly attachments. Beyond just ‘moving on’ from Earth’s plane of existence to this one, these souls seemed to be distant from their former lives, even losing their human shapes. But through it all Klaus felt him, distinct from the rest. Ben.

“What do you think you’re doing!?” Bike girl shouted at him, causing Klaus to retreat his hand.

“What?” Klaus asked surprised.

“You were about to pull him back! Why would you do that? He’s finally moved on after you pulled him back the first time! He doesn’t have a body in your plane of existence anymore!” she was angry.

“I wasn’t trying to!” Klaus said defensively. “But, is that something I could do?”

“Why would you want to? He doesn’t have a body, he doesn’t belong in your plane anymore!”

“Right.” Said Klaus. He still felt guilty for conjuring Ben all those years ago.

“Whenever it’s your time, I hope you go straight to the Ether.” She said.

“Oh, and what if this is my time?” he asked.

“It’s not.” She said, but her voice was distorted, distant.

“What?” he asked.

“It’s not.” She repeated but her voice was far away. Klaus realized he was going back.

****

Five continued with the CPR, forcing air down Klaus’s airways before going back to chest compressions. He heard Luther thundering down the hall after hearing Five yell for help. Luther ran into the room to see Five desperately trying to get Klaus’s heart to start up again.

“MOM!” Five shouted again. Luther knelt down on Klaus’s other side, his face was panicked. He was about to take Five’s place for the chest compressions when Klaus’s eyes shot open and he gasped for air.

“KLAUS!” Five shouted, as he placed a hand under his brothers’ head.

Klaus looked up at Five. Five looked scared, his face was pale and he had tears running down his cheeks.

“Hey.” Klaus said faintly before passing out again.

“No, no, no, no, no!” Five yelled as he checked Klaus’s neck for a pulse. He was relieved to feel the slow but steady thrum proving his brother was alive. Five took a few deep shuddering breaths.

Luther had Klaus’s wrist in his hand, feeling his pulse as well. He turned to Five.

“What happened?” Luther asked.

“Overdose. He didn’t have a pulse.” Five answered in a shaky voice.

“Looks like you brought him back. Let’s get him to the infirmary.” Luther’s voice was low, and he had tears in his eyes. They had almost lost Klaus. They almost lost him. Thank god Five found him.

Luther carefully picked Klaus up and took him to the infirmary. Five followed, not taking his eyes off of Klaus. They saw Mom rushing towards them in the hall, she must have come running when she heard Five. She quickly ascertained the situation and they all rushed to the infirmary together. Luther and Five stood aside while Mom worked, thankful for each beep of the heart monitor.

Pogo joined them. The old chimp used a cane to walk and was not fast, so it had taken him a while to get to the infirmary when he heard the commotion. He quietly took in the scene and understood. He stood beside Five and placed a hand on his shoulder. Despite not liking being touched, Five found Pogo’s gesture comforting and didn’t shake him off.

They weren’t sure how long they stood there, but eventually Mom had finished and now it was just waiting and monitoring. Five pulled up a chair and sat next to Klaus, his eyes flickering from their brother to the various monitors that showed he was still alive. Luther said he was going to call the others to let them know, but would be back.  
***

Luther’s first call was to Diego. He made sure to start off with saying that Klaus was alive, but had overdosed. It was important to say he was alive first, even a moment of worrying if someone you loved had survived or not was too cruel. The conversation was only a few seconds long, Diego had said he was on his way and hung up. The next call was to Vanya. He told her the same thing he had told Diego, and the line went dead. He wasn’t sure if she hung up or not, he probably should have planned that out better but the world hadn’t ended so hopefully Vanya was okay. His final call was to Allison. She was now getting the next flight out.  
***

Every piece of glass in Vanya’s apartment had shattered at once. The windows, light bulbs, mugs, everything. Overdosed. Klaus had overdosed. She held the receiver in her hand but she no longer heard Luther, she didn’t even hear a busy tone and realized that her power burst must have broken her phone as well. It didn’t matter; she needed to get to the Academy now. She grabbed her coat and keys that were hanging by the door as she ran out, slamming the door behind her and not bothering to lock it.

When she made it outside she realized that she had burst every window in the building. There was a cab outside, its driver staring at the building in disbelief. Vanya jumped into it, startling the cabbie, and gave him the Academy’s address. He didn’t move, so she shouted the address to him this time. That seemed to startle him back to reality and he began to drive.

Outside it started to pour rain. Vanya was vaguely aware of feeling her powers emanate from her, but she didn’t particularly care. The cab started to sputter and came to a halt. Shit, she must have damaged it somehow. She shoved cash through the slot to the driver before jumping out to run to the Academy. She still had miles to go.

When she finally arrived she wretched the front doors open and ran into the foyer.

“Vanya!” she heard Luther call out her name and he was suddenly in front of her. “Vanya, you need to calm down.”

She tried to push past him to get up the stairs but he was blocking her. She tried to get around him and he picked her up.

“Get out of my way!” she shouted. The chandelier above them started to shake and dust fell from the beams.

“You need to calm down! You can’t go into the infirmary powered up like this! You could break stuff! It’s okay, he’s alive, but you can’t go in there like this!” He insisted, still not letting her down despite getting hit with a wave of energy.

Oh. She hadn’t realized she was powered up. She could have done a lot of damage in the infirmary if Luther hadn’t caught her. She tried to inhale deeply and hadn’t realized how out of breath she was. After about 20 seconds she started to feel more in control. Luther must have thought so too as he set her back down on the ground.

“Your eyes aren’t glowing anymore.” He informed her. “Do you feel like you’re ready?”

She held up a finger and took a few more deep breaths. He waited with her patiently, until she eventually nodded.

“Thanks.” She said.

“Of course, I’ve got your back. It’s okay.” He said. 

They made their way up to the infirmary. Vanya stopped in the doorway, taking in the scene, Luther hovering behind her. Diego was there, sitting next to Klaus’s side. He had one hand wrapped around Klaus’s wrist, the other cupped Klaus’s head with his thumb making small circular motions on his temple. Five sat on his other side, his face was pale and he had clearly been crying. Pogo was standing off to the side, watching them all, and Mom was sitting behind the desk in the far end of the room. Vanya slowly approached. Luther pulled up a chair for her and she sat next to Diego, while Luther resumed his seat next to Five. Klaus looked pale and clammy. A blanket covered him but his arms were sticking out to allow for the IV and various monitors.

Movement to her left caught Vanya’s attention, and she saw Pogo offering her a towel. She had forgotten she had just run several miles in the rain. She took the towel and thanked him. He gave her a sad smile and placed a hand on her shoulder. She reached up and covered his hand with her own, giving his a small squeeze.

They all sat vigil, waiting for Klaus to wake up. At some point Five recounted what had happened, which included a brief explanation to Luther on what rewinding time was. After some hours Mom had to leave to recharge, but gave them strict instructions to get her should anything happen. Pogo also left but would check in from time to time. Luther had his elbows on his knees and held his head in his hands. Five’s knee would sometimes bounce up and down, or he would tap his fingers anxiously. Vanya was leaning against Diego, who now had one arm around her and his right hand around Klaus’s wrist. It was still raining outside, but Vanya didn’t feel like she could stop it, much less have the energy to try.

They heard the front door open and close, followed by hurried footsteps. Allison appeared in the doorway, her face distraught. Five stood up so that Allison could take his seat closest to Klaus. They all knew Allison was the closest personally to him, it was only right that she sat nearest.

She sat down and cupped Klaus’s face with her hand, burying her fingers in his hair.

“What happened?” she asked them while still staring at Klaus’s face. Five placed a hand on her shoulder and recounted the events again.

***

The siblings sat around their brother for some time. The silence was eventually broken by Allison.

“Klaus?” She said quietly.

The others started to sit up from their slouching positions, realizing that Klaus was starting to wake up.

“Klaus?” Allison said again.

“Hmmm?” Klaus mumbled as he opened his eyes.

“Hey.” Allison said, her voice cracked but she was smiling at him.

“Allison? Hi, what are you…” Klaus started to say but then he noticed his surroundings, “what are you all doing here?”

“What do you remember?” she asked.

Klaus took a moment. The ghosts, finding his stash, bike girl, the Ether, Ben, Five crying… shit. He looked around again and noticed the looks on his siblings faces. They were worried, and some had clearly been crying. Diego’s hand was loosely around his wrist.

“Hey, guys, I’m fine!” Klaus tried to assure them.

“Fine? Klaus you didn’t have a pulse!” Five exclaimed. But his voice wasn’t angry or accusatory, it was more … pleading? Shit he had to play this off, he didn’t want them to worry.

“It happens, you know me.” He tried to adopt a casual voice and sit up to show that he was fine. Only to have Diego place an arm under him to help him, and Allison shoved another pillow behind his back to help prop him up. So not exactly the autonomous ‘I’m okay’ aura he wanted to project.

“What do you mean it happens? Klaus, how many times has this happened?” Luther asked.

Klaus was about to brush it off when he heard Vanya give a small gasp. The look on her face nearly broke his heart as she pieced together what he meant. He needed to downplay this.

“Sometimes I conk out, see some cosmic shit, meet god – she doesn’t particularly like me – and wake up.” Klaus explained as if he was commenting on the weather.

That… was a lot to unpack. Klaus met god? More than once? She doesn’t like him? Screw her. They had questions but now was not the time for that.

“Why’d you do it?” Diego asked.

“Why did an addict take drugs?” Klaus countered.

“We know you’ve been off the hard stuff for a long time, Klaus. W-w-why now?” Diego persisted.

Klaus was quiet, and Diego realized he wasn’t going to get an answer.

“We’re worried, Klaus. We just want to help.” Diego continued.

“We’re here for you.” Vanya said quietly as she gently touched his arm.

“I’m fine! I don’t need you all hovering over me like creepy specters!” Klaus claimed.  
Klaus shrugged his siblings off and tried to get off the infirmary bed. Luther gently but firmly kept Klaus on the bed with a hand on his shoulder.

“You’re staying here for the night. Maybe longer if Mom says so.” He said in a caring but firm voice.

“I’ll um, go let Mom and Pogo know you’re awake. They’ve been worried.” Vanya said and she walked out.

Five looked at him intensely for a few moments.

“Don’t do anything that would make you meet god again.” He said before blinking out of the room. Five had blinked into Klaus’s room and began a thorough search for any more stashes. 

Mom entered the infirmary and started asking Klaus questions and checking the various monitors. Luther warned him to stay there for the night or else he would make him, and left.

Allison and Diego shared a look, having a silent conversation. Allison won. Diego stood up, placed his hand on the back of Klaus’s head and said;

“Get some rest. We’ll talk more tomorrow.” Before leaving.

Pogo came in for a minute, saying he was glad Klaus was awake and such. Eventually Mom had finished, and only Allison was left with him. Klaus turned to her and opened his mouth to start to say something, but she cut him off.

“You’re not getting rid of me.” She said. Klaus recognized her determined face. He closed his mouth and just gave out a huff.

Allison stayed with him throughout the night. He tired to sleep but awoke with a start from a nightmare. Allison was next to him immediately, telling him he was safe. She wasn’t sure if it was a nightmare about ghosts or Vietnam, but either way he was safe. He clung onto her hug like a lifeline.

“Klaus, what happened?” she asked. He knew she wasn’t asking about the nightmare. He looked at her, taking in her face. She had always been the sibling he had been closest to, the one he felt safest confiding in. 

He told her about how his powers were getting stronger, how he was afraid that he might conjure a Dave that never loved him. He didn’t tell her who the ghosts were, she didn’t need to worry about being haunted. But he told her his fears, how he needed something stronger to keep his powers at bay. 

“Why did you take so much? Klaus, you… you would have known it was too much.” She said when he had finished.

“It wasn’t intentional. I promise it wasn’t. I was panicking and just didn’t want to hear those assholes as quickly as possible. I didn’t think about how much.” He said.

“Are they loud now? Do you need your Walkman?” she asked.

“No, not right now.” He said while giving her a soft smile.

“Why didn’t you tell us it was getting worse? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“It wasn’t a big deal –“ he started to claim but changed course when he saw the look on her face, “- I didn’t want to worry you.”

“I love you! I’m always going to worry about you! I worry about all of you guys! That’s what happens when you love people, you always worry if they’re okay!” she wanted to make sure he knew that he wasn’t the only one she worried about, otherwise it could come off as demeaning.

“Allison, I-“

“So talk to me! Tell me when things get rough! Because I love you! I don’t want to lose you!”

“Thanks Allison.”

After some time she told him to try to get some more sleep if he could. She would be there if he had another nightmare, or if the ghosts got loud.

***

Over the next few days Klaus’s siblings didn’t leave his side. There was always at least one of them around. He knew they were trying to not come off as too overbearing, no doubt worried that he would run off and disappear for a few days like he did whenever they pushed sobriety too hard when they were younger. But they were worried, about his relapse, about withdrawal, about him. Allison was with him nearly all the time. He didn’t mind her presence, he loved having time to be with his best friend. And one or two of the others would always find some reason to around as well.

Vanya and Diego and both called out of work for the week, and Allison had her assistant ship her luggage as she had left immediately with just what she was already carrying in her purse (she also had her lawyer point out that family emergencies were baked into her contract so either the filming schedule had to be adjusted or have her added in post-production). 

It was a day before Mom let him leave the infirmary. He still felt like shit but his siblings were constantly seeing if he was okay and would just sit with him, sometimes with an arm wrapped around him. They didn’t yell at him, blame him, or insult him like they usually did when they felt he pulled one his ‘stunts.’ They had been genuinely scared that they came close to losing him and often just wanted to be near him. He had noticed that some of the ghosts that haunted them had moved on. It happened sometimes; the ghosts no longer hold onto their grudge, they see their hauntee change, or see them get hurt and consider that comeuppance enough and they go ahead to the afterlife. He hoped they were annoying bike girl.

He hadn’t realized his siblings cared so much. Would care so much if he… 

Luther apologized for being dismissive the time Klaus said he had talked to Dad in the kitchen, the morning after Luther got laid and had a massive hangover. He had pieced together that it meant Klaus had momentarily died that night.

“Don’t worry about it, water under the bridge.” Klaus had said.

“Wait, you met Dad?” Diego asked.

“Yeah, wasn’t very pleasant, wouldn’t want to run into the old bastard again.” Klaus answered.

“Did you punch him?”

“No.”

“I would have punched him.”

“Maybe next time.”

“There will be no next time!” Five had shouted from the other room.

Over time Klaus had told the rest of his siblings the basics of what he had already told Allison, but with less details. Shortly after that, Allison approached him with an idea; therapy.

“Therapy?” Klaus scoffed.

“Don’t knock it! Vanya and I are both in therapy right now, and it’s helped us!” she defended.

“Alright Allison, but your guys’ issues are on this plane of existence. Ghostly problems are a bit different, they’ll just try to lump it in with another disorder to make sense of it.”

“That’s why we’ll vet a good one. The world knows you can see ghosts, it’s not – it’s not hallucinations or anything. And… it may be good to find one with experience working with veterans.”

“What do you mean?”

“You went to war Klaus. You went through hell during it, and you never got to unpack that.”

“Are you saying I should see someone because you think I have PTSD?”

“Are you denying that you have PTSD?”

He knew it was pointless trying to argue with her on that point, he had already told her quite a bit and she had picked up on some of his behaviors as well. The way he would grip Dave’s dog tags, how he covered his ears for loud noises.

“I’ve tried therapy before Allison, it doesn’t work.” He said instead.

“Not one-on-one. You were in 12 step programs before which probably aren’t the best for you seeing as how you say god doesn’t like you.”

“Bike girl told me she doesn’t like me. She said she hoped I would go straight to the Ether when it was my time.”

Allison’s face looked lost.

“I have no idea if that’s bad or not. What’s the Ether?” She said after a moment.

“It’s like… where souls go when they lose their earthly attachment. It didn’t feel like a bad place. But it was the way she said it.”

“Klaus,” she started as she held his hand, “It may be good to talk to a professional about this stuff. You’ve been trying to deal with all of this by yourself. And I know you like to pretend that you’re fine, but it’s okay to not be fine. I love you, we all love you so much Klaus. But Dad gave us really shit coping skills.”

That was an understatement.

“I’ll think about it.” He said as he squeezed her hand. She knew he was mostly saying it so she wouldn’t press him further now, but it was still a small step.  
***

It was sometime later in the week, and the siblings were having dinner in the kitchen. They were engaging in a Hargreeves family activity: roasting someone for messing up with their powers.

Vanya’s explosion had made the third page of a local newspaper the day after Klaus OD’d. And now that some time had passed, and no one was injured, they could joke about it. Vanya had laid her head on the table as her siblings took turns making fun of her. Part of the reasoning was that she couldn’t catastrophize the accident too much if they made fun of it, but it was mostly for their own enjoyment.

“At least this one was localized, not your usual stuff.” Five said.

“Yeah, you just had a little accident.” Luther chortled.

“Oh my god, don’t call it that. That makes it sound like I wet the bed.” Vanya mumbled into the table.

“Which one would be more embarrassing?” Diego asked.

“Uuuugh.” Vanya grumbled.

“The conspiracy theories you gave rise to are amazing.” Allison said as she grabbed the newspaper, “The gas leak sounds probable, but my favorites have got to be the experimental electro magnetic pulse hidden by the government, and the mob warning message for the businesses on the first floor.”

“Between this, the random bouts of rain, and the streetlights back in March, if you keep this up it’s just a matter of time before you become a cryptid, V.” Diego jokingly warned.

“Ah, instead of Mothman we get an anxious violinist.” Said Klaus.

“C’mon Vanya, it’s cathartic to joke about mistakes after.” Allison said.

“How is this cathartic?” Vanya asked, finally lifting her head off the table.

“Well, it is for the rest of us.” Luther answered.

The dinner continued, with the siblings occasionally spit-balling what Vanya’s cryptid name would be (which included “Glowstick” and “The ‘Treble-d’ Woman”). The past few days had been tense, and they enjoyed the lightheartedness of the evening. Klaus seemed to be doing better, and now that he had told them a bit about what he was going through they felt slightly better equipped to help him in the future. They all knew it was a long road, but he was still with them and they were going to make sure it stayed that way.

****

 _“Medic! MEDIC!” Klaus shouted again and again. Dave had been shot. Dave had a gaping hole in his chest. Klaus tried to stem the bleeding, but it wasn’t enough, it wasn’t enough. “MEDIC!”  
_  
There were voices all around him, shouting at him. They were screaming for justice, for revenge, telling him how exactly they were killed, telling him what they wanted to do to him and his siblings, asking why they had to die. Klaus sat bolt upright in bed.

“SHUT UP!” He shouted as he covered his ears. The ghosts were surrounding him, reaching for him. He closed his eyes. He felt someone touch him and he jerked away. They touched him again, putting something on his head. His headphones? The music started playing. He opened his eyes to see Allison kneeling in front of him, and Luther and Diego standing in both his doorways. Klaus slumped forward, resting his head on Allison’s shoulder. She started to rub soothing circles on his back as she sat next to him.

Klaus felt Allison start to talk, and he opened his eyes to see if she was trying to talk to him. He saw she was facing the doorway, and Five and Vanya had entered the room at sometime. He made eye contact with Vanya and she approached him, sitting on his other side with a hand on his shoulder. They sat like that for a while until the tape in the Walkman reached the end. Klaus was about to rewind it when he heard the prick ghost vulgarly describe how he wanted to kill Five. That set Klaus off, and he pulled away from Allison to sit upright.

“I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP!” he shouted. Klaus’s face was distorted in anger, his siblings couldn’t recall the last time they had seen him so furious. He was staring at the prick unwaveringly, waiting for whatever happens next.

He waited and nothing happened. Everyone was quiet. His siblings were quiet out of shock but the ghosts… they couldn’t talk? He noticed his hands were glowing blue and then looked back up at the ghosts. They weren’t corporeal, they just weren’t talking… they had done what he said. 

“JUST LEAVE US THE FUCK ALONE!” Klaus shouted, still pissed. He watched the ghosts slowly drift out of the room, away from him, away from his siblings. He wasn’t sure how long it would last, but he was grateful for the reprieve. When the last one passed over the doorway Klaus let out a sigh and slumped against Allison again.

“Klaus, are you okay?” He heard Vanya ask him quietly. 

He thought about it before giving a small nod.

“What happened?” Allison gently asked him.

“Ghosts were being loud assholes again.” He answered weakly.

“Your hands were glowing blue there for a minute. Are you… good?” Diego asked him.

“Yeah. I think… I think I commanded the dead.” Klaus answered.  
***

Allison had stayed with him the rest of the night in case the ghosts came back. At breakfast they all discussed what happened last night, making sure Klaus was okay, and his new ability to command the dead. He refused to tell them what had made him so angry, just that they pissed him off.

“Is this ability something you would... want to practice?” Luther asked hesitantly. He knew Klaus loathed training his power after the traumatizing nights with Dad.

“Practice?” Klaus said.

“So you get better at it, maybe be able to do it when you’re not – be able to do it before the ghosts get that bad.” Luther quickly amended, not wanting to say when you’re not so furious.

“You wouldn’t be alone.” Diego said.

“Maybe.” Said Klaus.

“It wouldn’t be like with Dad. Just… whatever you’re okay with.” Five added.

“Yeah, we’re here for you. Whatever you need.” Vanya added.

“It may be good, it seems like a helpful ability.” Allison said as she held his hand.

Klaus thought about it. Of all his abilities, this one was useful to him. But did he want to improve his powers? He then thought about how worried his siblings had been about him the past few days, how he had never realized they cared about him so much. Not getting a grip on his powers could lead to the very real possibility of seeing bike girl again sooner rather than later.

“Okay. But if I say enough, it’s enough.” Klaus said. He was not about to be thrown into another mausoleum situation, forced to be somewhere against his will.

“Of course. Like Five said, whatever you’re okay with. Slow and steady, like with Vanya’s training.” Luther assured him.

Klaus nodded his agreement. It was decided that if he was okay with it, they would start with one of the usual Academy ghosts later that day and go from there.

After breakfast Klaus went in search for Allison. The ghosts were one issue, but she had accurately pointed out another. He kept thinking back to the nightmares he would have of Vietnam, of Dave dying. He found her sitting on the chair in Vanya’s room, talking to Vanya who was sitting on her bed. The two looked up at him when he stood in the doorway. He contemplated if he wanted to say this in front of her as well and decided it was fine. He had already told her quite a bit about Dave and Vietnam already, and hell she had even offered to go with him to meetings or anything else so he wouldn’t be alone.

“So… your crazy idea about therapy.” He said to Allison.

“Not a crazy idea, but what about it?” she replied.

“Maybe I want to check it out.” He answered.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Where would I start?”

“Vanya and I actually already have a list of potential good fits.” Allison answered as she motioned to Vanya who took a notebook out of her nightstand drawer.

“They’re all currently accepting new clients,” Vanya started as she flipped it open. Klaus sat next to her on the bed, and Allison moved to sit on his other side, “these are all their noted specialties. Most of them are veterans, these ones are around your age, and these ones are older but they did serve in Vietnam.”

Klaus listened as his sisters described their reasoning of why each one on the list might be a good fit, they emphasized that if he didn’t ‘vibe’ with a therapist after a few sessions it was okay to keep looking for one that met his needs. They would ask him what his thoughts were, and if there was anything else they should look for in a potential therapist. They had clearly put a lot of thought and effort into this. But waited for him to choose whether he even wanted to try therapy before showing him. He felt very loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End notes on what happened in case any of the TW's made you go "Hmm, no thanks"
> 
> -Klaus's powers become too strong for him and he uses again and he ends up seeing Bike Girl.  
> -Bike Girl isn't pleased that he's back. She shows him something called the "Ether" where souls that have moved past their earthly attachments eventually go. Klaus can feel Ben in the Ether, but doesn't pull him forward  
> -The siblings all show up to support Klaus  
> -Vanya broke every piece of glass in her apartment when she heard what happened  
> -Allison is a great BFF  
> -Klaus dreams of when Dave died, woke up shouting and the sibs show up to help  
> -Klaus learns he can command the ghosts  
> -Klaus agrees to try therapy
> 
> (-Five will fight bike girl himself if any of his siblings die again)


End file.
